Happy Face

Find this a tad disappointing since you were the one that suggested I hoy my dubious figures into a blog ten years back. Keep on keeping on, man. It's fair enough tbh. I cringe at anything I wrote more than a week myself

Find this a tad disappointing since you were the one that suggested I hoy my dubious figures into a blog ten years back.

I don't think I ever apologised to everyone on here that I ever told Pardew was about the limit of who Ashley was capable of appointing for us. I know I eventually became Terminator 2 and fought the good fight when it became totally intolerable, but Jesus Wept. Thank the lord that Rafa approached us and saved the fat fuck from himself (and Carver/McClaren).

Morning all, sorry to return only to whore myself, but some might find this useful. Sick of there not being any app or twitter account that will push a notification to my phone just for the main nufc related news (team lineups, goals, completed transfers and when tickets are on sale) without a load of other content getting pushed at me. So I'm playing with doing my own - @NUFCalerts Follow and set up mobile notifications if you want instant alerts for all of the above... as long as I have a data connection and get the club notifications in the first place

Done an article on how the stats show Benitez is already second only to Keegan and Robson in the pantheon of Premier League era NUFC managers... http://www.themag.co.uk/2016/09/rafa-benitez-gaining-kevin-keegan-sir-bobby-elo-ratings-newcastle-united/

Did an article for the TF summer special on how Ashley's increased ticket prices without anyone realising https://t.co/QLLRd7VsvX

I've had a couple of articles in the Chronicle but nowt on the finances. I think they try not to go off piste on the accounts. They'll cover the points raised in each set of accounts and repeat the club talking points, but when it comes to building an overall pattern and damning the club for it, I think they don't have the accountancy experts they would like to be comfortable going to print on it. Not that I'm an expert, but that's the point, they can't have my wild accusations being printed without covering their arse with an expensive expert to double check all the numbers. I missed this one off the Mag article... http://nufc-ashlies.blogspot.co.uk/2016/04/20142015-accounts_25.html

Under-reported issues raised by the accounts... http://www.themag.co.uk/2016/04/newcastle-united-accounts-questions-contradictions-omissions/

The bit in bold is interesting. Not sure why the Telegraph are claiming that as some sort of inside track. The Mag reported on the statement in the accounts last week that said SD will now pay for promotion. http://www.themag.co.uk/2016/04/breaking-news-sports-direct-will-now-pay-advertising-newcastle-united/

I've done some complicated sums and worked out the chances of each option. 1. Relegated, he walks (90%) 2. Relegated, he wants to stay, Ashley gets rid (5%) 3. We stop up, Ashley pisses him off by listening to the footballing acumen of messrs Charnley & Moncur, he walks (4%) 4. We stop up, he stays, everyone is happy and we climb the league (1%)

http://i65.tinypic.com/rm360g.png

http://media.boingboing.net/wp-content/uploads/2014/11/FawltyTowers1-3_11.jpg "Don't mention Pardew!! I did once but I think I got away with it"

https://twitter.com/bigchrisholt/status/718025153129619456 Outside of a couple of peaks, there's no point in 4 years that we look like we'd accrue enough points to stop up. That said, if Pardew could put runs like that together, than Benitez can.

cleared up that wages graph to make the point clearer... https://twitter.com/bigchrisholt/status/717835869617569792

https://twitter.com/bigchrisholt/status/717785744031539200

https://twitter.com/bigchrisholt/status/717734813550190592

Deloitte say the matchday income the accounts will confirm in a couple of months will be up on 13/14, even having played 3 fewer home games. Both other revenue streams (TV & commercial) have dropped. Remarkable that the fans are the only ones still pumping growing sums into the club... but being called delusional, fickle and over demanding.

...and taken £11m out. It's a strange article. In one paragraph he's arguing that Ashley is brilliant because the financials are excellent with the club on a self financing even keel and in another paragraph he's lauding Ashley for ongoing personal investment being made into the club. It's got to be one or the other, they can't have their cake and eat it. Either it needs his investment or it doesn't. It doesn't.

Think we'll break even on cabella after amortisation... if the fees mentioned are right. Will have to get £9m+ for Thauvin for that to be true in his case.

