Village Idiot

Imagine how we feel, our city touches it! (pretty much) This Geordie guy I met maaaaaaaany years ago used to tell a joke... So God set up to create Earth, with archangel Gabriel at his side assisting him. "- We have to be careful when creating this world, Gabriel, the key is BALANCE. For example, look at that place over there, I called it 'Russia', and while it's cold, there will be lots of animals with furs people can hunt, and the liquor will be great and will warm you. And look at that other place, I called it 'North America' and it will be a land of opportunities and riches, but the food will be bad and will easily make you fat. This sea will be called 'Mediterranean' and while the weather will be great and the people beautiful, tey will also be a bit lazy and disorganized" And so God pointed the different parts of the world to Gabriel, and explained how everything was balanced, until the archangel pointed at a single city... "- Oh, that is Newcastle! The most beautiful city on Earth, the people in it are smart, beautiful, hard-working and gentle. They will have the greatest football team in the world, and everywhere they will be hailed as gentlemen and bearers of greatness and friendship. It will be a place of culture and arts, with the best night life and the best bands. Every other city in the world will look up to Newcastle." "- But God! What about the balance?" "-Just wait until you see what I'm putting next to them in Sunderland..." (it's probably as old as the dog one to you)

Okay, it really looks like a shit place to live. Had to see it with my own eyes.

don't....you honestly don't want to. Finally found some... the area around the river looks depressing. Small city centre for the looks of it too.

Out of curiosity I typed "Sunderland" in google images to check out city sights and while I get hundreds of photos of the football team and their stadium, I can barely find one of the actual town.

Nope, he was pretty quiet and soft-spoken apart from the "I asked for a chair and they bought me a lamp" spat with his president (which was pretty clever to be frank). He was also half the man he is now (meaning he wasn't so fat).

I like the scoreboard. It's Osasuna's training pitch, they were playing Osasuna B.

Valencia are down to 9, harsh red.

Palencia's goalkeeper (Spanish Segunda B, our third flight), scored a goal hitting it from his own box today. There's even video of it! (Go to www.marca.com and scroll down until you see an embedded video)

He does that a lot, missing 1 on 1s, needs to improve his composure in these situations. You need to get yourself in them in order to miss them, mind.

Which trophy is that? http://www.expressandstar.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/05/pa-7233958-336x449.jpg Isn't it still the same one that was awarded to the old First Division champions (the top tier Football League championship)? You just need to change the date on the plate to 20 years ago.

Nah, they don't. We'll be fine.

If he keeps that form, it's going to be Cronaldo. Just look at how he hoards Real's attacking play, he leads the league in shots taken by a country mile and he spent a month in the sidelines! Messi's still probably going to have his highest scoring season though. Villa will fall a bit short of last season's tally, Valencia has grown as a team this season and they have more goals coming from other players. Higuaín will be up there, but I don't think he'll outscore Cronaldo at the end.

Aye, looks like the ref shat in his shorts and gave the pen after all that mess It was a stonewall one anyway.

Valencia go one up via Silva, although it looked there was a pelanty on the other box just before the counterattack.

I love the orange shorts, not a typical color. (Valencia is known for their oranges, and it's a nod to that)

I'm going to go on a limb and say that if you win this game and don't lose against Forest, 3 more wins get you promoted.

Atlético and Valencia both lining up with their top guns for today's match. I expect a class game.

Aye, been watching Barça's second goal today over and over thanks to that

Meh, here at Barça we indulge a fair bit in the same "protect skillful players" bullshit and truth be said Márquez and Piqué are pretty cynical tacklers. Deco was a bit of a bastard when he played for us too.

Awesome goal

Ah ffs, I knew it. You can't waste all those chances always comes back to bite you in the ass.

Touré isn't injuried, he is on the bench today. Abidal and Keita are our only injuried players currently. Both are 1-2 weeks away.

Zlatan hasn't really been himself since January dunno... he was magnificient the first part of the season so I guess it's just a blip. And I just saw Ryan Shawcross has been called up to England, great timing that.

I don't know... Guardiola doesn't seem to rate him and was signed at his back (a bit of a shady business). He's at Fiore for this season and the next, and there's even a buy clause attached to it. Doesn't seem he'll ever put the Barça shirt (well, he did for a photo-op when he signed). On another matter, we are creating a billion chances against Málaga and not converting one

Best news for you lot is that Forest really seem to be on a fall an can't see them getting the strength back to mount a challenge to send you to third. I'm not a NUFC fan so the Murphy Laws of Football don't apply to me in this case and I won't jinx it, so I'll say it: you're as good as promoted.