Swissmag

I don't know where these guys will finish in terms of league position, but they should be capable of making me want to watch football again.

Surely MOTD will benefit from his unique perspective.

 

http://i.imgur.com/Ala2F5Z.jpg

What an idiot!

#NUFC will tomorrow officially sign Chancel Mbemba, before loaning him back to Anderlecht for the season.

 

of course

I hope to god that's not true.

Of course it is...but we're getting Abdennour on loan from Barca :-)

We didn't let him leave actually, we actively forced him out of the club against his own wishes.

 

Much worse.

£18m would be a great price for him imho.

So central defender from Bundesliga worth £5m or just over.  Any guesses?

 

Why just over £5m?

 

Douglas info is that we are to expect one more signing over 10m and the remainder will be around the 5m mark

 

He doesnt say that though, just says one could be eight figures. How do you know that isnt the CB?

has to be Abdennour :-)

Shaqiri and Abdennour and would be our greatest summer in an eternity. (in addition to finalizing Mbemba)

 

In an ideal world we sign that Dutch winger fella for cheap, Shaq, and Abdennour.

 

This 100%

Swissmag, do you only ever post when you feel you want to take offence to something for no reason other than "it's not quite politcally correct"?

Now I got it...you were the "Mbemba...congo" guy. Now it's clear! Both politically uncorrect, but that's it.

Swissmag, do you only ever post when you feel you want to take offence to something for no reason other than "it's not quite politcally correct"?

Yes, I did. Not often, but yes I did. That's just the way I am... :-)

I know this should be in brain dead thread but twitter whore reckons we are waiting for double announcement with Mitrovic today.

 

Haven't see that reported elsewhere

We will see.

 

Is there any need for that, really?

 

Agreed. I'd have gone for slag myself.

I don't know why I quoted it as it was clear that this would be the reaction... :-(

I know this should be in brain dead thread but twitter whore reckons we are waiting for double announcement with Mitrovic today.

 

Haven't see that reported elsewhere

We will see.

 

Is there any need for that, really?

Not sure what could " really excite" me personally, probably a winger but having said that it's probably bollocks.

Abdennour? (I would be excited to say the least)

Um Bongo, Um Bongo, Mbemba drinks it in the Congo

Fucking hell!

Good stuff! Hopefully we'll get another CB in to partner him.

Abdennour hopefully (even though I am just dreaming)

I'd say spending over 10m on a triker under Ashley's era is a coup, but in general it's something we should expect year in year out considering the club's stature and resources. But who cares honestly, lets just hope he does well.

 

http://stream1.gifsoup.com/view2/3469687/drift-trike-o.gif

 

:-)

Whenever have these long drawn out sagas, you end up f***ing remembering these players for an eternity ie : Mel Edinc, Kevin Gameiro.

 

Clearly not

:-)

Sp. Anderlecht news ‏@Sporting_AND 1m1 minute ago

Aleksandar Mitrovic & Chancel Mbemba absent from Anderlecht training #rsca #nufc

 

On his way to Porto then.

It's okay (if it's only Mitrovic) if you ask me. Don't care that much about this guy but would love NUFC to get Mbemba.

Muzzi Ozcan ‏@Muzziozcan 9m9 minutes ago

 

Wish a successful career at his new team ( Charlie Austin )

36 retweets 19 favorites

 

Muzzi Ozcan ‏@Muzziozcan 7m7 minutes ago

 

Newcastle - Charlie Austin ??

 

 

This fella seems to be pretty well informed usually.

 

 

 

What's that little box all about after Newcastle - Charlie Austin?

 

A thumb up sign

Why doesn't Ashley just off Mitrovic's fatha? Problem solved.

 

I'd prefer that the other way around.

Good. We've got enough s*** haircuts in the team.

This tbh...now watch us go for Chamakh :-)

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/football/article-3074118/Newcastle-fastest-kamikaze-ride-world-people-hate-need-balls-steel-insists-Steven-Taylor.html

Newcastle are the fastest kamikaze ride in the world... people hate us but we need to show balls of steel, insists Steven Taylor

By CHRIS WHEELER FOR THE DAILY MAIL

 

PUBLISHED: 22:34, 8 May 2015 | UPDATED: 22:34, 8 May 2015

 

 

These are dark days for the Geordie Nation. Their beloved football team are sliding ever closer to relegation and desperate calls for Newcastle to be united again may have come too late.

 

There’s mutiny on the terraces, crisis meetings in the dressing room. A beleaguered interim boss accusing one of his players of getting himself sent off on purpose, and an open letter from the captain.

 

Even by Newcastle’s soap opera standards, it has been quite a week.

