brummie

Someone on RTG has spotted an italian web site article saying Sunderland want to sign John Guidetti on loan. Cue loads of them telling that Villa poster on there (who, FWIW, has precisely the same opinions as me on MON) that this "signing" is evidence he knows "fuck all" about MON, and "just because he was your manager for 3 years (sic) doesn't mean you know him". One of them has posted, as evidence he doesn't just sign UK based players, the names of Stan Varga (bought from Sunderland), Carlos Cuellar (Rangers), Johan Mjallby (MON didn't sign him), and Didier Agathe (bought from Hibs). On top of all that, also forgetting that, technically, Guidetti is a UK based player as he's owned by Man City. Honestly, I have nothing against Sunderland, genuinely, but that forum is the biggest mongfest on the internet. It attracts some genuinely stupid people, I'd be thoroughly embarassed of it if I were a Sunderland fan.

Milner won't go to Sunderland, he was royally fucked off with MON when he was with us, as it was MON who started making it sound like Milner had been begging to leave, when actually, it was nothing of the sort.

Interesting. Hopefully he's going to spend a bit more now we've started to rein in the wage bill.

Not bad. Though.. what took Vlaar so long? If Villa were waiting for Collins to go before signing Vlaar, that seems a little Very Brownsesque. edit: not really all that Brownsian, they would've got rid of Collins and signed Gavin Hoyte on a free. Dunno, his medical was scheduled for Monday and Tuesday, and we agreed fee and terms ages ago. Ultimately, this is precisely the wheeling and dealing MON refused to engage in. Also, disturbing utterings we were paying Collins 48k a week. That just says it all, really.

Sell Collins to West Ham for £2.5m, bring in Ron Vlaar (just signed) for £3.2m

Such a shit player, shame he didn't go to the mackems. Great in his first season, shite in the subsequent two. Also, a penchant for getting involved in rucks outside pubs in the early hours, and - utterly unforgiveably - twatted Gordon Cowans on a club "bonding" field trip.

Damn straight.

Invest money in the Spanish Property or Stock Market.... *sharp intake of breath*

Lucky or extremely talented, worked since the age of 5 and having absolutely sweet FA life aside from fotball. Career usually done by 30 as well, so they have to figure out some way of securing the next 50 years financially. I envy them obviously but I fully understand how they would try to engineer moves that secures them a better pay. Its a job for them, they are not club fans. I understand that they want better moves, too. What I don't agree with is stamping their feet, refusing to go on tours and refusing to play matches in order to get them. Even a mediocre player on PL wages for most of his career will earn enough by 30 to never have to work again.

Its pointless, and I see no reason why Mike and Dekka even bothered to include it. I firmly believe they were taking the piss, having a bit of fun at Liverpool's expense. I honestly wouldn't be able to maintain a straight face whilst talking to them about the possible existence of a universe in which Carroll was worth *more than* £35m. Top stuff.

Footballers are incredibly privileged members of society, who earn truly vast amounts of money for doing something they love. They're extremely lucky. The absolute very least they could do is keep their side of the bargain and play games.

*slowly nods* how unpredictable.

Interesting.

I'd bet a pretty large amount of money that MON hasn't even heard of Spain, let alone Llorente.

The thing is, I knew he'd go somewhere else, get another job, but I thought I'd be limited to talking about him with other Villa fans. I feel quite lucky I'd been here for a few years and he went to Sunderland. Hey presto, a perfect audience for my rants. That's another thing. Sunderland. Really, I have nothing against them, by and large. One thing I will say, though, is I bet MON thought he'd walk into a much better job than that when he flounced out on us. By all accounts (and this is something Barry Bannan confirmed in the press), he was pissed off whilst still with us that Liverpool didn't talk to him about their job (when they overlooked him for the mighty Roy Hodgson). I can only wonder what kind of a come down Sunderland must be for him. GOOD.

Thanks, that's very kind of you.