I'm not arguing that spending hasn't been brought forward due to the threat of relegation, like the winter we bought Sissoko and co (so had nothing left to spend the following summer.) I was responding to the argument "8 years of chronic under investment has forced his hand and he'll now be sh*tting himself" by offering the reminder that the club has spent all it's available funds consistently over the past 8 years. I don't think there has been 8 years of chronic under-investment because I don't think a club should be subsidised by borrowing. The club has always preferred to spend the available sums in the summer, and I fear for the Summer spending given what's been thrown at the situation this month - though I would think we will recoup a good wedge by selling failures and wantaways like Sissoko, Tiote, Thauvin, Cabella, Cisse etc as well as some talent I'd rather not lose (wijnaldum & Perez).

Gravy blood hasn't supplied any dosh to buy us out of trouble in any situation, no matter how dire, since we were in the championship. That's the point, the club is and always has been allowed to spend what it earns as long as it doesn't lead to reporting an accounting loss, other than an £11m loan repayment to Ashley in 2012 - £18m shy of what he had been planning to take out. No other cash in the club is being sat on longer than half a season until the next window opens, let alone being siphoned out.

Obviously tongue in cheek but there'll be loads now who'll have that opinion for real, not being able to grasp that 8 years of chronic under investment has forced his hand and he'll now be sh*tting himself over the possibility of missing out on next seasons TV bonanza. Unfortunately for him, even if we do sign a striker, the manager he appointed to get the results needed clearly isn't capable of doing so. While I'm sure he is very worried about relegation, we spent £50m+ in the summer too when he could have sat back and seen how things went. I don't think we're spending because of the threat of relegation, I think we always planned to spend the money the club has generated, as we have in all the previous seasons where we didn't sell anyone at £20m+ profit. I think the players we're buying are a more telling change in policy in that we're buying Premier league experience I don't think we would have done if we were higher up the table. If the plan is to constantly spend the money the club brings in and not just when facing the threat of relegation then why did we end up with 35m sitting in a bank account at one point? Because we sold Cabaye for £20m that January and spent that profit and the profit from 13/14 revenues in the Summer after the books showed a snapshot of cash balances in June. Preference to spend in Summer cash that's been earned. So we had £35m in the bank on June 30th and spent £37.4m in July/August. I'd seen a big enough sample back in September 2014 when I was pointing to consistently increased spending and saying we'd continue to be spending more. http://www.themag.co.uk/2014/09/mike-ashley-ready-invest-manager-now/ Revisited my view in Summer.. http://www.themag.co.uk/2015/07/a-corner-turned-or-history-repeating-newcastle-united-transfer-spending/ I pointed to the growth in spending being a year on year pattern that was clearly going to continue but got stick on here for it because the sale of Cabaye meant one year didn't follow the trend. I can only see the increased spending continuing as long as we stay in the league, regardless of where we sit in the league.

Obviously tongue in cheek but there'll be loads now who'll have that opinion for real, not being able to grasp that 8 years of chronic under investment has forced his hand and he'll now be sh*tting himself over the possibility of missing out on next seasons TV bonanza. Unfortunately for him, even if we do sign a striker, the manager he appointed to get the results needed clearly isn't capable of doing so. While I'm sure he is very worried about relegation, we spent £50m+ in the summer too when he could have sat back and seen how things went. Ridiculous statement. Take Wijnaldum, Mitrovic and Mbemba out of this squad and "seen how things went"? We'd be propping up Aston Villa. Summer spending wasn't about doing the minimum to survive though. Spending more than 18 other clubs isn't a strategy to just survive.

Obviously tongue in cheek but there'll be loads now who'll have that opinion for real, not being able to grasp that 8 years of chronic under investment has forced his hand and he'll now be sh*tting himself over the possibility of missing out on next seasons TV bonanza. Unfortunately for him, even if we do sign a striker, the manager he appointed to get the results needed clearly isn't capable of doing so. While I'm sure he is very worried about relegation, we spent £50m+ in the summer too when he could have sat back and seen how things went. I don't think we're spending because of the threat of relegation, I think we always planned to spend the money the club has generated, as we have in all the previous seasons where we didn't sell anyone at £20m+ profit. I think the players we're buying are a more telling change in policy in that we're buying Premier league experience I don't think we would have done if we were higher up the table.

Cheers