Ketsbaia

Sorry Colo, but I'd force you to stay. The press keep persisting with this, so clearly there's something wrong. What the hell could these 'personal reasons' be? Because he's suddenly went from a proud and happy captain to someone begging to go home. Very concerning

Their friendship is starting to creep me out tbh

He takes bets on whether the chef catches it in his hat. He's relentless!

He takes the 'oums' out of Boumsong, thats for sure.

Looking forward to Saturday, where he plays his first game for the club - you could say that it's Mathieu's Début-chy.

Financial apocalypse if we dare spend a million more - don't worry Ashley, we understand. Carry on

"Pardew said..." doesnt have much credibility anymore tbh

While we're in Rennes, lets buy M'Vila & Kana-Biyik.

We're so tight that even a centre back or striker isnt guaranteed, dont even think about backup left backs.

Why bother saying that? Fucking hell, Pards.

Our January is Demba Ba, so they've started early.

Chronicle is now saying that Remy only wants to join us, if he leaves

Demotivate? Because then Simpson will stop playing well? Ahhh right, ok.

I know a 'negative news is true, whilst positive news is probably false' mentality exists but maybe we're playing games with Marseille by showing we have plans if this doesn't go through. Maybe we're showing we're not desperate so don't try hiking the price up. Oh, who am I kidding?

All of us.

He'd be obscenely good for us but we simply HAVE to get some centre backs.

Can't wait for the Williamson digs

Don't need wingers, don't need strikers. So they buy Zaha, bloody typical.

Aubameyang

This wasn't how it was meant to be. Ba was meant to be shit there Well done to Swansea, I really hate how we treat the cups - we could easily have reached a semi by now with some effort.

A fine advert for alcohol. Bravo

Isn't that part of the 'Dove from Above' round?

Meant to be after Kader Mangane too, the type of big bastard that we could do with beside Coloccini.

Why spend £6m on a young Englishman when you can get French internationals for less?

Don't want the twat anyway