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Lee Clark's notebook


Kitman
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Some pages purporting to be from Lee Clark's coaching notebook have come into my possession  bluebiggrin.gif

 

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The gaffer told me to start this notebook.  “That’s what I did with everything I learned at Leyton Orient and Gillingham, and look at me now.”  Will help with me coaching course too.  Howay Clarky son!

 

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How to keep up spirits

 

Good lesson from the gaffer today.  He gets all the players in a line and says “Step forward all those who think they’re good enough to play on Saturday.....Not you Albert”.  Then everyone falls about laughing.  Albert Lucky’s keeping all wor spirits up!

 

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JOB PROMOTION!!!!!  Now I do the cones!

 

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Be Positive

 

Like the gaffer.  “Always be positive.  You must never talk about how you CANT do something” he says.  Saw this at the team meeting today.  “YOUR ALL A BUNCH OF CANTS” the gaffer shouted and walked out.

 

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ANOTHER JOB PROMOTION!!!!!  After Dyers accident, Terry Macs been taken off flags!  (remember the gaffer wants the flags spaced out proper like).

 

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Saw the gaffer looking in his Gillingham coaching notebook today ahead of the Sheffield game - working on the tactics.  Must ask the gaffer about that.

 

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BE CALM. The gaffer does not get nervous or angry.  Very important when it’s not going well - the gaffer says he’s very experienced at things not going well.  Your learning all the time Clarky son.

 

 

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Asked the gaffer about tactics after the Sheffield game.  He told us to piss off (try when he’s not angry?)  He called all the players CANTS again.  Also called Lucky a Spanish CANT.  BE POSITIVE!

 

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Keeping up spirits

 

The gaffer is brilliant at this.  The players always point and laugh at him when he goes past.  Must ask him what he says to make them do it.  They do it with Terry Mac too!

 

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Is going to the bookies part of coaching like?  Terry Mac says so but no-one else on the course does it.  Must ask the gaffer.

 

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What’s the point of Baba like?  Must ask the gaffer.

 

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Saw a brilliant coaching session with the first team today!  The gaffer worked on Titus passing.  “Long and short” he says over and over.  Coming on a treat.  Worked on Titus defending too.  Looked amazing!

 

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Overheard Gaffer calling Titus a useless long ball CANT.  Also called Lucky a useless Spanish CANT.  Also called the chairman a fat stupid CANT (that must be about transfer money).  Too many CANTS around here still.

 

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Tactics

 

Not getting the hang of this tactics business.  Cant work out how it works for us. That makes me a CANT too.  Asked the gaffer but he was too busy to help.  Asked Terry Mac and he laughed. Must stay calm and positive 

 

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Gaffer has asked to borrow my course notes on tactics.  Must be to see if I’m learning the right stuff.  I’m lucky to be working for a top coach like.  I’ll start learning tactics from him soon I bet.

 

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DIET

 

Are meat pies part of our diet?  Saw a load in Stevie Carrs bag.  Must ask the gaffer.

 

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ANOTHER JOB PROMOTION!!!!!  Have taken over tea making after Terry Mac scolded his nob on a prank.  Remember milk and 2 sugars for the gaffer.

 

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Guest eyeball_tickler

unfunny. i hate you.

 

Hey ho, I'll try to live with the disappointment  :winking:

 

make a shola one, delete this thread and say sorry to me. then all will be forgiven.

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unfunny. i hate you.

 

Hey ho, I'll try to live with the disappointment  :winking:

 

make a shola one, delete this thread and say sorry to me. then all will be forgiven.

 

This is satire - Shola would be pure farce  bluebiggrin.gif 

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Guest Magnetic North

“The players always point and laugh at him when he goes past.  Must ask him what he says to make them do it.  They do it with Terry Mac too!”

 

bluelaugh.gif

 

 

 

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Some pages purporting to be from Lee Clark's coaching notebook have come into my possession  bluebiggrin.gif

 

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

 

Good lesson from the gaffer today.  He gets all the players in a line and says “Step forward all those who think they’re good enough to play on Saturday.....Not you Albert”.   Then everyone falls about laughing.  Albert Lucky’s keeping all wor spirits up!

 

 

 

 

bluelaugh.gif

 

The thing is I could actually see that being true  bluelaugh.gif

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