Theregulars

I work at the England Cricket Board - the new kits are all pretty good, although the Test kit is more like whites Henman would wear at Wimbledon. The Twenty20 one is basically just a rehash of a Liverpool kit.

The season ended about 2 weeks ago. Players, managers, maybe board members, I don't know - they're all taking holidays. Let's not panic yet. Thus far the Ashley regime has appeared very well thought-out - like them or not, the appointments like Wise, Jimenez and Vetere suggest that we're putting a sensible structure in place. Let's get the chairman thing sorted out first. Ashley and the board will know who Keegan and the others want. They've made it very clearly that the last regime left us in massive debt and gone are the days of paying over the odds for players and silly wages, and spot on too if you ask me. This is going to be a summer of hard negotiations for transfers. We're not just going to wave a chequebook at some stop-gap foreign name. It didn't work before. I'm sure these is some interest in the kid but perhaps they are waiting to see what others bid. If someone else matches the 16 million Euros, maybe we'll increase. Until then, why would we? And until other offers don't start materialising, Gala are going to hold out.

Some people on here are mad - here you all are, stating clearly that you realise agents and other clubs will mention other teams being interested to jack up the price. Yet as soon some are mentioned, everyone starts getting tetchy. Here's the thing. We may be interested in signing him, no bid has been made, he would be interested in coming to England, the price seems to be 16million Euros. Those are the facts, it's not too interesting. It's not even June yet.

Is there anyway we can do a deal with the jail and have Alan Smith sit out Barton's sentence for him? Everyone's a winner that way.

Why do we have so many players who were good somewhere else or who should be good on paper, who all turn out to be useless as soon as they pull on a Toon shirt? It's maddening. Duff belongs in this category. He's had two years, done nothing, has shown no signs of improvement, it's mad that he kept Zoggy out of the team for a while. Get rid if we can make any money out of him. There's no point keeping him as a squad player because then he isn't likely to achieve the improvement he needs to in order to justify his presence here. I'm sure if we keep Zoggy he's a better prospect and we can pick up a better left winger anyway, and Milner's more useful than he is on that side too. No brainer.

As soon as he came on I said to my mate "game over now". He's utter tripe. His two piss-poor clearances actually led to the second goal as well. I don't know how many times I've aired my view on just how utterly useless this pillock is. He can't tackle without fouling, can't shoot without missing, and can't pass without giving away. He's supposedly a good header of the ball but I think he beat Terry once. The gap between him and Viduka that was demonstrated yesterday is immense, and I think it's absolutely no coincidence how much weaker we looked when the changed was made. Duff is also toss for what it's worth, disgrace that he came on at LW and Zoggy was stuck in at LB. I think Duff will be off, but I don't see Smith leaving as he's happy here and Keegan seems to like him. Roll on more of those performances next year Alan.

Don't see how you can talk about Blackburn being a one-man team. They're a very good example of how you can achieve relative success with a good team. Sure, Friedel's a good goalkeeper, but KD and the Spuds only notice because both of theirs are bollocks. Santa Cruz, McCarthy, Bentley, Pedersen, Samba, Nelsen and Warnock to name but a few have all played major parts in making them the team they are, and credit to Mark Hughes for it. He's assembled them.

I think he's right to point out that some of the criticism was unfair - not when he made such ridiculous errors, he deserved that - but when he did play well or do something good he was never really praised for it. Not once when he had a good game, and I'm sure there were a few, did a paper or a TV journo say "Bramble actually played well today". Still think he was error-prone to an unnerving extent and wanted him gone long before he eventually left, but the media treatment was clearly over the top. That said, Steve Bruce doesn't seem to rate him and this a man happy with a strike trio of Heskey, Marcus Bent and Marlon King. Hmmmmmmmm.

Voted Smith, Amdy Faye and Boumsong. Would have voted for Smith 3 times if it was an option, mind.

Shearer completing his hat-trick to beat Leicester 4-3 at SJP in the very last minute. Think we were 3-1 down with about 5 minutes left.

When Asprilla completed his hat-trick against Barcelona.

I detest Arsenal. Ever since Wenger took over most players there turn into one or more of divers, fakers, niggly foulers, foul-mouthed tossers, players who constantly hassle the referee and usually get away with it and just general cheats, including some bright lights along the way like Ian Wright and Patrick Vieira. Pricks. This season the baton is being carried by Eboue and Flamini. I also hate Everton, mainly because their players on paper, up until this season at least, are largely shite yet they still do well. It's not so bad anymore, but when they first got into the champions league on the back of fouling, bruising and just general attempting to batter teams down it was annoying. I also hate Tim Cahill. I've also never forgiven them for that time they beat us 2-1 at their place when Gravesen committed one of the most ridiculous fouls of all time on Bernard at 1-1, got away with it and then they won a penalty which won the game and effectively stumped our title challenge that year. Bah. I also hate Boro and Fulham because their presence in the EPL is pointless.

Alan Smith is not a decent player to bring on. He's not a decent player to start, have on the bench, in you squad, in your club, near your training ground... he's bought on mercifully with ten minutes left when we are winning comfortably to justify his incomprehensible hype, transfer fee and wages. He's piss poor, has been all season, no rational NUFC fan could claim anything otherwise having watched him this campaign. Sell, sell, sell. Useless. Don't really care about Duff - would like to see him in this new team to see if he does OK, but hasn't really done much at all. Think Milner in Geremi's role could be canny.

I honestly think it's a lot down to the fact we finally dropped Alan Smith.

Man shirt disasters... I got 17 Bellamy a week before he changed to ten, 27 woodgate a few months for he changed briefly to number 6 and moved to madrid. I did once get one saying 0 Souness.

by unless I mean unlike. My bad.

I still think he's awesome but in three years he's never been fit enough to have a good run in the team and kick on. Starting to run out of patience. Think Keegan will keep him though because he clearly likes what he brings to the team, and I think KK could get the best out of him to be fair, unless the other excuses for managers he's had to work under.

Man I got Viana on the back of my shirt once. And Kluivert.

Fairly sure it will be the same team as yesterday, perhaps with Emre or N'Zogbia coming in for Barton (both very preferable). Would also not like to see Geremi in the team as he's crap.

Also somehow, some way it's Alan Smith's fault.

How can we hide our shit central midfield? Ummmmmm..... not pick the same players who make it shit week in week out? I might be onto something but I'm not entirely sure.

You just know he's going to play tonight. Milner's injured so Smith will be given that right-wing role he's so adept at filling. Based on all the games Keegan has been in charge since his return, how can he not possibly look to try Viduka-Martins ahead of both of them? I'm trying to see Keegan in a positive light but it's getting horribly difficult. Perhaps after another 0-3 tonight with Smith managing one shot into the crowd he might realise, but I'm not holding my breath. I look away every time he has the ball. Maybe if we all did that live, observing an eerie silence at SJP and away grounds, somebody would get the message. Or something. Oh God just get Alan Smith out of my team.

Do tell me, just where has Smith's scrapping and defending from the front got us so far? NOWHERE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. Wake up and smell the rotting turd that is Alan Smith's NUFC career. If we really want to defend from the front, play Faye up front. I daresay he'd score more goals than Smith anyway (and he has done from the back). Scrapping and fighting is what we need in defence and central midfield (although I still don't advocate Smith here, as his scrapping is useless anyway), wingers, one CM and strikers over creativity and goals. THERE IS NO NEED FOR SMITH TO PLAY. EVER.

Think Wilko was probably lower during all his time out injured.