Keefaz

It's Ronaldinho!

Christ. Some of the mods are slacking today.

I think I've made my point. He has some attributes I admire but also some problems in his game particularly in awareness, touch, and decision-making. I'm not pointing out these flaws because he was not born within earshot of St. Nicholas' Cathedral, but simply because they exist. I think he's a good player and offers a lot to the team, for what it's worth, but whether it makes sense to re-negotiate his contract now is a different matter entirely.

Well your last reply was: Not really sure how you want me to respond to that tbh. 'Yes, Keefaz, I quite agree. I was completely wrong. The reason Martins is criticised isn't because he's foreign but because he has obvious, severe flaws in his game. You rock.'

When a player's active or not, whether an attacker is onside if there's 'no daylight', um... that's about it.

Does anyone else think Big TRon is smoking crack? As far as I can tell he's reading replies that aren't actually there.

No you pleb. He scores goals and makes them. Which is why he might be getting a new contract like it or not. Did you enjoy the first touch which smacked the ball bast the Celtic keeper? You asked if he'd get stick if he was a Geordie with the touch of a rapist and the answer's obviously yes, although we'll never find out as there isn't anyone in the whole of North Tyneside with a first touch as bad as Oba's.

Yes, you spaz. He's got a fucking atrocious first touch for a top-flight striker brought up on the continent. It is unusual.

Surely you don't have to spunk €20m to win the Ukrainian league, though.

Who would want to sign for Shaktar? I mean cmon! Most people don't even know which country that's in!! Btw, nice unibrow... How is this possible? €20m? Shakhtar?

He is a real player. In fact, I'd say he was a 'proper player'.

If true? The conspiracy theory starts here.

'Have you tried a Brown Ale?' 'Have you been down the Bigg Market?' 'What do you think about our new shirts?' 'D'ya have a stottie at half-time, Sam?' 'What do you think of the fans?'

I'd be gutted. I'd be fucking apoplectic with rage if he went for £3m.

Best propaganda campaign since Goebbels, the papers this summer.

Zog is quick. Quick as fuck? Nope. Not in the Bellamy, Dyer league at all. Possibly not, but they're the two quickest players we've probably ever had! Very quick, all the same. Think Sam'll want to keep pace, anyway.

Left wing. He'll move into the middle eventually, but he isn't up to it at the minute, imo.

Zog is quick as fuck. What you on about? Edit: I think Allardyce is as keen on counter-attacking football as anyone we've had going by the pre-season matches I've seen.

It could've been any bloody Boateng, it was a load of shite.

Aye, something the Indy are conveniently forgetting... Unless we're happy to except less than £13 million for him. Also I'd say there's a chance his clause had a cut off date similar to Owen's. I'd say there's a good chance, an all. Not that Big Sam'd know, anyway.

Utter, utter, utter bollocks.

I hadn't noticed tbh. I just love the Fishster. 'Hadn't noticed'! Goddamn copycat. Except it back-fired. Everyone else have foxy mommas and you have a blatant paedo-a-like.

We need a RB, we don't Glen Johnson though, that'll only make things worse. Christ. Your weathergirl's a proper minger.

Surprised this comparison hasn't been made yet. Very similar in terms of playing style ('lazy') and NUFC career.

Used to know a drummer in a local death metal band who had a summer job dressing up as furry seal at the Sea Life Centre in Tynemouth.