Shearergol

Basically just add a zero on the end of any transfer fees from 5 years ago.

What the fuck? 30 years old FFS. RIP big man.

Was good at the Africa cup of nations. No idea what he's like at club level though.

He's not reliable at all. He's made loads of stuff up recently (Cavani to Man City etc)

Prolific Premier League striker and France international. Yeah, that'd be shit like Sign him if only to stop him scoring against us. Doesn't he score like 4 a game against us?

Man City are supposedly about to spunk some more hundreds of millions, so there's that. Bet loads of that is going back into the grass roots of English football.

So Real are bidding £160m on two players? What's the point in everyone else trying to compete?

Would be an amazing signing. I'd be "Shaqiri to Stoke" levels of disappointed if he went to West Ham without us trying to sign him I know it's stupidly early in the transfer window, but it does seem like a lot of clubs we want to be competing with are trying to get their business done early. I wonder if we're gonna have to start offloading soon (Mitrovic etc) before we show our hand.

And Dummett doesn't play like that in the PL? Just because he can put in a tackle or two doesn't make him a good full-back. He's fucking shit unless he's playing at CB where it's easier for him to hide his positional limitations. He's absolutely not shit like - have a look at our record with and without him in the Premier last time - if he hadn't got injured we would probably have stayed up. Getting in early for the forum awards I see. Wow.

Rooney? Micky?

Defenders tend to get more time to adapt. Well, maybe not at this club.

We need someone with experience of the league who doesn't take a year to get used to it imo.

I'd love for us to sign him. He'd go to Everton if he became available though. Or Southampton.

Think people have way too high expectations going into next season. Townsend is exactly the sort of player we should be looking at. Hazard might not want to come this far North.

Rather have Dummett You'd rather have Dummett do what?

Streaky? He scored in 22 games this season. Harry Kane scored in 20.

Hell yes. Is he leaving Everton then??

On £150k a week? One of the league's best fullbacks in his time though.

Yeah, let's set the limit at £65k per squad player. 1972 rules.

You've added "NO MITRO" to "MITRO COMES ON". It makes no sense.

Is one of those fans Colback?

Curry and chips mate. Does anyone not still living in the 80s still use the word "Chinky"?

He'll just go back to Celta

If Rafa gets his way i can't see that not being the case tbh. The mere fact he wanted a CM and winger in January means he knows we need both, plus it's obvious to pretty much everyone we don't have a 10 fit for purpose. Probably worth giving One Lung another punt tbh. Aye, into the Tyne. Why has he only played half of PSV's games? Injured?

He's obviously a very good player but personally I would rather sign an experienced player to develop our own lads than give experience to a Chelsea youngster. But we can't buy 8 new players, we're gonna have to loan some too. Zouma would be a great choice, then spend some money on some creative players.