Interpolic

That's why he's captain.

Iain Dowie feels pretty. Yes oh so pretty. I feel pretty and witty and gay. And I pity any girl who isn't me today.

Why does a transfer involving Everton and Newcastle involve the Southern press in regards to fees? Why do you always go looking for an argument? The media have a lot of influence over a players value. He's seen as comedy Geordie defender, who looks like going for 6m when it should be double in the current market. Yeah but Crumpy Gunt said he heard it off his mate, and the press don't make up the fees anyway. Edit: ah soz, I see you're saying the media influence fees. I guess that's true but only to a degree. I agree with you that £6m would be low anyway: maybe he should be valued at upto about £10m at a push and Glenn Johnson was definitely overpriced but he is getting in the England team. That makes a difference. Doesn't matter what we think about valuations anyway cos he's worth whatever NUFC are willing to sell him for.

Would be typical of the way the club's being run into the ground. He gives a fuck, so I'd be gutted if he was allowed to leave.

Til "this is fictional". Then I started thinking something was a bit fishy.

Haha fucking hell, I got that off Wikipedia and this appeared under 'Future': http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mark_Viduka

Viduka stats for Newcastle: 07/08: played 28, scored 7 08/09: played 12, scored 0 Best of luck Fulham.

Brilliant work, hilarious.

YOu have been bullshitting all along and have not provided any evidence that you not been. It's time for you to end this torrent of utter shite that you posting. Relax.

And in theory, the best case scenario would be the club getting sold for 1p to a rich buyer with good intentions who's willing to take on the debt, the losses, the wages, and all the other shite that's connected with NUFC. Any sale for big money just benefits Mike Ashley. God, the idea that we should not be sold for less than £100m just to keep up appearances, I give up.

I don't think we should sell for £70m either. Its about status and pride as much as anything. If Ronaldo is worth more than our whole club than what does it say? One player for god sake. That's why Ashley holding out for the 100 is important for the club IMO. Don't wanna get on your back or owt, but that's one of the most mental things I've ever, ever read.

Premiership = wife material, Championship = dirty slag.

Yeah, it's part of the reason we're there, isn't it?

It's called trying to influence the game. If Newcastle win, we go home happy.

Swap Duff and Jonas round for a bit so that they're not repeatedly cutting inside.

I still don't get why everyone's going mental for him at Notts County, he's not even the manager and they haven't exactly splashed the cash. I think it's just because it's such an unusual appointment, given that he managed so many big clubs and England not so long ago. Also there's the general (justified) cynicism towards whether DoFs work in this country. It's just an unusual situation - I got the impression with Notts County's manager there it'll all end in tears.

The lass's mam is staying over so I couldn't hear Football Focus for the bloody hair drier, annoying as fuck.

Brilliant clip, that.

Aye right. It's difficult to take to a sycophantic yes-man gobshite who has no discernable qualities other than that he wouldn't look out of place at one of the greasy burger vans outside. Course you did, Jesus Christ. Stop speaking in the present tense you delusional fuckwit. And it's not about glamour - it's about putting a shift in because that's your job, a job you get well paid for and you're not better than. Kinnear defending Owen man, fuck's sake.

Bloody hell, Clem's approach to this evening: list every NUFC-related cliche in the book and ask people's opinion on it. Talentless prick, if he lives in this area then his lack of understanding is criminal.

This Clem bloke's a fucking gimp.

Most touchy religion ever. If that's an uninformed, throwaway comment on my behalf, so be it.

Absolutely agree, but he's a moron so he's bound to make his mind up on September 1st (but not before selling a good proportion of our players from a paper-thin squad). Ah well, at least we'll get to see some of Wise's youngsters first hand, eh.

THAN WHO?! Fred West?! Be careful there mate, you might start an internet rumour. Fred West with Harold Shipman backing. Press conference tomorrow at 3pm ITK It's ITV mate. Not being funny, you'll just have to get this sort of stuff right if the rumour's gonna take off.