Happinesstan

Blah blah Ashley blah blah money blah blah no right to be near the top blah potato blah blah Ted's blah blah wife blah blah is blah blah dead. What a sketch BRILLIAAANT!

I didn't mean for anyone to watch it.

Credit to him for remaining professional and not allowing his bias to overtake. Any Man U pundit would have been indignant.

I think that will be key to Rafa staying. In his interview on TS he acknowledges that we can't compete for the most expensive players, and states that is why we need to be getting our signings in early. I assume Rafa knows who he wants, and we've got until Jun 30th to sign them.

I just want him to stay, and for the fat cunt to suffer a long, slow painful death go.

Credit to the lad, he's worked his socks off. People need to remember that when we signed Almiron our entire game changed. It wasn't just Almiron who had to adapt, the whole team has had to do the same. Ritchie has played, very effectively, for a team that lacked the kind of elements that Almiron brings, it's no wonder his first thought isn't "right, where's that nippy little bugger?" Shame Almiron has got injured because we were beginning to get there. Thought Ritchie and Almron linked up lovely to set up Ki's chance.

Stars without their make-up.

Gonna get beat, and Cardiff will beat Liverpool tomorrow.

Kane will definitely do it. But I wouldn't be surprised to see Lukaku do it, also. He's a 15 goal a season player, if he can stay fit and get the games he'll do it. He has the potential to be as good as Rondon. Also, Rashford is young enough as to make you think he hasn't quite peaked yet. 2-3 20 goal seasons will bring his target down.

I think he'd be a fool to stay, and I know he ain't no fool. I do pity him, however.

Is it? The first two lines work, "We've got Mirandinha, he's not from Argentina" but the last two don't really fit: "he's from Brazil, he's fucking brill". Or do you add an extra syllable in like most chants that involve Wembley do? La-la-la-lah. La-la-la-lah. It fits.

That is quite clear, thanks. But did he mean to handle it? I would say no, therefore not a handball. Nobody will ever know. But what we can assume is that at some point he realised he wasn't getting anywhere near it, and possibly also knew it was heading in the direction of his hand. Doesn't need to deliberately handle it, just deliberately position his forearm in a manner that will ensure the ball moves towards the goal. If he moves his hand outta the way it hits his hip and goes who knows where. But he didn't, he tucked his arm into his body. Watch the replay again. I've watched it, thanks. Looks like a Tyrannosaurus playing volletball.

It was as canny as waiting for a touch in the box. So yeah, great goal, triffic player.

That is quite clear, thanks. But did he mean to handle it? I would say no, therefore not a handball. Nobody will ever know. But what we can assume is that at some point he realised he wasn't getting anywhere near it, and possibly also knew it was heading in the direction of his hand. Doesn't need to deliberately handle it, just deliberately position his forearm in a manner that will ensure the ball moves towards the goal. If he moves his hand outta the way it hits his hip and goes who knows where.

What did he mean to do? Because he failed miserably. Head it into the net? His head is 3 feet from the ball.

What did he mean to do? Because he failed miserably.

No way Llorrente deserves to be credited with a goal for that.

No.

Don't do it to yourself . I have to. Until the fat cunt is gone I can't enjoy anything about the club. Short lived moments are all there are. I want to have hope again.

I don't think he'll get much change out of Van Dijk.

Still hoping the fat cunt will sell. Clinging to the possibility that he has taken Rafa's blueprint to prospective buyers and they've bitten his hand off.

In Ashley's case we're selling the horse before selling the cart.

Nicky Butt arrested in relation to a domestic incident.

Provided an assist for Carroll's hat-trick vs Villa

Still working with a League 2 squad and budget though apparently Must be the most expensive League 2 squad of all time. Eddie Howe the miracle worker Link? You not hear how our pundits talk about him? Eddie Howe is the only manager in the Premier League that can go 10 away losses in 11 games and still be talked about as if he is the dog’s bollocks. Kinda because he's managed to get a team who where close to being relegated from the Football League to a mid-table respectable Premier League side within 8 seasons. Yeah he did great in the lower leagues. But with what he has spent during being in the Premier League he isn’t performing the miracle every season that the pundits continuously make out. I'm not sure, mind. You have to spend what you earn, just to stand still, these days. And then there is no guarantee.