Keefaz

Not really.

I had a dream the other night where I went round Dyer's house and challenged him to a keepie-uppie contest. He bottled out of it, the big girl. I'm not sure this is on topic.

We can only hope.

Aye the horseshoe effect looks the best, and is actually planning permission viable. Could put some kind of poncy architectual arch in between or something. Or have it spanned by a huge statue of Shearer, legs akimbo.

Also, I wonder what these managers 'lose record' is, an aal...

I wonder what Souness's win record is?

Terry, Ferdinand, Woodgate or similar. Having said that, even good (not even great) defenders would cope if they had a Makelele/Keane type player in front of them.

Bwahahaha. Funny how they all come across as decent lads on that video, but often don't do so well when interviewed individually. Also, Diarra: decent player.

There'll be bloody no one there. £20 to watch a load of Belgian part-timers when it's on telly?

I think SJP would look best with the 3 sides. I've seen the four-sided mock-up and it looks really clunky.

McCarthy is 29?

Arf! This thread is comedy gold.

Actually, I did read it, and my response... terracotta?

'Do a Gullit'? No, ta.

I swear I don't ever need to hear Shearer speak ever again. I can just imagine what he's going to say about 99% of the time I'll be spot on.

This post was too big to even conside reading.

I rate him, but not for us.

Thought that Man Utd match was alright, actually. Good on Redding. If we were that organised we'd be champions of the universe.

Shoo-in, mate.

I dunno. I saw this after the England match and he was banging on about how, in the past, the England team had plenty of players from the North-East: Gazza, Waddle, Beardsley, etc. and how there's none now. I look at the England team sheet and two North-East players started the match--Woodgate and Carrick: 22% of the team! And another, Downing, came on in the second half! Once Shola and Taylor get called up we'll pwn the national team.

He's an entertaining maniac, but I remember when he was in the frame for the Toon job people were pretty wary.

Tevez hasn't even feckin scored! HE'S MINT!

We should get 15, but I think--given how inconsistent we are--10 would be an excellent return. However, I suspect we'll get 8: points dropped at all our away fixtures.

Kuyt seems quite old-school in style to me. Works hard but doesn't have much class about him. Seems to miss plenty of chances too.

Rooney better than Henry? Johnson better than Martins? I'm looking at this thinking: in order of what?