When you log on, guys, try we-pay-your-wages.com

[Delima]

Hopefully our players or the manager don't log on to N-O. There are quite a number of posters here who enjoy abusing them. Rich or poor, I thought we should always maintain respects for people. Criticism is different from plain abuse.

 

Shepherd being an exception, of course.

 

The Times

 

Millwallonline

 

When you log on, guys, try we-pay-your-wages.com

 

Talking online to supporters is fine - but players should be ready to take some abuse

 

Rod Liddle

 

THE MILLWALL striker, Darren Byfield, has attempted to close the vast gulf that exists between footballers and fans by logging on to the supporters’ independent website, MillwallOnline, and trying to engage people in rational, good-humoured conversation. It is a story worth telling for the sheer nobility of the enterprise and its, erm, predictable outcome.

 

Byfield posted a message under the name of “babyboy” (the endearment used, apparently, by his girlfriend Jamelia). “Darren Byfield here,” he wrote. “Fire some questions.” The first two he received were: “Why does it always rain on me?” and “Explain the theory of relativity, please.” Then there were one or two about Jamelia and the stuff she does, or doesn’t do and which I can’t really go into here. But the lad was undaunted. No, he said, ask me stuff about Millwall. But the trouble is, nobody really believed it was Darren Byfield and so the remainder of the questions concerned ways that the striker could prove that he was who he said he was, questions that made him increasingly exasperated.

 

Eventually it was agreed that before the start of a game against Blackpool he would run up and kick the post twice, as a signal that it was indeed He. Sure enough, just before kick-off, Byfield trotted all the way back from the centre circle and kicked the post twice, beaming at the Millwall supporters. So it was him! And then someone pointed out that Byfield always kicks the post twice before the start of a game; it’s a superstition of his. So we were back where we started. Eventually the poor chap had to ring a local paper and explain that it wasn’t a wind-up, it really was Darren Byfield talking to the fans, please believe me now, etc. Even then, the story was still doubted.

 

He’d taken a fair amount of stick on the message boards, long before he logged on. He was accused of playing with a most unMillwall like languor, with a disinterested expression on his face. On one occasion, before Christmas, as he disdained to chase down a loose ball from a corner, a friend of mine shouted out, rather harshly: “It’s okay, Byfield, feel free to join in at any time.” Byfield, with some justification, put this perceived indifference down to his having just returned from a serious injury. But then there were the press reports about him wanting, with increasing desperation, to move to a club in the midlands — before clamouring to move to Swansea. Someone give that man a rail ticket and an atlas, we all thought.

 

But matched against this is the unequivocal fact that he is by far and away the most talented player Millwall possess and that if it wasn’t for his 13 goals (and Richard Shaw’s excellence in defence), we’d be still in the bottom four, rather than casting an ill-advisedly optimistic eye at the playoffs. Byfield, we all know, could play at a rather higher level.

 

And then, after the Byfield business, someone else came on the message board using the name “CherryZ1” and claiming to be our goalkeeper, Lenny Pidgeley. Again, he wasn’t believed. Is there anything I can do on the pitch, something unique or highly unusual, that would convince you all that I am Lenny Pidgeley, he asked. Yes, came one reply, you could catch the ******* ball for once, you useless ****. And then kick it somewhere on the pitch, rather than into touch, added another correspondent. There was then a short debate about whether this would prove conclusively that it was Lenny Pidgeley, or if it would prove conclusively that it wasn’t.

 

CherryZ1 hasn’t been back, anyhow - and I sort of hope it wasn’t Lenny (although I’ve been told on fairly good authority that it was).

 

Byfield’s decision to engage with the fans was, I reckon, a brave and democratic act, to be wholeheartedly commended. He answered all of the sensible questions - even the fairly hostile ones - with great grace and without whining. But I do wonder a little quite what he expected the reaction to be.

 

The mistake people make about our celebrity culture is that the public is somehow in awe of the celebrities. That because they earn vast sums of money and appear on television all the time we must look up to them and respect their achievements. But in my experience, there is no awe at all, just a general murmur of amusement which is sometimes good-natured and sometimes rather less so. Their job is to entertain us - and that’s about it.

