Wullie

Have Amazon been informed? Move over Clarkson, definite ratings winner on the cards.

I mean, I can't speak for the super rich elite like Steve Bruce but regardless of how much money I had, unless I've got my own jet I'd fly from my local airport for a 3 hour flight like everyone else does. You can't get to Portugal from Newcastle via business class airline, am I fuck schlepping to Heathrow or somewhere for a bit of extra legroom. He lives in Ponteland I think, the airport's basically in his back garden.

Forest

"Their longest thread is about Everton! They're so obsessed and weird!" This thread has been running since 2017 when he was NUFC manager. Yeah it's definitely us who look a bit stupid in this scenario.

You can do it using the player's page on whoscored.com. Choose the Detailed tab, then Shots and Body Parts: You can also search across the whole PL in the same way, and put them in order:

Cheers triggs

FFS Ronaldo

They mentioned that he'd been on bail on the Guardian football podcast so it was in an official police statement somewhere.

Celtic have just signed a Croat and he's taken 88 as well.

What's the significance?

The amount of people who still pay Ashley money to go to matches that are on Twitter saying "if he had any self respect Bruce would walk!" is laugh out loud funny.

Christ Barcelona look in a right state now.

First ever finally @Village Idiot

Drinkwater fascinates me tbh, he's had such a weird career.

Bit of Mike Dean bingo: Fred/Pogba/Traore 110/1 Shaw/Semedo/Neves 55/1 Moutinho/AWB/Maguire 75/1

7/1 with 365 was absolutely insane. Got a small double up with Etobo, annoyed Kane hasn't scored, would have been another.

Skipp/Westwood 43/1

Had no idea Cutrone was at Empoli, his career's fallen off a bit of a cliff.

Martin Jol was sacked at half time for Spurs, during a UEFA Cup match iirc.

Aye, red is always 2, a player getting 2 yellows counts as 3.

I took Arsenal under 5 cards on my bloody bet builder for a tiny odds boost as Atkinson is reffing.

It's as clear a red card as you'll see.

I've got Walker/Cedric/Kolasinac at 95/1. Can't see Walker getting one sadly given how shit Arsenal look. Thought Saka was going to be down his side.

Splitting the minnows like Spurs into the Conference thing has instantly made that competition look absolutely class.

Liverpool sell their youth players all the time, the difference is that they get £20m for them after they've made 3 sub appearances. We have a remarkable knack of selling promise for peanuts.