Keefaz

Get in!

Of course he'd be a good signing, man. Massive facial palms to anyone who says otherwise, tbh.

Cos' we've always been shit in it.

How can there be another Nobby, ffs? Typical of Shola to give two people the same fucking nickname.

A lot of these player who get injured a lot simply don't know how to roll with a challenge or keep their bodies safe.

Bye, Robin!

Honestly think this is gonna happen. Got a feeeeelin.

Just got in. Done deal? Good news! Gonna bump the missus to celebrate.

Cheick Tiote, Cheick Cheick Tiote Watch out, man, you're gonna hurt somebody

Drones are the special electric vehicles than Lerner puts on for Villa fans.

Something about his moby dick.

I'd be impressed if we could manage a chant with the Hebrew 'hch' sound in his name. Cover half in the pitch in phlegm.

I'm gonna call him Check It Out.

'Your... "business plan"--if I can call it that--is nothing short of moronic. My five year-old has done better with crayons. You're a retard and, in my opinion, a borderline fucking lunatic. The only way this product would sell is if you went to live in the land of fucking cunts. I'm out. Get to fuck.'

Seem incapable of releasing the ball at the right time. Works hard, though.

JE SUIS UN ARTISTE!

Would love to see him at another club. Not just because it would mean we didn't have to look after him anymore, but it would mean him leaving his comfort zone. There can't be many players in this game who've basically dossed around the same club for 15-20 years. Probably gets his mam to do his ironing for him.

Still no idea how you're supposed to pronounce his name.

Wasn't there a time Deschamps was rumoured to be coming to wa?

I think the Keane move's on. Whenever I hear wor Chris say 'speculation' now, I think it's nailed-on.

Aye, might be a translation. Howay, man, Skirge. He speaks better English in that quote than you do, ffs.

Never seen that forum before. It's like an alternate reality. Who's their Dave?

The Accrington match motivated me to create the thread, but it's not the prime reason, obviously, rather it's his shambling performances in a B&W for nearly a decade that did it.

Probably signed loads of players no one knows about.

Played brilliantly against Barcelona?