Sima

He was hopeless for them last season. Talented player who will get better. Well, he was hopeless and just about most mackems are glad to see the back of him. Not suited to the premiership as well. wat I think he means the other black one. They all look the same tbh

How many Champions League medals have they got? That's obviously the crucial factor tbh

No. £3m is peanuts. I'd possibly take £5m though.

themichaelowen michael owen Chinese, Indian or Pizza tonight? I'm siding with Indian. Anyone have any recommendations? I always get the same dish and fancy a change. Boring prick.

Just randomly searched for Iniesta's goal Vs Chelsea in 2009 Still absolutely hilarious tbh

Redknapp noting that Barcelona are a short side then trying to spin this in Man U's favour. Halfway through his point he realises they aren't the biggest either so reverts to saying they're good in the air.

Boutique football brand with Neil Warnock in charge

Dock the mackems a point tbh

Beckham tackling the pre-pubescent pitch invader

Phil Neville Would have been pretty epic for him to score there just to see Gary's reaction.

Does anyone want to pop over and mention we won the league that year? Doesn't matter apparently because the 9-1 will be remembered more. In direct contradiction to their patter now.

Does it say "Sad Geordies Bastards"?

It's basically one of their "daft mag at work" stories in visual form

I'm proper pissed off by this. Absolute disgrace.

What a load of shit. Ultimately it's still a good season but typical Newcastle kicking you in the balls when you are comfortable.

Booed off.

Mackems Top Dergs.

Jesus.

What a ball by Enrique.

Are our players wearing slippers?

I think Piers Morgan will definitely know who it is.

I see piers Morgan has randomly asked someone to get a better lawyer. That's it confirmed if there were any lingering doubts.

Motson so uninterested.

I want a replay of Sammy's appearance from at least 3 angles or I'm writing into Points of View.