 

Certainly, that is the way we view our footballers down at The Den; we will cheer them and encourage them and, on rare occasions, afford them a standing ovation. But we are not possessed of the notion that they are Nietszchean supermen, set apart from the rest of us by their extraordinary talent. You can’t think that if you’re Millwall and sitting halfway up the Division One table, having recently lost 5-2 at home to Leyton Orient. But I don’t think it would change very much if, through some bizarre accumulation of propitious circumstances, we were suddenly poised to claim a Champions League place, either. We would have the same exquisite lack of deference to the people whose extravagant wages we pay. We would like them, but only up to a point. It is not primarily the players to whom we owe our allegiance.

 

So, it’s nothing personal, Darren - and it was nice of you to try. But the reaction would be exactly the same if Cristiano Ronaldo signed for Millwall and decided to visit the message boards to engage with the supporters. Actually, it would be a lot worse, if we’re honest.

 

Flouncing, diving, pouting little moppet. Step-over this, mate.

[Dave]

 

Class article.

[GeordieDazzler]

Remeber 'Ramage' on tyne talk

[Cajun]

I am Duffer btw, to prove it everytime something doesnt go my way on Thursday I will stand there with my hands in the air with a spacka look on my face. If possible I will also try and run into their defenders a few times and fall over if I get near the box.

[Guest Invicta_Toon]

Hey Shola!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

fuck off you dozy cunt

[gray]

i would 100% log on here if i was at the club. doubt id post though, or even register.

[madras]

recently there have been some good articles about footballers,the david james one and the sibierski one spring to mind which remind you they are people.

[dcmk]

And then, after the Byfield business, someone else came on the message board using the name “CherryZ1” and claiming to be our goalkeeper, Lenny Pidgeley. Again, he wasn’t believed. Is there anything I can do on the pitch, something unique or highly unusual, that would convince you all that I am Lenny Pidgeley, he asked. Yes, came one reply, you could catch the ******* ball for once, you useless ****. And then kick it somewhere on the pitch, rather than into touch, added another correspondent. There was then a short debate about whether this would prove conclusively that it was Lenny Pidgeley, or if it would prove conclusively that it wasn’t.

 

mackems.gif

[Skirge]

I would not be supprised at all if some Toon players had been on here for a look, its ny far the most popular toon site/forum.

Human nature if you think people are talking about you, then you want to know what they are saying.

[Tom_NUFC]

I've seen those problems before. I used to go on a fans website for a band a few years back, and every now and then users would come on claiming to band members. There was always doubt about whether it really was them, although a lot of people just went along with it as they always seemed plausible. It did actually turn out to be them, because a few people (including me) used to blag interviews with them via their press officer before gigs.

 

Of course there were wind up merchants as well, people pretending, so you can't really blame people for being sceptical.

[Guest Knightrider]

I think at least one footballer will look at their club's fans' website, from most clubs, I know I would - they all have net access, or most of them I bet.

[brummie]

We have, at Villa, a member of the current board (Generak Charles Krulak, Lerner's right hand man, basically) who posts on the three main independent Villa message boards. Basically, it is a way of getting questions to the club, and supplying them with suggestions (an impressive number of which have actually been picked up on already). The first time he started posting, obviously nobody believed it was him, until a few phone calls from Lerner's people confirmed it really was him.

 

Since then there have been a few meetings with representatives from the various message boards (plus other supporters organisations), and it really does seem to work as an informal link between the fans and the clubs, something I hope gets replicated at other clubs.

 

They also use this link to occasionally drop nuggets of information with the supporters before they reach the press (recent kit deal with Nike is one which springs to mind), which is nice.

 

This sort of interaction is pretty cheap and easy for clubs to engage in, and compared to the Stalinist Ellis days is a breath of fresh air. Hopefully more clubs will start doing it.

 

[Ally]

Thats quality Brummie. Can't see Douglas Hall on here though can you?

[Guest Gemmill]

General Charles Krulak?   Is he off the A-Team?

[Guest Knightrider]

We have, at Villa, a member of the current board (Generak Charles Krulak, Lerner's right hand man, basically) who posts on the three main independent Villa message boards. Basically, it is a way of getting questions to the club, and supplying them with suggestions (an impressive number of which have actually been picked up on already). The first time he started posting, obviously nobody believed it was him, until a few phone calls from Lerner's people confirmed it really was him.

 

Since then there have been a few meetings with representatives from the various message boards (plus other supporters organisations), and it really does seem to work as an informal link between the fans and the clubs, something I hope gets replicated at other clubs.

 

They also use this link to occasionally drop nuggets of information with the supporters before they reach the press (recent kit deal with Nike is one which springs to mind), which is nice.

