Mike

Just cut the doctors hair, god damn. Is this really happening? They want him?

Some smoke, nothing official. Everton fans saying he's had/having a medical and .com says that journalists in Liverpool say the deal is done.

Thought track and field was big business on your side of the pond. Don't think anyone competing is starving.

Is Carroll good enough to step up, or should he going out on loan again?

Man, I don't even want to do that, I'm fucking dying to be that maudlin soothsayer that tells them what's coming.

http://nsno.co.uk/e107_plugins/forum/forum_viewtopic.php?528313 This is a fantastic read so far. They're slowly talking themselves into it. Someone mentioned Smith being able to keep Cahill "on his toes" I'll be goddamned if they don't know what's coming.

This is what you do. You match the Everton offer and sell them Smith. Fuck, pay them to take the guy if needed. After Smudge passes a medical (shit players never fail them, do they?), you surreptitiously slip Moutinho a highlights package of Smith over the past year. Use Yakety Sax and wacky sound effects. Include a card with the Portuguese equivalent of "You're going to do all that work in midfield just to pass the ball to him?"

Selling them Smith is the hijack.

Moutinho and Smith. That's almost like making no signings at all. I mean...wow, what a summer! Two possible captains!

Alan Smith should be captain, gutted to see him go.

Good, good! If there are pages and pages of argument, Everton moles will believe we want to keep him.

http://newsimg.bbc.co.uk/media/images/44896000/jpg/_44896207_jonescredit.jpg One for one swap with Smith.

I'm not stepping on cracks, I'm not looking at face down coins, I'll kill a black cat before I let it cross me. I'm on eggshells over this.

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Who is on the bench?

That's a damn fine cross.

Stop posting rumours.

Geremi corners, Duff beating a man, Enrique starting at LB. This game...

Fucking Smith!

Taylor.

Wait. Did we score on a set piece? A Geremi corner that passed the first man? What?

There is a decent part of me that wants to register at the everton forum and explain the nature of the storm headed their way.

Agree with the people saying he should be captain.

He hasn't even left yet! These are still unconfirmed rumours at the moment. I was still dreaming, my fault. Smith 08-09: Five goals for us, or at least one goal against us.

I'm calling it now. Smith will score at least one goal against us. You can't feel it coming?