Sifu

Attendance: 9,731

Absolute idiots on that blog. Madtoon

It's being held at Darlington's ground.

@SkySports Sky Sports #football Sky Sports sources understand Everton are attempting to beat Aston Villa to the signing of Charles N'Zogbia. http://bit.ly/nc6rmA 8 minutes ago via twitterfeed

Good thing it's half time.

Lee Ryder: Re. Smith....he has put in his usual combative performance. Looks hairy and in need of a shave!

Ferguson has picked up a knock.

F*** my heart sank for a moment there

Positive stuff

Lee Ryder: And during the break a rousing chorus of "We beat the scum 5-1" from the Toon fans. This is like an FA Cup semi-final atmosphere.!

Lee Ryder: Ben Arfa is showing some nice early touches here while Leon Best is also looking lively. Darlo look a bit shellshocked from the second minute opener.

Goal

Text. Ta.

This Ryder commentary thing, does he actually speak or is it text commentary?

Good question.

Smith will score tonight.

Sky Sports' very own tosser who posts s*** on Twitter then.

Oh dear indeed

it's a bizzare place. most of the mackems i know are fairly grounded about their club but then you look on there and if you didn't know better you'd think they were footballing purists brought up on years of intricate carpet football with fans as refined and polite as a 19th century home counties church fete. My feelings exactly. My mackem mates are really sound and very modest, then I look at RTG and think wtf!

Hmmm, I wonder if he's going to go on the US tour.

Aye!

Decent fee indeed.