Raconteur

There I was all fired up, full of vitriol - and then saw it was you sir In all honesty we won't even have the first idea until the (northern) summer when the Asian Cup kicks off - but current coach Graham Arnold makes Glenn Roeder look like a decisive tactical genius. Would love Louis van Gaal but we (Australia) may as well wish for Sir Alex Ferguson or Fabio Capello... The same might apply to NUFC too...

It's not just NUFC he's blathering on about either - is he going for "Rent-a-quote of the week?" http://soccernet.espn.go.com/news/story?id=414441&cc=3436 It's not possible for Australia to win the World Cup, eh Louis? Well shit, thanks for telling us that, because we were all pumped up thinking the Socceroos winning in 2010 was a certainty...

That's fucking gold

First thing I thought of too - if memory serves he once said something like 'only marginally better than Hughes', and we all know how terrible he thinks our former 'star' is

Aren't they the same quotes, just rehashed ahead of the second leg?

I've been reading the comments of those who prioritise signing a striker and (in the main) shaking my head, but Robbie Keane is exactly the kind of player that makes me see their logic. As HTL said about the Duff signing - transfers are about availability, and if Keane is available we should snap him up, because he is quality. We all know our number one priority is a left back, but after this... what? If Keane was available for a reasonable price (I'll say 7-9m) should we sign him ahead of a left back? No, but ahead of a centre half, centre midfielder or right back, I would say yes. Of course, it also depends on how big the transfer pot is too...

Its; Melbourne Victory Sydney FC Queensland Roar It's part of living in a heathen country - the whole nickname thing being part of the official club name. And we have other silly names too, like Glory, Jets, Mariners and the now-defunct Knights. Apparently all the cool names were taken by league, union and AFL Oh, and we're not Oceania anymore

QFT, word for word... And along the lines of billytray's response - until last season my answer would be Denis Bergkamp. I know he's not the most popular of figures but an utterly sublime player and I'm convinced Arsenal miss him more than is acknowledged.

Aye, it's as ridiculous as the (sarcastic) comparisons between Bramble and Baresi. Maldini = the greatest left back in (at least) the past 20 years Roberto Carlos = the man who built a career on the back of one free kick

Well, like we sing at the cricket "I'd rather be a convict than a Pom" As much as I would love to have had Big Dukes at St James', merlin had it right when he said NOT at the expense of Milner...

If Sepp Blatter is saying we should take up the matter with the FA does that mean he will support our case if we sued the FA? Or relax their own regulations regarding taking football matters through the civil courts? Not fucking likely!

I think you can go to the bookies now - Melbourne are 3-0 up at the half and Adelaide are down to 10 men. Giddy up sir!

I can only relate to my experience with Australia (or Australian league) matches - and will admit I do feel a bit like a soopafan, but only because football fans in Australia are so schizophrenic. There are tens of thousands of newer, ignorant and casual fans who have no understanding or appreciation of the game - as well as those long standing fans who know they are being served up dross. For Stevie's comment "most these cunts wouldn't even like football if it wasn't for SKY and football" here it would read "if it wasn't for the World Cup" and "half these cunts haven't got a clue" - more like three-quarters! Listening to a rugby fan try to explain what's happening on the pitch to his equally ignorant girlfriend is both embarrassing and amusing at the same time...

So let me get this right - Bellamy attacks Riise with a golf club because he refused to sing a karaoke song? And he threw a chair at John Carver over a parking space? And allegedly punched a woman for looking at him? Nice to see he has a good perspective on the important things in life...

Not just that - who the fuck actually voted for him?!? A Secret Chelsea mole on the board, or a sad WUM? Gotta say I'm stoked Gerrard hasn't received a single vote - that said neither has Henry or Rooney at this point, but then Henry has had a poor season by his standards while Rooney is having all his votes taken by Ronaldo. I guess it's only a matter of thime before the "OMG Stevie G iz God!!!1!1!" crowd arrives though

Not true. Vds was rated throughout hes career and experienced he's best form at Fulham. Agree with Lemon though. I can't believe I'm agreeing with a Spud, but truly VDS is and was quality - before, during and after his Fulham spell...

Are you kidding me?!? After Cristiano Ronaldo who is the next worse diver in the league? Robben tbh. Touche

Are you sure you're allowed to post all of those fixtures?