 

As it draws to a close, John Carver must sift through the remnants of a squad ravaged by suspension and injury to field a team capable of beating West Bromwich Albion at St James’ Park, the first of three games that will decide Newcastle’s fate. They have lost their last eight.

 

Carver needs the Toon Army marching in the same direction again. The club have called for it, captain Fabricio Coloccini has called for it, even former chairman Sir John Hall has called for it.

 

Sitting in a hotel by the city’s bustling Quayside, no-one articulates it quite like Steven Taylor.

 

Newcastle’s longest-serving player has been at his hometown club since the age of nine. By 14, he had graduated from ball boy to what they called match duty. ‘Going in the dressing-room and cleaning all the spit off the floor,’ says the 29-year-old defender. ‘Happy days. I even kissed the boots of some players when no one was around.’

 

His passion is evident. So is the pain. Taylor has watched his club’s decline helplessly since rupturing an Achilles tendon on New Year’s Day, but remains a key figure in the dressing room and one of the senior players responsible for calling Monday’s crisis meeting at the training ground, 48 hours after a crushing defeat at Leicester left Newcastle two points above the danger zone.

 

‘It was in the dressing-room,’ says Taylor. ‘Locked doors, now everybody listen. It came between the players. We were the ones who wanted to call a meeting. We’re the ones in the s**t. We know we’re not winning games, it doesn’t need Einstein to tell us that. Eight games on the bounce? If the alarm bells aren’t ringing then you’re in the wrong job.

 

‘It was fantastic to hear everyone’s opinion. Not just one or two. Everyone. It needed that. Players said, “Ask me to play here or there and I will”. When we went down last time (in 2009) too many of them had moves lined up months in advance.

 

‘But who’s going to want you if we get relegated? You’re going to be here. Pull your finger out. We’re all in it together. If we weren’t, we’d crumble.

 

‘It’s horrible to think about relegation when we were talking about Europe not so long ago. But these three games (against West Brom, QPR and West Ham) are probably the biggest games of these lads’ careers.’

 

Taylor knows what it’s like to inhabit the goldfish bowl of Newcastle. ‘A bubble, like Big Brother,’ is how he describes it. He knows what it’s like when things are going well, and how quickly it can all turn.

 

‘I call us the fastest kamikaze ride you can find in the world. At the top it’s the best feeling, unbelievable. Halfway down you think, “what’s going on here?” And as you hit that bottom bit, that’s the worst you can feel.

 

‘Newcastle is a football city, you can’t hide away from it. Nobody has anything else to talk about apart from football.

 

‘There are that many glory supporters down in London but they’re diehard here. You see fans with their tops off when it’s freezing cold, nipples like ice cubes.

 

‘I’ll tell you what, if anyone out-sings our fans I’ll show my backside in Fenwick’s window on Northumberland Street. It’s impossible.

 

‘We flippin’ love it at Newcastle but we need to give them something to shout about. We need to give them back their mojo.

 

‘At the moment we’re sending them home with faces like slapped backsides and it’s horrible to see that.

 

‘When you win they go home to their missus happy as Larry. We get beat and they’re a nightmare. I can guarantee you they will go home and be horrible around the house, causing arguments because of us. We probably cause divorces.

 

‘A lot of people think we don’t know about this. We talk about it. We impact it.’

 

Equally, however, Taylor has seen first-hand what effect the fans’ demonstrations and the poisonous mood within St James’ Park has had on some of his team-mates.

 

‘They’d rather get a takeaway than eat at a restaurant because they’re waiting for the next one,’ says Taylor. ‘Some of the lads are driving with their missus to go shopping and fans are pulling alongside, sticking their fingers up at them and making rude gestures.

 

‘Certain people hate us, say we’re rubbish. We’ve been called an embarrassment, not good enough. Worst team Newcastle have ever had. We’re getting hammered in the media, hammered in our cars. We get reminded every 10 seconds. People shouting, “You’re crap, you’re s***e”. When the lads see that every week, it does hurt. They don’t bring their families to the game now because it’s got that bad.

 

‘It has an effect on the foreign lads who are getting hammered and it’s horrible seeing them in that situation. They come to training and their heads are down. Their confidence is the lowest in their whole career, I reckon. They can’t get any lower.

 

‘It’s a reality shock for these foreign players but not for me. Nine out of 10 Geordies will hammer them because they’re so passionate.

 

‘It’s part and parcel of playing for Newcastle United. You’re in the public eye. You’re a sitting duck.

 

‘At the moment you need balls of steel. If you haven’t, then grow some. But the lads have got the b*****ks. I wish we could have affected it two months ago. Now it’s got to a stage where we didn’t expect it.

