If

[Guest smoggeordie]

(Nicked from True Faith)

 

If you can keep your head when all those about you

Are losing theirs and blaming Sir Bob;

if you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,

But still give ear to the faint-hearted slob:

If you can wait for trophies and not end up bleating,

Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies,

Or being cheated against don't give in to cheating,

And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise.

 

If you can dream and not make dreams your master;

If you can drink and not make oblivion your aim,

If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster

And treat these two imposters just the same:

If you can bear to see the team, you've supported

Outplayed by Knaves and made to look like fools,

Or watch the hopes you've given your life to, thwarted,

And stoop and build'em up with worn-out tools.

 

If you can make one heap of all your winnings

And risk it one penalty kick,

And lose, and start again at your beginnings,

And never shout "Oh, you stupid prick!":

If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew

To serve your turn long after they are gone,

And so hold on when there is nothing in you

Except the Will which says to them: "Play on!"

 

If you can sing with crowds and keep your virtue,

Or drink with Ambassadors nor lose the common touch,

If neither Mackems nor loving friends can hurt you,

If all fans count with you, but none too much:

If you can fill the extra-time minute

With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,

Yours is the Premiership and all that comes with it,

And what is more you'll be a Geordie, my son!

[Ashley17]

If you do X, Y and Z, Bob's your uncle [/Partridge]

[Guest Invicta_Toon]

If  .....    ever there was ever a poem not deserving of being associated with NUFC, it's that one

[Guest alex]

Rudyard Kipling turning in his grave tbh.

[Cajun]

Rudyard Kipling turning in his grave tbh.

 

He's dead? Who is going to make all the cakes!!

 

 

 

 

[Ronaldo]

If you do X, Y and Z, Bob's your uncle [/Partridge]

 

classic partridge that

[Guest alex]

Rudyard Kipling turning in his grave tbh.

 

He's dead? Who is going to make all the cakes!!

 

 

 

 

Exceedingly bad

[Guest smoggeordie]