Keefaz

Nice one.

No surprise we're the worst pen takers. Useless cunts.

See those pen stats make no sense. 81% of pens in matches scored, but only 66% in pen shootouts. Aye, but almost all pens during matches are taken by experienced penalty-takers. Mongs.

The fake commentary's hilarious.

Big Sam'd love this. Basically supports his entire philosophy.

Italy haven't scored direct from a free-kick in their last 52 attempts. Sounds unbelievable.

They say they've taken a big sample, but it's really no where near big enough to come to many concrete conclusions.

They've contrived to make a load of shite out of an interesting study.

Some amazing stats so far, tbh.

WHEN FOOTBALL ATTACKS!

Honestly would've been a superior programme without the talking heads.

Eh? I'm sure they've got these goals in the wrong order.

Exactly. Bullshit. Shouldn't even be top 20.

ITV, innit. Utterly fucking shit. Goals have been good. Some I don't remember seeing before.

Also, anyone complaining about the new ball, look at the bend on some of these shots.

Anyone watching this? Some of the commentary's a bit shite, but the goals are niiiiice.

He's a traitor, TT. Go for the eyes!

18.55 - 19.55, ITV4: FIFA World Cup: Greatest Goals Matt Smith counts down the 50 greatest World Cup goals ever scored. Will Diego Maradona's brilliant solo goal against England in 1986 get the vote as the best ever goal? Journalists and pundits such as Clive Tyldesley, Robbie Earle and David Pleat give their views on the best goals scored over the years in the worlds biggest football tournament. 19.00 - 19.30, BBC3: World Cup's Most Shocking Moments (again) 19.55 - 21.00, ITV4: How To Win The World Cup A documentary which reveals the scientific key to answering sport's biggest question this summer - how to win soccer's biggest prize. A team of leading experts and footballing legends look at every minute of World Cup action from the past 20 years to provide exclusive scientific data and analysis. The results are a fascinating and surprising insight into the strengths and weaknesses of the teams most likely to succeed in South Africa. One team in particular fullfills all the criteria and looks set to triumph again.

12.30, FiveUSA: Soccer Dog - European Cup "This movie is a total disgrace the research must have been zero as it is full of terrible mistakes and is clearly filmed in the USA by someone who does not even know what Scotland looks like As a scot it made me extremely angry as to how we were portrayed in this bargain bin rubbish The accents are terrible, They didn't even bother to put UK number plates on the cars in the film whilst I accept the film is a light hearted kids movie, they should realise we are not all kilt wearing long haired Mel Gibson look a likes Time for the director and producers of this junk to spend a little time on research."

Don't deny it. You'd love a little celebratory ban, man.

Dave's itching for a ban since returning.

Is the new ball 'the roundest ball ever manufactured' as is always the case? Eventually, they'll make the ball so perfectly spherical it just won't stop once you get it in motion.

Saylor full England call-up.

Rio's looked really poor of late, tbh. He was actually hitting the opposite of form.

Just pop it back in and load him with drugs Okay so I spoke too soon and apparently they put it back in so he's "okay." Still nerve-racking though. Guaranteed to pop out now during a game.