brummie

I love passing football and playing the game the right way as much as the next man, but that fucking endless short passes around the area, as if you're only prepared to score after at least 20 passes gets right on my tits after a bit.

Come on, Arsenal. Although let's also see some long term injuries picked up along the way, please.

That Billy Jones bloke runs like he's got orthopaedic shoes on or something.

The presence of John O'Shea is like Arsenal having an extra man.

You'll be alright. It isn't going to be a particularly enjoyable day, mind.

Good signing. 2.5m Can't complain

Yeah, what a low-rent arse licker he is.

I can't, either. I think this is mostly because, when you are emotionally involved in it all (ie, a Newcastle fan), yes, you are more aware than others of how shit your team is, but i think you also tend to build up other clubs to things they are not. I've seen a decent amount of Hull this season, and they are terrible, no fight, no nothing. They're two points behind you, in a relegation spot, and there is one match to play. Not only do they need to beat Man United, you also need to lose at home to West Ham - that's West Ham who, as well as looking shite, have clearly been on the beach since about Christmas. I am not saying you're all panicking for nothing, but if you try to look at it less emotionally, your situation is not as bad as you think it is. Nothing like.

Catts for me, like.

I think you're right, it's just that there is a point at which something looks *so* incompetent, so arsewarpingly horribly stupid, that you start to think, surely, surely this can't be an accident, all this stupidity? Surely it is being driven by some malevolent spirit?

re the table when Pardew left. I know I keep saying this, but from the point of view of one supporting a team that has struggled all season, I find your descent into the abyss absolutely staggering. I barely noticed you around the relegation zone till relatively recently, and certainly considered the chances of you getting into the struggle to be pretty much zero not that long ago. I know things were far from great before you started this descent, but I genuinely think that it is such a descent, and so fast, that it actually looks like someone at the wheel of the ship has deliberately set course for a massive cluster of rocks. It is all so inept, I start to wonder whether it is possible for something like that to happen without someone actually making it go that way, as if there is someone actually masterminding the stupidity. I know football is built on rivalries and petty partisanship, as well as a mountain of schadenfreude, but sometimes you see a situation so bizarrely fucked up, so horrific, that it actually transcends all that shit and people start to feel genuine sympathy. I think a lot of neutrals will be thinking that looking at you now. It is utterly bizarre. It looks like someone - and it's not hard to guess who - is actually punishment fucking you, regardless of the cost to themselves. I don't think you'll go down, that's Hull's spot now, they have too much to do, but fuck me, the fact you're in this situation now is beyond bewildering.

I watched the whole Hull match, and I thought they looked pretty decent, to be honest. However, there's no way they'll beat Man United next week. They are done for. You, though, have put together an astonishing run of ineptitude to take one point from the last 30. I honestly think if there were another two games left, you'd go down. There aren't, though. You'll be alright.

Indeed. I've spent almost the whole season worrying about going down, and Newcastle were hardly in consideration till this recent run. Mind you, it's a run and a half, it is so bad.

Hull have been the better team at Spurs by a mile thus far.

Am a bit perturbed re how decent Hull are looking thus far.

Vlaar showing today a side of his game a lot of people don't think about. His propensity to have the mother of all stinkers. That's why he'll probably be playing for Southampton next year rather than Man United. That and his dreadful injury record. Lots of them were awful today, but he was super awful.

I imagine they'll stop smiling when they get a 200k fine for the pitch invasion, like we've been given today.

Trollhunter is a really good film.

All the Danish/Swedish TV shows I've seen just seem to be basically Geordie. I'm hoping that will mean I'm able to survive in Copenhagen/Malmo/Stockholm next month. I particularly like how Swedish for "police" is "polis". Whenever I see POLIS in Swedish dramas, I always think of the Glaswegian pronunciation of the word. Oh, and this is great. "And your pussy McKendrick thanks the sailor"

How frequently are the best Brazilians ones with "inho" endings on their name, though? Looks to me a pretty low percentage. Ronaldinho, Jairzinho. Who else?

What's your second one? Swedish? I don't know how Icelandic schools work (My apologies if you're not Icelandic, for some reason I just think you are ) My second language is Danish. Started learning Danish when I was 10 I think, and English 2 years later. They have changed it now so kids start first with English and then with Danish. German and French doesn't start until your 15-17. Frankly DISGRACEFUL your / you're confusion there. i am joking, of course, your English is genuinely better than that of most actual English people

By chance, I know of three Hull fans, and talking to them, every single one of them has said exactly the same thing about them - they have next to zero back bone and are incredibly fragile. They've all also said that they're done for now, following Saturday's result(s). I think when you're around the bottom (and we've been there for five years now), it is easy to fall into a trap of seeing a tough fixture everywhere when you get to the very end of the season, whereas if you can look at it with a bit more detachment, you see that there is a reason these teams are mooking around in 18th. Which is because they're not very good.

Like I said on another thread, unfortunately, as far as the media are concerned, you are in an absolute no-win situation. Pardew - it was always "they don't like him because he's not from the Geordie Nation" - which is an argument so utterly, utterly bereft of good sense, it is hardly worth responding to. After Pardew, Pardew starts to do ok at Palace - "see, they got what they wanted, and LOOK HOW THAT'S TURNING OUT!" Carver - gets the job, does abysmally, and now, whatever happens between now and the last game of the season, you'll be getting "They didn't want Pardew, so they drove him out. They wanted a Geordie in the job, and LOOK HOW THAT'S TURNING OUT! Now he's not good enough for them either!" (meanwhile, you're taking 1 point from 27, but that's not the real issue, is it?) Meanwhile, behind the scenes, Ashley is acting like Dr Evil, totally immune to anything that resembles heart or benevolence to the club, driven by money, money, money. Even if Carver takes you down, Ashley won't sell. He has a big enough cash mountain to sit it out, he'll just wait till you inevitably, at some point soon, come back up again. There's just no way he'd sell and take a "just gone down" sized financial hit on you. Even I as an outsider have spotted that you're in an absolutely no-win situation. The media will say things purely because they're all embedded in some sort of "be a sports journalist" app whereby they tap the club name into it and out come the predictable soundbites, regardless of how obviously halfwitted it is. We had very similar. Lambert loses 8 games in a row, lowest scoring rate in all European leagues, worst home run since 1874, all this shit, but do you know what, according to the media he was "doing a good job". Same with you now. You're basically fucked whatever happens. There is a pool of goodwill out there, and it is never, ever there for the supporters to drink from, it is always about the cosy football industry and associated establishment. Fans are just an afterthought.

Monk has done a great job. You've got to be impressed with that. Another sign tonight convincing me more that we're going to beat Arsenal, too.

I can't look at Stephen Taylor without remembering his face when he did that ridiculous "I'VE JUST BEEN SHOT" thing.