Neil

It certainly does make you wonder. In fact, you could go as far as to say that based on tonight's performance, they'd have to be very bad indeed.

Spineless Surrender II ON a mild Lisbon evening, there were sensational scenes as the playing staff of Everton Football Club simultaneously bent over and took a brutal penetration. As manager David Moyes barked useless orders from the sidelines, his team performed admirably in ther roles as waddling, lost penguins. Particularly symbolic was the rumour that before kick-off, Moyes rallied his troops with a call-to-arms of, "I'm getting sick of these late Thursday nights and actually, this whole Europe lark altogether. Go out there and do me proud..." More to follow.

careful, you may get told to get over it. In which case, replace Barry with Lescott.

And there's no doubt you can beat Chelsea if you play well. As has been apparent in your run, decisions seem to be going your way so I wouldn't be surprised at all if you go all the way. Wouldn't be surprised if you need a replay vs Reading like.

The West Brom defending here is beyond shambolic. Great goal from Sigurdsson to win it.

outstanding. I'm on a roll and again I assume you meant 2-1 to Inter? But well done.

Fuck's sake Villa. 1-1. brummie was spot on.

The goal really wasn't his fault. btw. Chelsea could be in trouble here because Hilario is laughably bad.

That's an uncharacteristic injury from Cech.

Inter have gone 4-4-3 according to Merson.

Balotelli coming on. Maybe Mourinho thinks he can get more than a one goal lead. Good to see some ambition.

Wow. Goals. Something I wasn't expecting from this game.

Well, going somewhat better than last night; howay Stoke.

It changes everything. There must be a space for a declining striker who specialises in slowly running about for 20 minutes at the end of the game and occassionally pop up with an impressively scuffed shot that trickles into the net for a goal that means nothing in the context of the game.

Villa ahead.

He shouldn't have fallen like that. But it was a penalty as long as night follows day.

How the hell wasn't it a penalty?

That was a penalty but it's infuriating seeing players try to win a penalty instead of actually sticking the ball in the net.

Spurs 1 up.

Got to agree with my old man about stuff like that - until players start getting red cards for such blatant attempts at cheating, it'll still be around. This ain't ending 11 v 11.

It wasn't a clever finish apparently, Milito's goal. Fuck off Clive, you truly are annoying.

Ridiculously good attempt.

Southgate.

West Brom 1-1 Reading after 10 minutes.