S.S.R.

Physioroom.com has listed right-backs Gretar Steinsson (Bolton) and Samuel Ricketts (Hull) as out for the next four weeks with explosive diarrhoea.

On the BBC website. Keegan says in the interview that Wise and Jimenez told him that they'd signed him up before he knew who he was, and he had to look him up. Who gives a toss who signs the players, let KK do what he's good at.

Hmm... if only they had a watermark to give away their source...

Or how many times Oba has somersaulted in the air?

Fuck off. No, on second thoughts, you're right.

mackems.gif Keegan out as Ashley brings in shearer.

Newcastle in bottom half after failure to win first game. Keegan in crisis talks with Ashley.

Mrs Butt of Salford.

Keys said "He's off to get a drugs test." Who, the guy who picked the MOTM?

Brilliant. It gets easier from now on.

Butt - Fuck off.

Are Man Utd sponsored by Soul Glow or something?

Get Vidic off the pitch and let us take advantage, then.

He's playing left-back and left-wing.

It's the same the other way round, tbf.

"No, we are not related."

Jonas takes this piss out of Rooney.

Taylor should have took a year to walk off, like everyone does to us.

Spawny cunts. Only cause we had a man down.

Shite defending. We'd have been crucified for that.

Fuck me!

"Rooney's first game as a married man!" "Wedding rings... regulations... blah, blah..." Fuck off, I didn't pay for Heat magazine.

Shay? Andy Gray launching into his epic love poems about Rooney, five minutes into the game.

http://img84.imageshack.us/img84/1708/keganjf5.jpg By the power of Grey's Monument - WE HAVE THE POWER!!!

Plessis looks shite. Hyypia looks past it.