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Embarrassing Moments


Keefaz
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Had two embarrassing handshakes today. Two! First one, a guy went for a handshake and then at the last moment he pulled away a bit so I was left holding just the tips of his fingers. Second one was even worse: guy put his hand out for a regular handshake. At the last minute he obviously changes his mind and goes for a more macho arm wrestling type of urban hand thing so he was left holding my hand like a dead fish.

 

Edit: Also, I should point out the second guy was a black man. So, for a moment it was like I'd been invited to join the urban brotherhood and then humiliated myself at the first step.

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Also, a girl at work told me she went to the supermarket and she saw a fellow co-worker there and decided it would be a chortle to run up and slap his arse. He turns around and it's some creepy weirdo who winks at her and goes, "Alright?"

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Running out of petrol in the middle of a KFC drive thru.

 

Just abandoned me car and walked home, had to get me da to drive me to petrol station to fill up a little drum.  Then back to KFC and had to stand there filling it up.  Needless to stay I sped off without ordering anything.

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Found this out just tonight. We've had a number of Europeans staying in the hotel at the minute; separate parties like. I knew there was some Italian people staying and some French people as well. I work in the kitchen so only see the residents in passing, and as it happens, i've had the two completely mixed up and been greeting them with their opposing 'hellos' for the past fortnight. D'oh.

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Also, a girl at work told me she went to the supermarket and she saw a fellow co-worker there and decided it would be a chortle to run up and slap his arse. He turns around and it's some creepy weirdo who winks at her and goes, "Alright?"

 

I'd have taken the punt and done the same tbh.

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Still getting people's names wrong at college on the last day. (today) Genuinely just don't care enough about these people to make the effort to remember, still a bit embarrassing when I display it out loud. 

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Kept on fucking accidentally talking about cancer this one night when this lass was there whos Mam had recently died of cancer. I still want to kill myself everytime I think about that.

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Kept on fucking accidentally talking about cancer this one night when this lass was there whos Mam had recently died of cancer. I still want to kill myself everytime I think about that.

 

:lol: How do you accidentally keep dropping cancer into the conversation?

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I've just spazzed out when a massive moth flew into my room there, really can't stand being near them.

 

I am also pissed, which probably didn't help the situation, think I used about half a can of deodarant trying to calm the fucker down.

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Kept on fucking accidentally talking about cancer this one night when this lass was there whos Mam had recently died of cancer. I still want to kill myself everytime I think about that.

 

:lol: How do you accidentally keep dropping cancer into the conversation?

 

I really can't remember. I still feel so bad. I think all night I was thinking to myself "right, just don't mention cancer or death or anything like that" and I think it just kept fucking coming out of my mouth cos it's all that was on my mind. I really wish it had been me and not her Mam at the time.

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I've just spazzed out when a massive moth flew into my room there, really can't stand being near them.

 

I am also pissed, which probably didn't help the situation, think I used about half a can of deodarant trying to calm the fucker down.

 

:lol: I really wish I had the heart to kill the little fuckers like, can't stand them.

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I've just spazzed out when a massive moth flew into my room there, really can't stand being near them.

 

I am also p*ssed, which probably didn't help the situation, think I used about half a can of deodarant trying to calm the f***er down.

 

Don't blame you at all them bastards along with butterflies are truly awful. Give me spiders any day

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I've just spazzed out when a massive moth flew into my room there, really can't stand being near them.

 

I am also pissed, which probably didn't help the situation, think I used about half a can of deodarant trying to calm the fucker down.

 

:lol: I really wish I had the heart to kill the little fuckers like, can't stand them.

 

It's in me bin now, flew there of it's own accord, heard some flapping about going on, but that's subsided.

 

It may be dead now, or crippled, I can't see it. I should probably just turn my light and telly off really, that would confuse the cunt.

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When I was trying to get into a paternoster lift at uni, I went for it a bit too late to the point that I had to stretch to get in. Then I heard a load rip noise...........turns out I ripped my jeans around the crotch area, there was a lad in there too and I swear he heard the rip noise too.

 

Had to spend most of the day walking with my legs very close to each other (it was a huge rip!)

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Haha, standard. "I was such a cunt talking about cancer this one night. I'm a good guy though, honest - i leave fricking moths alone!"

 

Classic, VINTAGE, stuff from Barack.

 

You taking the piss? You can fuck off if you are like. :lol:

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:lol: :thup:

 

Bellend. Don't see what correlation those two posts have in the slightest. One embarrassing and albeit accidentally cuntish thing compared to not wanting to kill a moth for doing fuck all?

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Basically identical to BO's story. We were talking about the merits of being an only child on a night out not long ago, and I jokingly blurt out that I can't wait for my Mum and step Dad to snuff it, seeing as there's no one to share the inheritance with. (2 half brothers but they live away)

 

Remembered about 5 mins later one of the guys I was talking to lost his Dad to cancer a few months before. Just wanted to glass myself. He laughed along but he must have thought I was such a cunt.  :neutral:

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:lol: :thup:

 

Bellend. Don't see what correlation those two posts have in the slightest. One embarrassing and albeit accidentally cuntish thing compared to not wanting to kill a moth for doing fuck all?

 

They don't really, you touchy bastard. :razz: I'm only messing!

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