brummie

I as just amazed to learn there is a midfielder you haven't already signed.

Wait until you get Man United in the third round of the FA Cup seven times in nine years, then you can talk about conspiracy. *shakes fist at the sky*

I imagine there to be a "star chamber" of Spurs ITKs, where five masked men sit around a table in a darkened room and deliver their verdicts on a given rumour. "Lordships, Anton Ferdinand is rumoured to be booked in for a medical, along with a 'swarthy gentleman who speaks French', how do you find on these issues?" *several minutes anxious silence* One by one the Star Chamber members solemnly pronounce their verdict, 3-2 in favour. "Release to the people the white smoke, a decision has been arrived at. Send our emissary to tell Glory Glory we are in agreement" "Supporters of Tottenham, go about the internet telling the supporters of other clubs our news, Ferdinand is ours. Add something about Newcastle offering him more money whilst you're at it. Mention Comoli a lot, too"

Depends on who you draw. I think we've got Odense from Denmark. Or Lisburn from Norn Iron.

He seemed to be able to cross alright at Villa the other year, for some reason. Yes, he did. I'd like to see him back - and if you took a poll of Villa fans, 90 percent would agree with me - to see if John Robertson could make him an even better crosser. How much do you reckon he is worth/would you be willing to pay? 5m or so. Liverpool have got a problem with the value of English midfielders at the moment, so they'll probably offer you a couple of players from the Merseyside Paper Boys XI and some scratchcards for him.

Does the Intertoto Cup for at least two matches (and only two if we don't sign some players beforehand) count as being "in Europe"?

He seemed to be able to cross alright at Villa the other year, for some reason. Yes, he did. I'd like to see him back - and if you took a poll of Villa fans, 90 percent would agree with me - to see if John Robertson could make him an even better crosser.

Steve Sidwell on the other hand is Cruyffian.

I love O'Neill. Admits it, but still sounds positive about it, and he clearly won't be fucked around. Incidentally, in January, Barry's agents were putting feelers out to Chelsea, and he looked like going there. Lineker is such a cunt trying to take the piss out of MON, mind. That comment about "do you need therapy, Martin" "I seek help from my friends, which means I wouldn't be calling any of you three" What a man.

England regular. Don't English players cost a lot of money? We've no need to sell and Liverpool have behaved disgracefully throughout this sage, so I suspect MON is determined to make it as difficult and expensive as he possibly can. I don't blame MON at all but I cannot see Pool bettering that offer, then its back down and sell him or put up with an unhappy player. If Carrick and Hargreaves are worth £18m then Barry is worth at least £20m in my view. I wouldn't say Barry is better than either of them, especially Carrick. Barry is worth what we will accept for him. We've got to go out and find a replacement, which - as we're not in the CL - is going to be difficult (a decent replacement, anyway). We've already got a miniscule squad, so losing one of our best players is the last thing we need. That doesn't mean Barry is worth 20m or better than Player A or Player B, but there is the value of the player and the fact we're selling him to a team we're trying to catch up (and one which seemingly has a lot of problems so may become catchable at some point). I'm glad MON is playing hardball, he's saying "this is how much we need him, this is how much you're going to have to give us for him if you want him, don't want to pay it? Fuck off elsewhere". In the past we'd have bent over at the first offer and let them have him.

I've been saying this for ages - someone will back me up - so it isnt just sour grapes, but Barry went missing for a very large chunk of this season. I also know for a fact that at the start of this year, his agents were putting feelers out to Chelsea. He's wanted to go for a long while.

England regular. Don't English players cost a lot of money? We've no need to sell and Liverpool have behaved disgracefully throughout this sage, so I suspect MON is determined to make it as difficult and expensive as he possibly can. I don't blame MON at all but I cannot see Pool bettering that offer, then its back down and sell him or put up with an unhappy player. Let him sit on the bench and sulk, then. Apparently O'Neill was "incandescent" with anger at the way Benitez acted, and Lerner will back him up whatever he decides on. FWIW, though, I reckon it'll end up being 15 plus a player, which will probably be Finnan as the others would be value too highly (although Benitez valued Crouch at 15 and Barry at 10, so Finnan is probably worth 25m). Just so long as the deal doesn't involve Carson or Riise.

