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women realy are off their tree-4 months on from my break up (quite boring mind!)


lovejoy
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well boys and girls, its been 4 months now, and my once stable, adult 4 year relationship has descended into a primary school playground farce. it has now become laughable!

 

here's the update:

 

after we were seeing each other often etc etc and i asked what was going on, she said she wasnt ready to give the relationship her whole heart yet, i simply told her to leave me alone, no contact, no nowt, just do one. (that was 6 weeks or so ago and i believe i posted that chapter up on here)

 

so...3 weeks passed and she had sent me a few heartfelt messages, which i had ignored, she then called round to say that she still loved me, and deep down knew she always had, she just needed the time apart to get her head right, some time alone. i accepted this but told her that i hadnt done anything wrong and had been made to feel like i'd had an affair or something, and i hadn't even touched on what i wasnt happy with in the relationship, so i reeled it off and told her to go away and think about what i had said because i wasnt messing about if we got back.

 

so..the next week, she came round, we slept togther and have spent pretty much every day togther since, prompting me to ask what is going on, i need a label on things, are we dating? taking things slowly?? what??? she said she was 90% sure she wanted to get back, was in love with me, but did not want to get back fully unless she was 100%, Q me going mad and slating her for messing me around, why call around and say what you have said and 3 weeks later you still dont know fully?? i have told her i am moving back to newcastle in 2 weeks, so im just starting to get packed up etc today.

 

such a shame for someone to supposedly be 90% sure, and in love with me, and we are going to lose that for good now, but tough shit eh, let her live with it!

 

 

conclusion - women are mad. :thup:

 

 

saddest thing is i held her in the highest esteem, and had the upmost respect for the girl, and a lot of that is gone now, how can i respect someone who doesnt know her own mind??? its been almost 4 months man, and you finished it, let go for christ sake, its over woman! it feels llike i finished her!

 

 

they are all mad! bluebiggrin.gif bluebiggrin.gif

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Guest Gemmill

Hump and Dump mate ;)

 

I'm sure I saw you on Saturday - big lanky gangly freak with a blonde lass?  bluebigrazz.gif

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Lovejoy mate i honestly think you should have an official thread and put all of the official goings on into it, piece by piece ;)

 

http://news.bbc.co.uk/olmedia/615000/images/_618119_lovejoy150.jpg

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Guest smoggeordie

Hump and Dump mate ;)

 

I'm sure I saw you on Saturday - Tall, cool looking, nifty bloke with a blonde lass? bluebigrazz.gif

 

Haha, could quite easily have been me. When and where?

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Lovejoy mate i honestly think you should have an official thread and put all of the official goings on into it, piece by piece ;)

 

http://news.bbc.co.uk/olmedia/615000/images/_618119_lovejoy150.jpg

 

i dont want eastenders to lose all of their viewers though mate! because thats inevitably what would happen!

 

 

this break up has been the laongest and most weirdest in the world, known to man etc etc tbh!

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Exactly the same thing happened with my mate and his lass.

 

I was their best man last week.

 

The soppy bit of my speech (stolen from the interweb) was "Marriage isn't about finding someone you can live with, it's about finding someone you can't live without".

 

It seems she's learnt herself that lesson, the question is how did you find the last 6 weeks?

 

Were you always hoping she'd come running back or were you loving the freedom?

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Guest Gemmill

Hump and Dump mate ;)

 

I'm sure I saw you on Saturday - Tall, cool looking, nifty bloke with a blonde lass? bluebigrazz.gif

 

Haha, could quite easily have been me. When and where?

 

On the metro heading into town.  Can't remember whether it was 11ish when I first went into town or 4ish the second time. 

 

PS.  Lovejoy, apologies for interrupting your thread.  Sounds like a shitty situation to be stuck in.  Hope things work themselves out for the best, whatever that turns out to be. :thup:

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Exactly the same thing happened with my mate and his lass.

 

I was their best man last week.

 

The soppy bit of my speech (stolen from the interweb) was "Marriage isn't about finding someone you can live with, it's about finding someone you can't live without".