 

This sort of interaction is pretty cheap and easy for clubs to engage in, and compared to the Stalinist Ellis days is a breath of fresh air. Hopefully more clubs will start doing it.

 

 

Quality stuff. It seems illogical for any club (or business) not to discuss things with fans, to open their door to them if you like, anyway. To me. As you say it is free, builds good relations and in the main, fans know their stuff and good feedback can only help operations. More should do it, I agree.

[brummie]

General Charles Krulak?   Is he off the A-Team?

 

Better than that, he's a former Commanding Officer of the United States Marine Corps. He'd call in air support and wipe out the A Team before they'd even got out of their gay van.

 

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/0/0f/Charles_C._Krulak.jpg/200px-Charles_C._Krulak.jpg

[Ally]

Do we still have that Fans Committee btw? Or whatever name it went by.

[Guest Gemmill]

General Charles Krulak?   Is he off the A-Team?

 

Better than that, he's a former Commanding Officer of the United States Marine Corps. He'd call in air support and wipe out the A Team before they'd even got out of their gay van.

 

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/0/0f/Charles_C._Krulak.jpg/200px-Charles_C._Krulak.jpg

 

You should ask him those questions Tim asked Gareth on the Office.

[Ally]

General Charles Krulak?   Is he off the A-Team?

 

Better than that, he's a former Commanding Officer of the United States Marine Corps. He'd call in air support and wipe out the A Team before they'd even got out of their gay van.

 

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/0/0f/Charles_C._Krulak.jpg/200px-Charles_C._Krulak.jpg

 

You should ask him those questions Tim asked Gareth on the Office.

 

'So you'd take a man from behind?'

[brummie]

General Charles Krulak?   Is he off the A-Team?

 

Better than that, he's a former Commanding Officer of the United States Marine Corps. He'd call in air support and wipe out the A Team before they'd even got out of their gay van.

 

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/0/0f/Charles_C._Krulak.jpg/200px-Charles_C._Krulak.jpg

 

You should ask him those questions Tim asked Gareth on the Office.

 

When he first appeared there was a sequence of "could you kill a man with your bare hands"" style questions. He's quite an entertaining bloke, to be fair, although almost everything you ask him triggers off some kind of USMC connection. He likes to refer to the fact he's been shot twice. He's very American, but has lived over here for several years so seems to understand us.

 

Some wag pointed out that he may have done several tours of Vietnam, but he's probably never been somewhere with as many hostile, armed locals as Aston before.

[Guest Gemmill]

General Charles Krulak?   Is he off the A-Team?

 

Better than that, he's a former Commanding Officer of the United States Marine Corps. He'd call in air support and wipe out the A Team before they'd even got out of their gay van.

 

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/0/0f/Charles_C._Krulak.jpg/200px-Charles_C._Krulak.jpg

 

You should ask him those questions Tim asked Gareth on the Office.

 

When he first appeared there was a sequence of "could you kill a man with your bare hands"" style questions. He's quite an entertaining bloke, to be fair, although almost everything you ask him triggers off some kind of USMC connection. He likes to refer to the fact he's been shot twice. He's very American, but has lived over here for several years so seems to understand us.

 

Some wag pointed out that he may have done several tours of Vietnam, but he's probably never been somewhere with as many hostile, armed locals as Aston before.

 

Fair play to the bloke for what he's doing mate.  It could have fell flat on its face and he could have ended up looking a total arsehole.  He's obviously doing the "hearts and minds" bit a bit more successfully than his mates in Iraq.

 

I love that he brings things round to military references all the time though.  Like a war-ravaged Swiss Tony.  "Running a football club is a lot like mounting an offensive behind enemy lines/snapping a man's spinal cord with your bare hands/etc."

 

As for getting shot twice, just mention 50 Cent.  He'll sharp shut up.

[Dave]

You lot should do some of the chants from Full Metal Jacket at the match and see what he thinks.

 

'I don't know but I've been told,

Eskimo pussy is mighty cold'

 

etc.

[Dave]

'1, 2, 3, 4,

We love the Marine Corp'

[brummie]

You lot should do some of the chants from Full Metal Jacket at the match and see what he thinks.

 

'I don't know but I've been told,

Eskimo pussy is mighty cold'

 

etc.

 

I'm too much of a peace loving hippy myself and more likely to resurrect some old Vietnam era protest chanting .

 

"hey! hey! General K!

how many kids did you kill today?

and whilst you're at it, can you do something about the standard of catering in the Trinity Road stand? it is awful"

[Dave]