Neil

Oh dear.

Predictably, you caused us a bunch of problems. Defensively we were at times shambolic when "defending" the long balls from the back (Ameobi won a fair few headers, or at least prevented us from winning them clearly) but we also didn't know what to do when Obertan and Marveaux ran at us. I thought Obertan particularly early on with his sheer pace had us on the back foot, while Marveaux was the one who I thought was going to open us up most. Pleased with how we played once we got past the first 10-15 minutes but when Pienaar and Fellaini both missed chances in the 1st half I thought it was going to be another one of those days. Seen a lot of the comments about the refereeing. Now, let's not go on too much about officiating in Everton v Newcastle fixtures this season. Fwiw the free kick was clearly soft, and both sides had so-so shouts for a penalty. As for the niggly fouls, I thought most were fouls. The crowd were up in arms about every single decision - I'd speculate that was as much, if not more, frustration directed at the performance in parts, as opposed to the individual decisions. Personally I was fuming at how much we invited you onto us later in the 2nd half, it was like we were wanting you to score, and I'm surprised you didn't in the end. The younger Ameobi also caused us trouble in his brief appearance. Heitinga and Naismith were as predicted, for lack of a better word, shite. Naismith in particular doesn't look remotely up to this level.

If you'd like to explain in detail how this is the case, go ahead, and I'll get back to you at full time - regardless of the result - to tell you you're wrong.

Just me who thought Ameobi was decent? You're causing us problems every time the ball's in our box, especially in the air.

No better than us though if we take the game to the opposition for once instead of sitting back and trying to stop them playing. We need them to have to react to us, you know, front-foot football and all that.... We're just too good, too good that it's 1-1 and have looked an absolute mess whenever you've got the ball into our box.

Very good watch for the neutral, this. Not sure who wins the battle of incompetent defending, it'll take something special to trump your goal.

As an aside, what's Sky's fascination with televising this fixture? Feels like it's been on shitloads in recent years.

This is all set up for him to have a stormer, I'm very aware of that. You can always count on Heitinga for a mistake, too. Dude, I appreciate the sentiments, but there's no silver lining anywhere at the moment Your team feel like Barcelona with our injuries, inept manager, transfer saga's, and rock bottom morale. Barcelona... Hmm.... Phil Busquets.

This is all set up for him to have a stormer, I'm very aware of that. You can always count on Heitinga for a mistake, too. Dude, I appreciate the sentiments, but there's no silver lining anywhere at the moment Your team feel like Barcelona with our injuries, inept manager, transfer saga's, and rock bottom morale. It's definitely not a case of nice sentiments, tbh. I don't agree at all with the implication that we're just going to turn up and win - that's an overestimation of our ability and an underestimation of yours. You have plenty to trouble us and a lot worse teams than the one you're putting out have caused us problems this season. We're not at all that hard to get at. Expecting a very tough game and a win would be an excellent result. This can easily go either way.

This is all set up for him to have a stormer, I'm very aware of that. You can always count on Heitinga for a mistake, too.

Not an official line up, I should say. Will find out any minute now.

Howard Jagielka Heitinga Distin Baines Naismith Osman Neville Pienaar Fellaini Jelavic Apparently.

Vince McMahon. Those rumours a couple of years ago really were true.

What the flying fuck? I'm sorry, those are preposterous odds.

5/2 for a Newcastle win now, pretty ridiculous odds tbh.

A broomstick would give us problems. The defence get fuck all protection from midfield. You won't even have to create that many chances to score, of that I'm fairly sure.

I'd give you our likely team but it's all a bit up in the air currently - whether Baines/Pienaar play, where he plays Fellaini, whether Heitinga/Naismith/Hitz/Anichebe start.

Guess at least two of them (Baines for sure) will be starting, though. As I say I think my gut reaction is Pienaar will be out, Baines I think Moyes will absolutely give until the last minute to try and push him through. But there's no getting away from the fact that if they're both out it's a fucking massive blow and will surely give you a huge boost. So, either definitely out or very possibly out are Baines, Pienaar, Coleman, Mirallas, Gibson. That's our first choice left side, right side, and starting central midfielder out. You could make a damn good team with the injured players from both sides.

January wildcard time, with another wildcard to play before the end of the season if I so wish. I'm going to do well to not put RVP in. Simply gets too many points not to.

I'm sorry, 11/8 DNB with Baines and Pienaar big doubts - head has to go before heart when it comes to betting.

Oh, right, well, since you really need them and I'll have a word with David tonight. We need them if we have any aspirations of a top 4 finish, but I don't think we'll get them. Just one of those games I've a bad feeling about and can just see your players putting in a shift and with our chaotic defending, you'll almost certainly at least score once, if not twice. Is Pienaar likely to play? Also what's this about Baines not playing? Frankly, I don't know. I'd have thought if they were definitely out then something would have been said by now. My gut instinct says they'll play, maybe with Pienaar being more of a doubt than Baines.

Err, Jelavic looked absolutely outstanding against Chelsea from the highlights i saw on MOTD and looked very unlucky not to have scored a hat trick. We are gash at defending to begin with without having to reshuffle again due to Simpsons broken toe. QPR aprt, we cannot buy a clean sheet. There was a marked improvement in Jelavic's performance vs Chelsea, true. But generally he's just not looked the same this season. Don't talk to me about clean sheets mind. At least you have actually had a couple in recent memory.

Oh, right, well, since you really need them and I'll have a word with David tonight. We need them if we have any aspirations of a top 4 finish, but I don't think we'll get them. Just one of those games I've a bad feeling about and can just see your players putting in a shift and with our chaotic defending, you'll almost certainly at least score once, if not twice.

Jelavic has been anything but a monster for the past 10 or so games. It's all set up for a Ba winner as a leaving gift, with post-match comments of "wow, what a team performance, never saw that coming!" fully expected.

Newcastle DNB @ 11/8?