Aye you have to get rid of Arty Ziff, so some other mug employs him, and forthwith, you then have someone daft enough to buy all of the shite he's bought for your club. That's the amazing thing. It's fucking ace. He's going to have at least one of James Collins and Stephen Warnock, and very possibly both of them. Ask any Villa fan you like, there's not one of us who wants to see that toxic fucking defence again, and those two were amongst the worst bits of it. Already rumours about the execrable Alan Hutton going to Stoke. Wasn't even taken to our US tour. Honestly, I'm so happy recently.

Incidentally, that ^^^^ really is exactly what will happen. Just watch.

There's a thread on that Mackem board with the title "all the stuff them Villa fans said" which goes on to claim it is all bollocks. You can imagine the stuff that was said by our fans aboiut MON - largely, the stuff I too say, as it's the fucking truth. Anyway. Said thread basically accuses us of being bitter / ungrateful whatever, but oh, the irony, for their own board is now filling up nicely with threads complaining about MON for doing THE EXACT SAME THINGS WE SAID HE'D DO. And to think, they're only at stage 1 or 2 of a MON pre-season at the moment. Stage 1 - for ages, nothing happens other than people leaving. Stage 2 - signs someone in the slightly uninspiring, but "he can only add to the squad" mould. Someone he's worked with before usually. This time, Cuellar. Stage 3 - preseason is well under way now, things aren't looking too good, fans getting really scared at skimpiness of squad and lack of action. People start talking about how tired the squad looked at the end of the season (season in which for 90 percent of games, he's started the same XI). Stage 4 - this is the point at which Martin stirs, and realises he'd best do some business. Not having a scouting network of any sort (and this isn't an exaggeration, at Villa, we had one single man, Ian Storey-Moore, and that was it), Martin decides to buy British / British based, as he's running out of time, and he's seen the players on MOTD before. At this point, he will make a truly baffling signing. This happens at this stage almost every season. Imagine our situation when, awash with Lerner's initial millions, Martin made some of these signings: Zat Knight (to replace Gary Cahill), Marlon Fucking Harewood (three year contract, big lad), Emile Shitting Heskey (while Sunderland are signing Darren Bent). You get the drift. At this point, loyalists will say "I'll judge him on what he does in our shirt" - basically, making excuses, acting encouraged, whilst actually, crying inside. Stage 5 - approaching the end of the window. The season has started. The majority of fans are now at the point of hysteria. The average fan is thinking DO SOMETHING, IN THE NAME OF THE LORD, FUCKING SIGN SOMETHING. Stage 6 - deadline day approaches. Martin realises he's in big fucking trouble and needs bodies in fast. Calls meetings with agents of players of unspectacular quality. Agents aware Martin's running out of trouble, ask for ludicrous terms. Habib Beye's agent, fresh from trying to negotiate his player into Hull City, for example, is aware he's onto a winner here - "well, he's 32 now, so shall we say three years at 40k a week?" Deal done. Here comes Emile Heskey's agent. Martin really wants the big man, he knows him, he's worked with him before, he loves a big lad up front. "So, Mart, how does a 3.5 year contract to take Emile through to 35 years of age, at 65k a week sound?" Of course, Martin has no choice, he can't do anything. Three or four years of this ^^^^ you end up with a load of players of unspectacular quality, on big, big money and long contracts, and your wage bill is 90 percent of your turnover. Still, you can always get Martin to move some of them on, can't you? But, of course, Martin's fucked off by that point, such transfer dealing is beneath him.

Thereby rendering the signing of the useless ginger 60 yard lumper Collins from us more possible.

Well, since MON left, it hasn't been that rare. Houllier was only here long enough to buy 3, and one of those was from abroad. Even McLeish signed Holman. Holman, El Ahmadi and Vlaar suggest we've got some kind of Dutch scouting thing happening.

I don't know what all that kerfuffle was over this last week. Anyway, please, black and white friends, join me in a moment of prayer - any god you choose will do - to hope that this will mean the man they know as "James Collins" shall now be free to move to Sunderland.

Porn Dwarf and Mr Tumnus have a long record of shit like this in the name of publicity.

*punches the air* yes, you fucking beauty! getting shot of both of them at the same time, perfect.

Is this that Peace Cup thing? We won that two years ago. Big money in that.