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That's a great pic, Paully. However it doesn't beat this one, which is just bonkers

Didn't he also spank us in his first game - or one of his first games - as West Ham manager?

Took over as caretaker saying he didn't want it permanently and I'm not entirely sure he ever did. He did a good job and it seemed like Shepherd felt he had to offer it - or saw it as the easy option. If it wasn't offered I don't think he'd have kicked up a stink and I can't blame him for accepting.

Really sad news. Wasn't born when he played for us but had a ST when he took over. The run he took us on from the muck being served up under Souness was remarkable and turned what was going to be a very mundane season into an enjoyable one - especially when we hammered the mackems on their own patch.

Warnock constantly referring to Jonathan Pearce as "JP", man. It's nearing "Fletch and Macca" levels of irritancy. Hopefully once Covid's sorted we can tackle the shite commentary epidemic that's blighting the country.

He’ll be in the bath with it as we speak Can just picture him getting in to be greeted with this. Nee eye contact: "No Steve, don't bring the offal to bed. Not tonight."

More of this tbh. Better than the last 20 or so pages of shite.

Difficult to remember what you've said previously when your brain's focussed on the vat of pork pie jelly you've got sitting in the fridge.

Just needs to invite Luke, Keysey, Simon Jordan and Chris Sutton round for some Brukake fun and I'm sure he'll be smiling again.

Matt Ritchie's fault for not getting the instructions across quickly enough

I much prefer him to Darlow and I will actually give him credit for summat that didn't work out as well. First half he took a cross and went for the quick throw. It was intercepted, but it was the right idea. Would prefer to see something like that than Darlow's predictable hold-on-for-an-age-then-just-aimlessly-boot-it-down-the-middle-onto-the-head-of-the-centre-half approach.

Beginning to annoy me how much Hayden's getting away with his involvement in their goal because Dubravka should've saved the header. Jamal Lewis has shockers like that regularly and gets called worse than shit every time.

Well that's interesting. Elidh Barbour's just asked Lascelles if there were unclear instructions from the touchline after the third substitution

Might’ve had a chance as it wasn’t at his near post, which is where he’s unrivalled at being beaten.

Obviously there’s nee context

FFS Dubravka. Rotten save.

Glad that was resolved properly.

FFS. Wipe out your own man, have play stopped and essentially relieve all pressure.

What went through Matt Ritchie’s head when he leathered that? Did he genuinely think he’d score? Test the keeper? Do something that wouldn’t be completely slice it in Matt Ritchie style?

Bet Issac Hayden had a lovely view of that. Would’ve had an even better one if he was marking him properly.

We’re gonna try and get crosses in to absolutely fucking no-one

Here we go, Murphy on and now Ritchie. We’ll also inexplicably set up 4-2-4 or summat radge and completely go to pot. He fucking loves it.

Seriously, can we fucking address the strength and conditioning issues?! The mouth-breather in the dugout will say it’s “bad luck” but it fucking isn’t.

Fraser's coming on according to Ryder. The tweet helpfully doesn't say for who. EDIT: Almiron. Presumably fucked.

There was a moment where Lewis had time and space to have a proper look up and put a cross in. But he completely bottled it and gave it to ASM who was five-feet away on the corner of the 18-yard-box and not expecting it. Proper "Here, you do it" stuff.