 

It seems she's learnt herself that lesson, the question is how did you find the last 6 weeks?

 

Were you always hoping she'd come running back or were you loving the freedom?

 

 

quite pathetic really, but i was always hoping she would come back.

 

 

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Hump and Dump mate ;)

 

I'm sure I saw you on Saturday - Tall, cool looking, nifty bloke with a blonde lass? bluebigrazz.gif

 

Haha, could quite easily have been me. When and where?

 

On the metro heading into town.  Can't remember whether it was 11ish when I first went into town or 4ish the second time. 

 

PS.  Lovejoy, apologies for interrupting your thread.  Sounds like a shitty situation to be stuck in.  Hope things work themselves out for the best, whatever that turns out to be. :thup:

 

nee bother, thanks mate :thup:

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Guest smoggeordie

Hump and Dump mate ;)

 

I'm sure I saw you on Saturday - Tall, cool looking, nifty bloke with a blonde lass? bluebigrazz.gif

 

Haha, could quite easily have been me. When and where?

 

On the metro heading into town. Can't remember whether it was 11ish when I first went into town or 4ish the second time.

 

PS. Lovejoy, apologies for interrupting your thread. Sounds like a shitty situation to be stuck in. Hope things work themselves out for the best, whatever that turns out to be. :thup:

 

11ish I went from Heworth to Mon, so it'll have been me. Why do none of you bitches say Hi? Too scared to approach a celeb? Were you one of the old gadgies at Heworth with the away top on? ;)

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Exactly the same thing happened with my mate and his lass.

 

I was their best man last week.

 

The soppy bit of my speech (stolen from the interweb) was "Marriage isn't about finding someone you can live with, it's about finding someone you can't live without".

 

It seems she's learnt herself that lesson, the question is how did you find the last 6 weeks?

 

Were you always hoping she'd come running back or were you loving the freedom?

 

 

quite pathetic really, but i was always hoping she would come back.

 

 

Well there you go then.  This whole thing was a positive.

 

As shitty as it's been to go through, you've survived the relationship test and both know what you want.

 

Has she been in many relationships?  It's difficult to be certain if not.  I wouldn't be too harsh on her.

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Exactly the same thing happened with my mate and his lass.

 

I was their best man last week.

 

The soppy bit of my speech (stolen from the interweb) was "Marriage isn't about finding someone you can live with, it's about finding someone you can't live without".

 

It seems she's learnt herself that lesson, the question is how did you find the last 6 weeks?

 

Were you always hoping she'd come running back or were you loving the freedom?

 

 

quite pathetic really, but i was always hoping she would come back.

 

 

Well there you go then.  This whole thing was a positive.

 

As shitty as it's been to go through, you've survived the relationship test and both know what you want.

 

Has she been in many relationships?  It's difficult to be certain if not.  I wouldn't be too harsh on her.

 

she has been in a couple, but always says that she has never ever felt like this about anyone before so its all new to her really, when she has ended one in the past, she knew exactly what she was doing.

 

its this 90% sure bollocks i cant understand, hw long am i supposed to wait until she is 100% like?? thats why i sacked it all off tbh.

 

i will be back in toon in 2 weeks anyway, so it seems doomed really, unless there is a big turnaround by her in that space of time

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.....and no one can ever be 100%. Tell her to grow up.

 

i did, there are never any guarantees with this kind of thing, and therefore no-one is ever 100%.

 

i called her a fucking child and said that she was an idiot, and i stand by that.

 

 

harsh, but fair imo

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I think that is the best default postion with wimin anyway. bluewink.gif

 

 

fucking right it is!

 

 

she has text me today saying that she deserved everything i said bluebiggrin.gif

 

 

 

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Similar thing happening with me.  So it seems that girls worldwide are the same.  We had been dating for 3 1/2 years and moving forward, then all of a sudden she says that she needs time to figure herself out and make sure that what we have is what she really wants.  That was a few months ago, we spent the first couple of months still hanging out, still talking almost everyday now we talk a bit less and spend more time on our own.  She still calls and sends me texts, asking about my family, telling me how she misses me, but that us missing each other isn't what its about.  Have no idea what to do, went on a date a week back, but it didn't feel right.  Oh well.  I feel for you brother.

