brummie

I'm not sure he'll give too much of a fuck about that, he's just qualified for the Champions League (twice over) for the second time in three years, having missed out on goal difference the other year in which we got to the QF and beat the eventual winners at home and came within a gnat's chuff of knocking the cunts out, and has just won a European trophy, having picked up a side fighting relegation when he arrived. I don't think he'll be worrying too much about these details. We've done incredibly well despite our transfer policy, not because of it. We've sacked Monchi and moved him on because, everything we've done, has been despite the fact that last summer our big signing was Guessand (punted to Palace on loan in January), Abraham (swapped for Malen who then went on a massive scoring spree for Roma), and Elliot (not even seen the pitch let alone got on it because of some contractual fuck up). If Emery gets an actual well formed, sensible transfer policy, he'll do even better than he has so far. I don't really have an opinion one way or the other about Barnes, but genuinely, whilst i'd be surprised given his profile and age, it's not exactly 'irresponsible' is it?

Jesus Fucking Christ, that looks truly awful, like it's designed by someone who doesn't even understand the basics of the club's visual identity. I wonder what our new shirt looks like. I think I'll google *googles* I'm back

Two things wrong with that clip and one right. 1. Peter Drury - he ruins absolutely every match he commentates on. I pay for Sky Sports but I genuinely look for an international stream to watch purely because they don't have him with his ridiculous over the fucking top screaming players names any time they get within 20 yards of the opposition goal (obviously, that wasn't very often for Arsenal last night, so i kind of understand him screaming his way through their penalties) 2. Modern fans - your team is in a penalty shoot out in the Champions League final and you're fucking filming yourself with your back to it? I understand the 'can't watch' thing (the 2019 play off final, I couldn't watch the last ten minutes, it was so fucking stressful, even though i was actually at Wembley, I went down to the concourse and stared at the wall for ten minutes). However, filming yourself for instagram? Fuck off, and stay fucked off. 3. Arsenal - ha ha ha, cunts.

The only thing i hate almost as much as gloryhunters is non-standard fucking about penalty run-ups. They deserve a double ACL at the point of execution. Run up, kick the ball into the fucking net, or fuck off into the bin, you cunts.

Yeah he looks like he's permanently about to burst into tears.

Just realised - the winners of this get to play us in the Super Cup. COME ON YOU GUNNERS!

I hate that carpet-headed cunt so much.

I bet Budapest never thought they'd see something even more reprehensible than Orban so quickly.

Almost as good as a colonic irrigation with Vimto. Heaven.

Lovely seeing you in Istanbul, Toony. When you were haggling with that guy in the bazaar over a Sunderland-Villa half and half scarf, that was so funny.

Ha ha ha, that just made me snort gin and tonic.

The minute Arsenal scored this was going to happen.

We beat these cunts and almost knocked them out full stop. Arsenal absolutely will strangle this match to death, and we're then due a truly unbearable torrent of media love-in, and horrendous online Arsenal twats all fucking summer.

Indeed, plenty of high end restaurants and shops in Birmingham. Peterborough you're surrounded by people with facial tattoos, visible scars, twelve fingers, eyes so close together the right eye is in the left socket, and the left eye in the right, and family trees that look like stumps. On the bright side, if you find yourself in a passport renewal emergency, you're sorted.

Nah, it is ups and downs, you have to accept that it's not a direct diagonal top right line on a graph, you get setbacks. Missing out on CL on goal difference last season was a massive challenge point for us. That made a huge difference in our plans, so we've had to accept that as a knockback. There will be great seasons but there will also be iffy ones. We didn't get what we wanted last year, but on the positive side, we had a run to the CL QF, we beat Bayern and PSG at home (and came within a kick of knocking them out), but if you look in wider terms, the season was a set-back. We - you and us - moan that we're fighting a rigged system, and we genuinely are, we just need to accept that there are going to be setbacks, it's fucking difficult - if not impossible - to do what we are trying to do, and keep our nerve. And I say that as one who has been saying how amazing this season has been, whilst ignoring all the times during it where i wanted to throw myself off a motorway bridge because we'd put together a 7 match run of absolutely Wolves level.

it really isn’t, it’s a lots of ifs and buts and doomsday scenarios - the downside of having a world class coach is that he might leave? I’d suggest even that scenario works for us as Emery has coached highest level clubs before and it didn’t work out - mostly because to really do the best, he needs total control and absolute faith. Two things he won’t get at clubs like that. The fact is we’ve won a European trophy whilst finishing 4th and with almost the lowest net spend in the league and having to battle with unreasonable PSR. If that’s in some way foreboding then I don’t know how anyone is supposed to just enjoy football. We do need to reduce the average age of the squad and Monchi spent some money which didn’t work out (especially last summer and is gone as a result) Also worth noting though - sign Jhon Duran for 15m, get great things out of him but realise he’s a nutter so sell him shortly after and bank 50m profit and then watch him go on to deteriorate. Sign Rogers for 14m. How much is he worth now? And he’s basically had half a good season at best. We have exactly the same problem as you have had - owners with plenty of money and desire to spend it but hamstrung by a shit system designed to make it impossible to progress. I’m struggling to see how we could be in a better position right now given all the obstacles.

I like him but not that much. We also need to bring the squad age down. Isn’t he 29? Not sure that fits.

Shed a tear like a sad old cunt tonight. Fucking hell, at last, at fucking last. What an insane last 6 or 7 years. Just fucking nuts. I don't care what any cunt says, we've won another European trophy. I can barely believe it.

Confirmed.

ABSOLUTELY SHITTING FUCKING BRICKS. I can't enjoy this sort of shit. I need to get a low-stress hobby, like hard drugs or join the Ukrainian army.

Christ, what a TERRIBLE season.

Someone needs to turn the fucking internet off, ASAP.

This. It doesn't count, it has an asterisk next to it, like all their fraudulent silverware. *Clough face*

re being shit on occasions this season, this is correct and you won’t find a Villa fan that thinks otherwise. we didn’t score until about October and at the end put together a terrible run that included the spurs performance (as bad as anything under Gerrard, although I think Unai actually tactically played a blinder given what happened later that week), drawing at Burnley, getting beaten by Fulham, and Forest and scraping past Sunderland at home. Our last away performance that was even a decent performance was at your place. however, we also put together the best run, playing some superb football, in years. We are one of those sides that on our day, we are capable of beating anyone, but when off it we look truly awful. The one other thing we do well is managing Europe. I saw a graphic the other day that showed we’ve won something nuts like fifteen European home games in a row (inc PSG and Bayern), and the CL non qualification last year was goal difference. I think the reason we balance it so well is the manager has done it literally hundreds of times. Really in all this, Emery is excellent at managing across the whole 38 games but you are absolutely right, he’s streaky as a manager and this season in particular has been extreme - brilliant streaks but also some truly awful ones.

Where are you staying in Istanbul? Let's hook up for a few before the match and sing old Villa songs from the 80s. I know you still have that David Platt poster on your bedroom wall.