Alan Pardew

I should apply for the Fulham gig. Just to get my name out there. A Championship job is probably more realistic for the King at this point I reckon. Not one of the shitty skint clubs though.

That was before I saw Eddies new signings on the pitch. Hardly my fault that Adam Elanga looks like he’s won a competition in the local supermarket when he’s on the pitch for you lot. Same with that striker from Brentford. Eddie needs to add more players who can play on the front foot and who can add that little extra quality on the ball you want as a manager. see ya later

I apologize lads. I’m just frustrated how it’s all unraveling a bit for Young Eddie.

Wissa and Elanga on. This is Eddies own undoing. Two useless twats he’s brought in for obscene amount of money.

Tuchel knew.

Sell this useless Italian clogger for the rebuild. Can’t do a 3 yard pass and couldn’t give two shits about you lot even though you basically saved his career.

Hull are shite. Just like the day I headbutted David Meyler. It was an easy win for us. See ya later.

No one likes him except you lot.

Sell this useless cunt for big money for Eddies rebuild!

Loves being on the telly that Taylor. Bald.

That Guimaraes fed up playing with these cloggers week in and week out.

Great lad Trippier. Likes a drink though.

That Murphy is one of the worst footballers to get that many PL appearances. Horrific.

Struggling against an injury riddled Forest who just lost a semifinal 0-4. Massive job ahead for Eddie. I worry.

Trippier on just 10 minutes too late. Eddie has lost the plot this season with his subs. Been shocking.