I said something similar in the Duff thread, but the fact is its unrealistic. Just imagine it's the World Cup Final (or Champions League, whatever) and Henry is charging into the box and has a swan dive. The ref has to be absolutely certain, zero question at all, in order to send him off. Then you have to factor reputations into it too - are players known as divers like Cristiano Ronaldo and Henry are going to be "gone after"? What happens when a player cleans up his act like Drogba? I appreciate your basic sentiment, agree wholeheartedly, but applying it would be a nightmare! Henry isn't really known as a diver. Are you kidding me?!? After Cristiano Ronaldo who is the next worse diver in the league? Not just a diver but a fucking hypocrite - all that shite after the Champions League about "not a woman" and then weeks later diving his way through to the World Cup final. Great player, repeat simulation offender...

I said something similar in the Duff thread, but the fact is its unrealistic. Just imagine it's the World Cup Final (or Champions League, whatever) and Henry is charging into the box and has a swan dive. The ref has to be absolutely certain, zero question at all, in order to send him off. Then you have to factor reputations into it too - are players known as divers like Cristiano Ronaldo and Henry are going to be "gone after"? What happens when a player cleans up his act like Drogba? I appreciate your basic sentiment, agree wholeheartedly, but applying it would be a nightmare! What about retrospective punishment. Okay it doesn't help the team it just happened to but it does punish the player. An example SWP with Elliott last season. I would like to see a ruling where a panel would say that SWP dived so he gets a match or two match ban and Elliott's red card recinded! To make it a red card offence would be very difficult but I feel afterwards its easier to punish! It's a solution - not entirely satisfactory because as you say it doesn't help the team it happened to. If it's a crunch match a player is more likely to take the risk of being retrospectively banned if he can win a penalty/the match right now. But yeah, something has to be done, and a solution, however imperfect, is better than not even trying to solve the problem. EDIT: For example Fabio Grosso's swan dive in the World Cup second round against Australia - even if he ran the risk of a one, three, five match ban, he would always have dived just on the odd chance he won that penalty, given it was so late in the match...

That's fair I suppose - I'm reminded of the 1994 World Cup when FIFA brought in the edict banning the tackle from behind. Initially the refs went stupid - red cards to Zola and Etcheverry come to mind - but in short order rationality came in, the tackle from behind was largely driven out of the game...

I said something similar in the Duff thread, but the fact is its unrealistic. Just imagine it's the World Cup Final (or Champions League, whatever) and Henry is charging into the box and has a swan dive. The ref has to be absolutely certain, zero question at all, in order to send him off. Then you have to factor reputations into it too - are players known as divers like Cristiano Ronaldo and Henry are going to be "gone after"? What happens when a player cleans up his act like Drogba? I appreciate your basic sentiment, agree wholeheartedly, but applying it would be a nightmare! Then he wouldn't get sent off for divind, as he wouldn't dive. Yeah, fair enough, but I guess I meant more from the ref's mindset point of view - Drogba had a bad reputation for diving, and while he has been cleaning up his act it's another element in that split-second decision the referee has to make. Player X always dives, Player Y dives sometimes, Player Z used to dive but not anymore... Preceonceptions are, unfortunately, part of a refs make-up. Would be interesting to get Paul Mosely's views (or any other refs out there)

Don't believe it for a second - for many reasons. Firstly, Rafa is apparently less than keen on him, secondly they're newly rich and can afford the very best (Villa is the hot tip) and finally I can't see NUFC and the Scousers agreeing a price (they'd be loathe to pay top dollar for a player they let go for 8m while we wouldn't take less than the 16-17m we paid for him)

I said something similar in the Duff thread, but the fact is its unrealistic. Just imagine it's the World Cup Final (or Champions League, whatever) and Henry is charging into the box and has a swan dive. The ref has to be absolutely certain, zero question at all, in order to send him off. Then you have to factor reputations into it too - are players known as divers like Cristiano Ronaldo and Henry are going to be "gone after"? What happens when a player cleans up his act like Drogba? I appreciate your basic sentiment, agree wholeheartedly, but applying it would be a nightmare!

What can we do to eradicate it from the game? Personally I would love to see diving become a straight red offence, but that's unrealistic because the ref would have to be 110% certain in order to pull out the red. Video reviews and bans opens a Pandora's Box - because you're opening the door for all sort of retrospective penalties not to mention the fact that that the likes of FIFA, UEFA and the FA would be administering it, and they couldn't be trusted with anything! Would be nice if once, just once, a manager said in his post-match press conference "Player X clearly dived, and we will be suspending him internally." Would gain lots of favourable publicity and might hopefully put public pressure on the likes of Mourinho and Wenger to conform closer to the spirit of the game... Well, it's a nice fantasy!