England regular. Don't English players cost a lot of money? We've no need to sell and Liverpool have behaved disgracefully throughout this sage, so I suspect MON is determined to make it as difficult and expensive as he possibly can.

I doubt it. With seven subs next season, we currently can't fill 11 starting places and a full bench (assuming that fat arsed traitor fucks off to Liverpool) Bit harsh on Barry isn't it? No. People assume he's been here ages because he's turned down loads of chances to leave. Two years ago he was about to join Portsmouth, the only real bid we've ever had for him. He was on the verge of going. Then MON arrived, told him he'd make him an England regular (lest we forget, he was nowhere near the England side for five years), and lo and behold, he does just that. Last time I saw Barry playing, he was wearing an England shirt and a captain's armband. Then he gets the chance to leave and go and play with his bumfriend Gerrard, so we get the pathetic initial bid released to the press by Benitez, followed by Gerrard's disgraceful "please buy him, oh and by the way, no disrespect to Villa" bullshit, and then - worst of all - when we don't bend over and accept their first offer, Barry gets his agent to do the "please let him go, he needs CL football" routine in the media. He's treated us with no respect whatsoever, and at the first chance has decided to jump ship to the team we're allegedly trying to beat into the CL places. I don't often agree with the "player owes club" thing, but there is no doubt whatsoever that Barry at least allows us the dignity of not getting his agent to say those things in the media, at the very least.

I doubt it. With seven subs next season, we currently can't fill 11 starting places and a full bench (assuming that fat arsed traitor fucks off to Liverpool)

I still hate Slaven Bilic for that awful piece of cheating/play acting which got Laurent Blanc booked and therefore out of the World Cup final. Absolute fucking cunt Croats should've ended up in the final that year, tbh. Class team, that was. Agree I'd also say that French footballers rank just above German WW2 veterans in my "buckets of sympathy" league.

I like Bilic. Someone should tell him that that ear ring looks really fucking 1980s, though. I love it when continental Europeans try to look cool, they all end up looking like an audience member from an episode of The Tube. See also: cricketers with diamond ear studs. Twats.

Modric = this year's Elano tbh.

For the whole of the second half of the season, every single time someone took a shot at Carson, i was convinced it was going in, and most of the time it did.

Honestly, can't the fucking news wait till full time? When did the BBC sink to near-ITV levels in their football coverage?

Here we go. Come on, Martin!

Reporting for duty. They've got no fucking money at all, hence their valuation of Barry at 10m then Crouch at 15, and previous offer of "a ragbag assortment of players" (MON). I hate the way they do business in the media. "Stevie G"'s bit about Barry last week makes me want to punch his pea sized head of his stupid fucking shoulders. I hate them.

Wish some of our lot would take notice too. He says that every summer though and then buys a Zat Knight on the last day! I'll be taking no advice from that strange little man. We want players NOW!!! Who then goes on to play a pretty important role for us in an excellent season where we progress five places and finish sixth. Although to be honest, that's not what I was forecasting at the time. I do think, though, that if you've got the manager you think you should have, then you've got to trust him to do his job. It is the first week in June and all over the internet, people are going mental because their club hasn't bought anybody (except for Spurs, and well, they've always been a bit peculiar). People of the internet - chill the fuck out.

First they came for the lager louts, and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a lager lout. Ha ha, very good.

I don't see the relevance of what order clubs were taken over in. Villa only got taken over because Ellis decided he wanted to sell. We campaigned against him for years and years, and he always said he'd be taken out of Villa Park in a box. In the end, he left sooner, but only when he decided he wanted to, and he only decided that because he'd had five operations to fight cancer in just over 12 months. He won. Clubs only get sold if the people owning the major chunks of shares want to sell, no matter how attractive they are.