Keefaz

Right. Well. Let's just start again.

Nice.

HOLY FUCKING SHIT!

Colo furious.

Playing quite well in this spell. Absolutely shit the bed when they counter.

Nicely defended, ffs.

Hot fuck.

He's played a hundred matches for us and he's still making the same mistakes. Sod off, man.

What are the laws about wearing headgear on the pitch? Pretty sure you can't turn up in a fucking bowler hat.

Jesus Christ, man. He's fucking rubbish. Can we get some perspective?

The media bias is clearly swinging the MO'N way. To be expected: they rim that fucking guy.

Holy fucking shit, what was that?

Still doesn't trust him on the right, can't drop Cisse or Ba. Yeah, sounds about right.

Aye. Quite disturbing.

"We need to find a way to get him on the pitch" Don't even know what that means.

I must admit, I actually pointed at the screen during that bit and laughed.

I think at one point he tried to correct himself and ended up saying "pelenalty".

FWIW, I want to see him have a run. I know he's going to piss me off at times, but if it's the choice between him and Raylor/Obertan... it's not even a choice, tbh.

He clearly sees things other players don't. That one ball he put in to Ba is a ball no one else in the team would have the imagination to do or try.

Takes a corner as comfortably as his face takes a smile.

Smashing player doing his best in a team that hardly plays to his strengths.

Oh, fuck off.

He doesn't lose it any more often than the other fuckers, it just gets noticed more because of the expectancy when he has the ball, and because Pardew's drawn attention to it. He lost it countless times today, but like said totally outweighed by what he does when he doesn't miss control it, pass it to an opposing player, fall over or run into a cul-de-sac. It's a myth created by Pardew that he loses it so often. Seriously everybody loses the ball but people only pay attention when it's HBA thinking 'Hmm, Pardew has a point I guess'. It's not a myth, man. There's loads of times when, rather than play a simple ball to keep possession, he'll try something daft to keep the ball himself. I know a lot of times it would mean passing to Danny Simpson, but that's life...

Balls into the box were rubbish all day: from corners, FKs, and open play. Half of that is due to Jonas being the one putting the ball in 50% of the time, like.