Sean

Yeah Zefi is the one I'm waiting for the most. Didn't our ITK say it's already done? He looks a real talent.

What an absolute fanny he is.

We don't need 3 points though. Calm the fuck down, the season hasn't even started and I feel some are close to losing it already.

Lascelles has got that lengthy Fifa running style man, rapid once he's finally got going

4 and a half years younger than Schar, a great age for the here and now and gives us time to find or develop a younger CB.

The more I think about our preseason the more disappointed I get with Targett. He should have came back one of the fittest, and like Anderson and Gordon have done, given the manager a real selection headache. Instead, he's looked slow and off the pace and has instead ensured Dan Burn has the left back position locked down for the foreseeable. This is with the massive caveat that I don't have access to the data and knowledge the club have, but I'd be interested to know what his fitness is like compared to before his layoff last season. From the outside looking in, and with the way FFP works, I'd probably look to sell him in order to be able to bring in the best left back we can find.

I must be the only one who's gonna enjoy this going by the comments. Honestly couldn't give a fuck who narrates it and it's not gonna spoil anything

He's the sort of player who reminds you that football is a simple game.

Couldn't give a fuck about his fitness, start this lad against Villa.

No. Everything is bad forever.

If he can get his end product right he could be frightening.

These new rules are shit. Games back on though, 1-1.

He might be begging for him to be replaced

It's infinitely more than Villa paid for Tielemans. Worrying.

Someone get down there and record it for us impatient souls..

If we don't sign a RW I think Gordon will make that position his own.

Looks like he'll be a great signing, Squad is starting to come together nicely, so many talented and versatile players all with the right attitude. What's not to love.

Buying a quality specialist left back doesn't automatically mean Burn won't ever play there. We are weak in numbers on the left side of defence (Burn, Targett, Dummett to cover 2 positions, and of course Dummet doesn't even count really). It would also give us another option, and another dimension when needed. Got to think the club will be trying their hardest to make something happen here.

Youtube suggests he's gonna be the next Messi:

FIFA goal.

Not shooting the messenger but if one of their objectives is to appoint Mourinho then that's a fucking shit objective.

As a squad we scored 68 league goals last season. I think we need to aim for 80+ goals next season. We might not achieve it but we should get close. Our (now) front 6 for this season scored 60 PL goals between them last season (Wilson 18, Isak 10, Barnes 13, Almiron 11, Murphy 4, Gordon 4). Assuming we don't add another attacker, although I'd love Zaniolo, I think he'd be perfect for us, 60 is bang on target for the attackers. Midfield is where we need to improve. We scored 8 goals from midfield last season, if you count Joelinton as a winger. This season I see him playing in midfield, so we have Joelinton (6 last season), Bruno (4), Tonali (2 in Serie A), Willock (3), Longstaff (1), Anderson and Miley. We really need around 20 goals from that group. Then goals from defence. For the love of god can someone teach them how to attack a dead ball 3 goals is a poor return. 1 from Burn, 1 from Schar and 1 from Trippier. On that note, we must have only scored 1 single direct free kick all season? Plenty of room for improvement here. We should be able to count on 5 goals minimum from the defence as a group, especially if that includes our main free kick taker. Hopefully any new defenders we bring in will help in this regard. From the numbers, it seems like we don't need another winger/attacker. I'd still love to see a real top quality player come in to take that RW spot though.

Are you contracted to buy the ticket or can you wait to find out the price and location and then bin it off? Going to get really messy this.

He's also vital to us. Something that ASM wasn't.

The only problem with the way added time is done at the moment, is the blatant double standards evidenced by Liverpool as the most obvious case, getting 9 minutes against us, and something like 18 minutes in one game towards the end of the season (only when they need the time of course). This will just make that problem worse.