Llambliar talks with Auntie

[NG32]

New book out "How to rape a football club and make it look like an accident" By Mike Ashley.

[Thespence]

NAME OF THE GAME

 

Are the muppets@St James' Park trying to wind up Newcastle fans?

 

"The final insult" has been drafted and redrafted dozens of times since Mike Ashley climbed out of an Umbro bargain bin and bought the Toon. Within months Ashley had achieved the impossible – making Freddy Shepherd seem efficient, humble and successful.

 

Much like the career of Ricky Gervais, it was funny at first. But no one's laughing now. OK, Sunderland fans are still laughing. Hard. Their latest gag? Newcastle will be sponsored by Tyneside Waterpark next season. TW@ St James' Park. Those who speak text language can stop sniggering now.

 

Wigan owner Dave Whelan, Ashley's long-term rival in the Chav clothing market, will undoubtedly stick in a bid. And a whip-round on Wearside could yet see Sunderland fans buy the rights, allowing them to officially rename it Sid James' Park.

 

Impossible? You'd think so. But with Ashley and Derek Llambias at the wheel, anything is possible.

 

Llambias, Newcastle's chief executive, has in many ways, drawn the shortest straw in football. It is his job to explain Ashley's actions to Newcastle fans. You fancy that gig? But despite the impossibility of his position, Llambias gets zero sympathy. Which, judging by yesterday's interview with the BBC, is exactly what he deserves.

 

Not only did Llambias insult Newcastle's fans (average attendance this season 41,251) by saying: "You need to concentrate on supporting the team. You may not like the administration but we're here, we're investing. We've made mistakes in the past but we are doing our best. If you get behind our team, your team, it's necessary."

 

He also claimed that he had no idea what Ashley's intentions were: "He may want to take on a partner, I'm not sure – we've not had that conversation." Kind of makes you wonder what conversations they are having. Presumably, they just make bets about how useless Newcastle's players are; the kind of bets which, in the past, have led to Llambias sprinting naked across St James' Park. Excuse me, sprinting naked across the pitch at sportingdirect.com@St James' Park. Wouldn't want to put off any potential sponsors now, would we...

 

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/football/dailybung/6507531/Is-Mike-Ashley-trying-to-annoy-Newcastle-fans.html

[UV]

I'm curious as to where the 50% drop in turnover has come from. It doesn't add up to me.

 

In 07-08 turnover was around £100m, made up of 32.4 matchday, 41.1 media, 25.9 commercial. 08-09 had a turnover of £100m too, and the split will have been much the same. From this interview we know the media revenue this year will be around £15m (a reduction of £26m). Average attendance last year was 49k, this year it's 41k - a drop of 8k equates to around 16%, say a drop of £5-6m in matchday revenues. That still leaves around an £18m reduction in forecast turnover meaning we will only have £8m from commercial revenue? A 70% fall? That's massive even if we have been relegated and people are not buying merchandise in protest. Doesn't sound right to me. If it's true though it just shows how we as supporters CAN make a significant dent in Mike Ashley's pocket despite what the pathetic defeatists amongst us say about being powerless to do anything.

 

Additionally, I would have thought net income from player sales would count towards the turnover (perhaps someone like quayside could clear up whether this is true or not). In all previous years in recent history we have made a net loss on players trading (yes even under Ashley due to his pay up front but sell in instalments policy). This year we must have a significant net income from players sold - not only initial payments on players sold this Summer, but from instalments on the likes of Milner, Given, N'Zogbia, etc. Most if not all of the players bought last year were paid for up front (which is part of the reason the accounts look so bad and poor Mike had to "pour money in to keep us afloat") and so will not count against this income. Where is this money going if it is not going into the club's turnover figures?

[Mowen]

Don't you get paid a pretty hefty fee just for being in the premiership? Based on your finishing position or something? Also, matchday ticket prices have gone down so there will be a slight increase in the drop you've predicted there I guess.

 

Basically Llambitwat just plucked 50% out of the air though.

[UV]

Don't you get paid a pretty hefty fee just for being in the premiership? Based on your finishing position or something?

 

That's part of the "media" turnover.

 

Also, matchday ticket prices have gone down so there will be a slight increase in the drop you've predicted there I guess.

 

But 4 more league home games.

 

Basically Llambitwat just plucked 50% out of the air though.

 

Nearly spot on though.

[Mowen]

Don't you get paid a pretty hefty fee just for being in the premiership? Based on your finishing position or something?

 

That's part of the "media" turnover.

 

Right, with you, I thought the £26m was just TV appearance money - didn't realise it included that. Also forgot about the extra games also I'd be surprised if we make much less gate money for the cups than last time around. Huddersfield had more people in than Spurs last year and we only had a replay at home to hull in the FA.

[Dinho lad]

"We've had to move on since then and it's given us an opportunity to bring the wages down to an acceptable level in the Premier League, but not in the Championship.

 

goodbye enrique

goodbye taylor

goodbye gutierrez

 

 

[Interpolic]

Hopefully they'll make a canny whack off the film rights soon enough.

[Guest Roger Kint]

Don't you get paid a pretty hefty fee just for being in the premiership? Based on your finishing position or something?

 

That's part of the "media" turnover.

 

Right, with you, I thought the £26m was just TV appearance money - didn't realise it included that. Also forgot about the extra games also I'd be surprised if we make much less gate money for the cups than last time around. Huddersfield had more people in than Spurs last year and we only had a replay at home to hull in the FA.

 

Dont forget the sizable reducions in corporates this season, those empty seats represent 3/4/5 empty seats anywhere else in the ground

[Mowen]

Don't you get paid a pretty hefty fee just for being in the premiership? Based on your finishing position or something?

 

That's part of the "media" turnover.

 

Right, with you, I thought the £26m was just TV appearance money - didn't realise it included that. Also forgot about the extra games also I'd be surprised if we make much less gate money for the cups than last time around. Huddersfield had more people in than Spurs last year and we only had a replay at home to hull in the FA.

 

Dont forget the sizable reducions in corporates this season, those empty seats represent 3/4/5 empty seats anywhere else in the ground

 

That's a decent point actually, the cheaper seats are generally full, it's the more expensive ones that are empty. Still wouldn't make a huge difference to the figures UV is talking about with regards to revenue drop mind.

[Guest Roger Kint]

Are all the boxes in use? There would be a lot of money involved there if a few were vacant.

 

1000 Empty corporate seats each game is about £2m to £2,5m in revenue as the two big packages are £90 + VAT and £120 + Vat, not sure what figures we are getting but will all add up to a few quid i guess. Plus tickets are down in price this year all over the ground.