Ashley17

Macheda, this little cunt. On for Evra

Simpson for pope

I'm fancying a Rob Lee/Solskjaer scenario here

It's admirable that Pardew likes to wack the difficulty level up, must be on legendary by this point

Lovenkrands on for HBA. FFS!

Got to get Santon on or something to protect Raylor.

Jonas two yellows, red card

The fuck happened there

Fancy another slinky Perch through ball

Guthrie subbed, Perch on. Urgh.

Radio commentary is killing me. They this, they that. WHO MAN!?

Guthrie booked. Pardew said he probably wouldn't play 90 minutes so I doubt he'll be on the pitch in 10 minutes.

Finally makes up for Shearer getting decked by Howard at the Stretford end a few years ago

Shit the bed, cupboards and wardrobes

Ba vs De Gea

SHIT THE BED

PENALTY TO US AT OLD FUCKING TRAFFORD

Colo close

Sammy time

I wrote a match report for the school paper when I was 8 that contained the phrase "the referee was crap and pap" Allow me to dust off an old classic.

Oh fuck off

Urgh. This better not go in

Ryan Taylor man, focus you fuck

Right, lads. It's entering the "Ryan Taylor" 5 minutes that cost us last week. Keep your heads, and if necessary all play left back.

Good day to be playing at home so far in the Premiership