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Your pet hates


Yorkie
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I don't think anyone who hasn't had a cat could actually appreciate how good a pet they are, tbf. Other people's cats are not at all a reflection of your own. With cats being solitary creatures when they accept you in to their family their characters are fantastic. Hilarious a lot of the time. A lot of people think you can't connect with a cat as much as you can say a dog, but you can, it's just totally different. I love dogs too, fwiw. Love all animals, but I can't agree when people have beef with cats.

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People who just come over and start talking at you despite the fact you're very obviously busy and most probably don't care for what they're about to say, especially as it's not of any importance to anyone at all anyway. If I have two headphones in and am typing rather fast and looking stressed, why would you start talking at me? And get however many sentences through before I point out I can't even hear what you have to say, let alone don't f***ing want to?!

 

So f***ing presumptuous, man. Just think first.

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People who just come over and start talking at you despite the fact you're very obviously busy and most probably don't care for what they're about to say, especially as it's not of any importance to anyone at all anyway. If I have two headphones in and am typing rather fast and looking stressed, why would you start talking at me? And get however many sentences through before I point out I can't even hear what you have to say, let alone don't f***ing want to?!

 

So f***ing presumptuous, man. Just think first.

 

I'd been living with a lass for three or so months who'd sit next to me and stare at me with a smug smile until I asked her who the fuck she'd banged. Like I gave a shit.

 

I've never known a creature like her, mind, genuinely never met anyone like it. Everyone knows someone who simply talks about themselves - but not to this relentless degree. As the weeks passed I became convinced she actually had a screw loose. No one gave a shit about one single utterance she ever made (all about herself), yet she talked the most. She was a relatively advanced pole dancer, right, and also referred to herself 'The Unit Stripper' (the house was called the 'unit')... and one time I had a personal special occasion; her gift to me was two free pole dancing lessons. I fucking had them like but Jesus Christ I'd rather have had the pole inserted. The fact I was fucking class at it only made matters worse and she never let up after that. Everyone in the town knew I was a pole dancer now.

 

This is the same lass who plugged herself into someone else's gig and proceeded to sing Little Lion Man, flat as a fart. Think I mentioned it a while back.

 

I could go on about this girl. I genuinely, genuinely have never known anyone like it. She used to constantly walk around in just her bra and pants and, I mean, whilst she wasn't hideous to look at - she wasn't particularly attractive. I was sleeping mid-afternoon after a couple of mega-shifts and she just burst into my room in this bikini that was several sizes too small and did the aforementioned smile and stare until I said something. I made some daft wet dream joke to pacify her until she fucked off. Six hours later she was wandering around the unit still in this ridiculous two-piece.

 

Honestly, she was out of her mind. Even the dog hated her.

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At least the dog probably got his end away with her, unlike you by the sounds of it.

 

Don't get me wrong, I briefly considered it a couple of times - cos it was right there, all the time. But like I say. If you knew her...

 

Thing is too - you just know it would never get forgotten. One of my mates there had a lapse and went all the way with her; she predictably turned into a psycho and wouldn't leave him alone. Burst into his room whilst he was with his new girlfriend n everything.

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At least the dog probably got his end away with her, unlike you by the sounds of it.

 

Don't get me wrong, I briefly considered it a couple of times - cos it was right there, all the time. But like I say. If you knew her...

 

Thing is too - you just know it would never get forgotten. One of my mates there had a lapse and went all the way with her; she predictably turned into a psycho and wouldn't leave him alone. Burst into his room whilst he was with his new girlfriend n everything.

 

I only have this image now

 

http://media2.giphy.com/media/XNlRJn6zfzcGI/200_s.gif

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Guest firetotheworks

People talking about things like they've always been a thing. I've heard loads of people banging on about Michael Kors stuff as if they've always wanted it. Nar, it's overpriced and it's in town, therefore you now want it. See also, people jumping on the 'I've always wanted Dr Martens' bandwagon.

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