Kitman

And for believing everything the Sun prints........priceless

If it is Redknapp, I wonder what effect the strain of managing us will have. He'll probably be more purple in the face and acquire some more amusing twitches. Or maybe his face will just melt completely.

Not one of those papers is notable for printing the truth when it comes to football

Does it say whether there's a bungchest?

Shouldn't that be: Arry Redknapp Manager of Noo-karsel ? Won't believe till I see the press release. And even then I won't believe it till he's sacked.

If it's Redknapp he'll sign 11 players by the end of the transfer window. In the summer he'll sign another 11. No-one will leave. Before long our squad will be about 60 strong. That's what Harry does.

HAWAY MAN CHTT!!! There are enough doom mongers & sarcastic people in operation THE BOARD NEEED'S YOU POSTIVE VIBES!!!! Is that avatar photo-shopped? Harry looks like a human blackcurrant !

Just cos SSN report something doesn't make it true. I'm not getting downcast until the club announce who they've chosen.

Could we really be that stupid? Could Redknapp really be that stupid? SSN must be making this up.

Possibly. But they'd forget about it for the inauguration which is the important thing.

The bit about "going through proper channels" may also refer to Jose as he is supposed to stay out of EPL for this season and Mort will need to negotiate with Chelski. Has anyone mentioned Gordon Strachan yet. My Celtic mate seems a bit concerned that we have been sniffing around Mr Strachan. I think we should be the ones to be concerned if what he says is true

He seems to have sorted out the injury problems at the club. Plus the training facilities now have great indoor/outdoor flow thanks to the Feng Shui consultant

This. We' re going to get a bumming imo

Whenever I've seen Portsmouth (on the telly) they've been pretty good to watch

I think if you've paid 450 quid for a season ticket, not to mention the cost of away games, to be bored shitless you've got the right to be impatient. People will put up with it if the team wins but they won't if they see them lose trying to stop the opposition from playing. The paying customers are the ones that got Allardyce sacked imo - they want to see the team win or they want entertainment. The teams you mention are far more entertaining than us this season at least imo, and shown more ambition in their football, even if their points tally isn't significantly better.

You'd hope they have more intelligence about the process than the last Board. You'd hope they might even ask some people who know something about football....respected football insiders like Sir Bobby, not the blokes standing behind Ashley at the game

*Climbs on chair and puts noose around neck *

If you were the Feng Shui expert or the Tai Chi instructor, you'd have packed your case and called the taxi already

Please God you're right *Climbs down off chair and takes noose from around neck *

Not a bad punt. Experienced, successful, available. Also bug eyed, boring and with a dodgy ticker though.

After a run of moderate results, after which we narrowly fail to qualify for Europe, the caretaker manager will be made permanent. No wait, no one would be that stupid.

Nightmare list of available candidates: Steve McLaren David O'Leary Glenn Hoddle George Graham Trevor Francis Graeme Souness Why can't we give Souness another crack? All he needed was time

Potential I suppose. Don't think even that would get him off his arse for an interview tbh. Cushy number, loved by all, good funds, good form, new stadium on its way, backed 100% throughout the club and lastly and very much the be all, he's at home. He sees himself as an old guy settled in his area with his family and likes it there. He's said this a few times, i doubt he'd go any further North than London, and that would only be for the England job. This. I can't see Redknapp leaving Portsmouth, he's very settled there.

Mort is the grim reaper in Terry Pratchett's discworld novels http://www.au.lspace.org/ftp/images/bookcovers/uk/mort-1.jpg Mortum is the Latin word for death iirc

We've picked up Butt and Smith from Man Utd's bin end sale. I'm sure doing the same with Spurs would be a great success