Beren

Good one. Extra marks for a well-taken penalty and imposing himself more in the second half, otherwise he would have been a four too.

Krul 5 Simpson 7 Colo 5 Taylor 6 Enrique 7.5 Barton 7 Tiote 6.5 Nolan 6 Gutierrez 6.5 Shola 6 Loven 4 [/iMO]

As usual, the truth is somewhere between the two extremes! He did well to get into good positions, did well at times with his defending and passing - but often looked ragged, lethargic and fluffed a few good chances (not to deny Foster the credit he deserves). Meaningless friendly (for all intensive purposes) though, no reliable conclusions to be drawn from it. His goalscoring record for us in the league counts for a lot though. Worth his place in the starting XI next season unless we suddenly get very rich.

Elbowed Jerome after four minutes. Good goal though. Reasonable performance.

Everton are hilarious. So consistent. Relegation form first half of the season. Title-winning second half.

We've played better and lost. Three points is great don't get me wrong, but that was pretty poor. About three quarters of the league don't give a shit right now, so who cares though. Enrique was brilliant today. Felt sorry for him that all his good work was met by Nolan, Shola and Lovenkrands who have all the agility of a brick wall. I swear they can't lift their feet above hip height. Oh well.

Returns 95€. Shouldn't have done the (-1), though. Nice one David! Going to take a football betting holiday for the rest of the season. No one's arsed so anything can happen.

TIOTE

"Tweak my nipples like this, while she rubs"

Fuck's sake, Neil.

If Williamson had let that ball bounce

Would quite like another thumping. These bastids were so smug when they beat us 5-1 in the cup yonks ago. I hold grudges, dammit!

Foster is playing insane. Can't believe we're 2-0 up.

He didn't score but that looked quality from Nolan! Cool as fuck

Going for the kill from the looks of it. Brum will sat back and defend... more so.

Decent save tbf, but should have hit across.

The enigma that is Shola. Greatest entertainer we've ever seen man. Fuck off Messi

Quality pen

Shola taking it

Colo

Yay! Hate that twat Ridgewell.

Ticket prices for these matches should be severely discounted, man.

I'm fairly sure I could play up front for NUFC, you know.