 

‘We’re against a proportion of our fans at the moment. The Gallowgate, the East Stand, Sir John Hall Stand, the Milburn Stand, they all see the game differently.

 

‘But when we play at home now, for some of the lads we’ve talked about, so many people there are waiting for something bad to happen.

 

‘You imagine playing in front of 52,000 and the same minority hammering the same players each week.

 

‘I speak to opposition players after the game and they all say the exact same thing: get to half-time or 60 minutes and if Newcastle haven’t scored, their fans will turn.

 

‘Nothing about our players or stopping our game plan. If they hear boos at half-time, that’s what they want. Afterwards they’re laughing. Fans might read this and think it’s not going to get us three points. But what are you going to do? Hammer us for 90 minutes?

 

‘The majority of fans are unbelievable, but there’s a section who say we’re crap. We need them more than anything now. Stick with us. Three games to go.’

 

Carver emerged in defiant mood on Thursday after the events of last weekend when he accused Mike Williamson of getting himself sent off, and then learned that Newcastle had made an unsuccessful attempt to hire Derby boss Steve McClaren for the last three games of the season.

 

But Taylor admitted that the interim boss, who has up to 10 players out injured and another two suspended this weekend, has been feeling the strain.

 

‘JC’s the main Geordie about the place,’ he says. ‘His voice is like (the) Ultimate Warrior. He’s got that growl and when you hear it you think, “Bloody hell, he’s going mad”.

 

‘But after the Sunderland game I saw him on the Monday and it looked like he’d aged. He was devastated. It was like he hadn’t slept for a few days. It’s horrible seeing someone like that because he’s one of the fans.

 

‘He hasn’t had the players to play a full-strength team. What can he do this weekend? (Jose) Mourinho or (Sir Alex) Ferguson couldn’t do anything different.’

 

It was 60 years ago this week that Newcastle won their last major domestic trophy when the legendary Jackie Milburn scored after 45 seconds in a 3-1 FA Cup final win over Manchester City at Wembley.

 

A statue of ‘Wor Jackie — Footballer and Gentleman’ stands outside the Gallowgate End, just a few yards from a similar tribute to Sir Bobby Robson.

 

Memories of Newcastle’s proud past are all around St James’ Park. By the door of The Strawberry pub is a flyer advertising an audience with Philippe Albert, a hero of the Kevin Keegan years, in Dunston on June 19.

 

Opposite is a banner for the North East Comedy Festival next month. The black humour will not be lost on seasoned observers of Newcastle United.

What a brainless idiot!!!

Would love that. But isn't he on his way to Schalke? No?

Apparentely they need to sell first because the need more money. Might free up that Matip bloke.

I'm not complaining. I just think there are players of similar quality, or who could be better in time, in Holland available for less. Doesn't mean I'm not really happy about this deal provided we follow it up by bringing in at the very least a striker and a centre back.

 

You sound like a woman.

 

'When do you ever take me out'

 

Gets taking out

 

'Babe, this is too expensive, we should have went to Nandos and Cinema'

seems like his nickname suits him... :-)

f***ing gutted if this happens man

 

Why? Some absolute w***** is joining another w***** at a w*** club. It will end in tears. Cause for celebration tbh.

This tbh

 

 

Then stop f***ing spouting off stats that don't mean s***

But he doesn't lose the ball that often. Abeid under Carver was much worse for that. People here just spout any crap. I provide logic.

 

If you think Tiote doesn't lose the ball often, your logic is as sound as your opinion of Cabella's towering height.

 

Tiote - 81.7

Anita - 81.1

 

 

He might lose the ball more times a match due to having the ball more. But he doesn't lose it more often.

 

Is that pass completion?  Does that include all the times he holds on to the ball, spins around a bit beofre being tackled?

 

rates are similar. Tiote gets dispossesed once on average per 90 minutes. Anita 0.8.

 

Tiote gets "fouled" a lot when he fannies on the ball. And he must make some passes under extreme pressure that don't help build a rhythm.

 

But Tiote losing the ball often? Myth.

 

f***ing stats man, just watch the f***ing matches for once and you'll see Anita taking the more ambitious pass and you'll see Tiote passing backwards. See Tiote comit a foul or be out a position and you'll see us having already lost the central battle. You'll also see us being prone to cards and giving away key free kicks that force danger situations in our own half. He hasn't been himself since the first two seasons we had him and it's a another Alan Pardew ruined career.

 

Howay man, forget what you see with the naked eye; his stats are very good.

it's all about stats if you ask me ;-)