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Similar thing happening with me.  So it seems that girls worldwide are the same.  We had been dating for 3 1/2 years and moving forward, then all of a sudden she says that she needs time to figure herself out and make sure that what we have is what she really wants.  That was a few months ago, we spent the first couple of months still hanging out, still talking almost everyday now we talk a bit less and spend more time on our own.  She still calls and sends me texts, asking about my family, telling me how she misses me, but that us missing each other isn't what its about.  Have no idea what to do, went on a date a week back, but it didn't feel right.  Oh well.  I feel for you brother.

 

 

aye its a nightmare isnt it mate, my advice to you, take control, it took me far too long to do that, and once you do, its a lot better.

 

you should tell her 'in or out' either we get back or i think we should leave things. and stop everything dead. texts, calls, visits the lot. thats the only way you will both find out.

 

do you think you will get back on or what? have you slept with her since? (you dont have to answer that last really personal one if you dont want to)

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Similar thing happening with me.  So it seems that girls worldwide are the same.  We had been dating for 3 1/2 years and moving forward, then all of a sudden she says that she needs time to figure herself out and make sure that what we have is what she really wants.  That was a few months ago, we spent the first couple of months still hanging out, still talking almost everyday now we talk a bit less and spend more time on our own.  She still calls and sends me texts, asking about my family, telling me how she misses me, but that us missing each other isn't what its about.  Have no idea what to do, went on a date a week back, but it didn't feel right.  Oh well.  I feel for you brother.

 

 

aye its a nightmare isnt it mate, my advice to you, take control, it took me far too long to do that, and once you do, its a lot better.

 

you should tell her 'in or out' either we get back or i think we should leave things. and stop everything dead. texts, calls, visits the lot. thats the only way you will both find out.

 

do you think you will get back on or what? have you slept with her since? (you dont have to answer that last really personal one if you dont want to)

 

.... but we'd all like you to anyway

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Similar thing happening with me.  So it seems that girls worldwide are the same.  We had been dating for 3 1/2 years and moving forward, then all of a sudden she says that she needs time to figure herself out and make sure that what we have is what she really wants.  That was a few months ago, we spent the first couple of months still hanging out, still talking almost everyday now we talk a bit less and spend more time on our own.  She still calls and sends me texts, asking about my family, telling me how she misses me, but that us missing each other isn't what its about.  Have no idea what to do, went on a date a week back, but it didn't feel right.  Oh well.  I feel for you brother.

 

 

aye its a nightmare isnt it mate, my advice to you, take control, it took me far too long to do that, and once you do, its a lot better.

 

you should tell her 'in or out' either we get back or i think we should leave things. and stop everything dead. texts, calls, visits the lot. thats the only way you will both find out.

 

do you think you will get back on or what? have you slept with her since? (you dont have to answer that last really personal one if you dont want to)

 

.... but we'd all like you to anyway

 

 

:thup:

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Thanks for the advice.  Certainly sucks.  I think we might get back together, not sure right now though.  Seems like it would be later rather than sooner.  I've been taking control more lately.  Just don't understand the entire in-between thing.  We slept together a few times since, but not for a little while now.

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Guest Howaythetoon

I would cut my losses if that were me in your place Lovejoy mate because in my experience, you'll end up with an off off relationship which is probably the worst as it just fucks you up on all levels.

 

If you really really love her though, well, love hurts so...

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Aye, been there...hurts like buggery, but I'd agree with Grass on this one blueyes.gif - for the sake of your own sanity, sometimes the only thing you can do is just walk away. It's a dilemma - on one hand you're aware that "true love never runs smooth" but that doesn't help much when you give in to the nagging doubts that you will certainly have.

 

Lovejoy - if you're moving back to the Toon then will you cut all ties with her, or will you leave the door open for her, just in case?

 

Whatever you decide, I hope it all works out for the best! :thup:

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