David Icke - Son of God

He wasn't very nice to Derek after the sacking of Hughton apparently.

We've been told £10 million apparently.

I can guarantee it will be the same people who are arguing that Elliott is a senior. Are you on the wind up or do you genuinely think Pardew was talking about age? I think he was deflecting questions about Rob Green at the time if that's any clue. What age is he? Fark me

I can guarantee it will be the same people who are arguing that Elliott is a senior. Are you on the wind up or do you genuinely think Pardew was talking about age?

I don't think we have brought in a senior goalkeeper so that isn't really a contradiction. So what is he then? Depends how you define senior I suppose. Rob Green would be a senior for me. A 25 year old playing for Charlton not so much. Senior means in the senior squad, Pardew never said we wouldn't be getting a GILPIG (Grandad I'd Like To Play In Goal). It tends to be flexible according to your slant IMO. When we sold Given as a 31 year old everyone was up in arms because as a GK he still had "years ahead of him". That makes Elliott a veritable babe in arms in comparison at 25. Shay Given wasn't struggling in the third tier of English football at the age of 25.

True, it's not as if we've had six months to source and secure a new striker and left back.

I'm not happy because we seem incapable of signing players we genuinely need and quickly, but manage to rush through deals for utterly pointless acquisitions. Where was this planning ahead when Enrique decided he wanted out?

I don't think we have brought in a senior goalkeeper so that isn't really a contradiction. We've brought in a goalkeeper deemed good enough to sit on the bench during a Tyne-Wear Derby.

We need a new version of that Pardew meme.

is this really happening O-N? i mean are you trying to suggest that pardew, let alone any other manager in the world, wouldn't have at least one more area strengthen given 20m to do it with? I think it's clear we'll have signed two new strikers by the end of the window, we'll have signed a creative midfielder, two new wide-men, and a new left-back. It's far from clear tbh.

"But regardless of the result, we will always have the last laugh because we can always watch our club with genuine pride at knowing that the ideals we share with our club, and the ideals with which our club represent us, are decent and honourable whilst endorsing and supporting violent criminality will seemingly always be intrinsic to loving Newcastle United." Christ on a fucking Vespa

I want a scrappy 1-0. Picture the scene - A stoppage time corner, Cabaye floats the ball into the box which eludes everyone and heads towards the back post. There, greeted with an open goal, stands Joey Barton. He drops to nod the ball in but misjudges the bounce. To salvage the situation he raises his hand and prods the ball into the net. Barton wheels away, the Sunderland players stand in disbelief wating for the whistle to go to signal handball but unfortunately for them both Webb and his assistant's vision were obscured by Titus Bramble's fat arse. The goal stands. Seconds later the full time whistle is blown. Enraged Sunderland fans spill onto the pitch as stewards usher our boys down the tunnel to avoid the throngs of inbred, coin throwing spastics looking for a pagger. Fights break out amongst the home fans who are now covering the playing surface. Chairs are ripped out and thrown at the away end. After a few minutes rozzers in riot gear descend onto the playing surface and dish out a few well deserved beatings while police outside do their best to stop the celebrating away fans from meeting their less educated counterparts. Fast forward to Match of the Day and the moralising begins. "That boy Barton is at it again", Linekar will say with that oh so unsettling smirk. Hansen and Shearer will nod sagely. The newspapers will be no better - "The Hand of Sod!" the Sunday Mirror will shriek, while some bloated columnist will muse upon the impact Barton's latest indiscretion will have on the youth of this fine nation. Joey will go on national radio to justify his actions, claiming that the team would've suffered if he hadn't punched the ball into the net. Robbie Savage will agree and Alan Green won't hear him but will instead whinge about his viewing position at the Reebok for that days game, muttering that "it's a completely unacceptable way for a club like Bolton to treat a man like me", before cutting into his rant to bring us the breaking news that Sunderland will be forced to play their next 4 home games behind closed doors due to crowd trouble. "I thought they already were" Savage will say, "judging by the number of pink seats on display every other week!" And they'll all laugh. Now that's a derby, boys and girls.

I'm going to dispense with the bravado and just admit I'm fucking cacking myself I fucking hate the build up to the derby.

We played Enrique in a pointless preseason friendly when his move to Liverpool was a matter of days away. His inclusion proves nowt.

There's a £25 admin charge if you do it during the season.

To be expected. It was hardly a bloody battle royale but given the hysterical reaction to the entire situation I imagine they lost sight of the fact that it was one player hitting another with the rest trying to break it up, not a mass brawl.

I don't remember that. However, I do remember the Mackem pitch invader shaking Roeder's hand when being led off by the bizzies. Glenn was in full blown mode, extended his hand and the stupid fucker shook it

Wouldn't start with Marveaux until I see more of him, personally. Is he even match fit? (Pardew very well have seem more of him and know he is match fit, mind you). Their midfield still looks a little watery and hope we can dominate it, so five in midfield would do me. Cabaye in a more advanced role (some might say Nolan-esque ) with Shola up top. And Vuckic available on the bench please. I assume he must be close. He was fit enough to play what would've been a full half against Fiorentina until it pissed down. From what I've seen he seems to have more of an end product than Obertan and for that reason if he was fit I'd start him.

I'd like to see us go: ------------------Krul Simpson - Colo - Saylor - New LB/Raylor ------Barton - Tiote - Cabaye Marveaux----------------------Jonas ------------------Ba/Shola/New ST

I know, that's where I was sat

Arsenal were at it all game. Sanga went down on the other side of the box about three paces after he'd got past Jonas and Walton still gave it.

I noticed this when I tried to sit down at half time. I'm only 6ft and it was very, very uncomfortable.

Dortmund's Die Südtribüne is very steep and the largest safe standing area in European football. http://a3.l3-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/20/6dcc3638e37f0076ad650e1d1118312b/l.jpg

You're wrong on several levels. Firstly people aren't arguing for terracing, they want safe standing (which is what they have in Germany, not terraces). The argument is overwhelmingly in favour of safe standing, it is safe, cheaper and is what people want. If you don't agree I suggest you pay attention next time you watch MOTD and see how many people stand in the premier league. We're talking about full stands as well, not just a few blocks. Not to mention most away crowds will stand all game. Search on Youtube for safe standing if you want to learn more. So I'm supposed to look at a video on youtube thats biased in the fact that it wants to bring back safe standing made by supporters of safe standing and not actually take into account the other facts around safe standing that is ignored by these youtube videos and has not been carried out by an independent survey? Or you could just use common sense and realise that standing is a pretty natural thing for a human being to do, ergo we're quite good at it and the risk is minimal?

http://steventaylorserialkiller.tumblr.com/