Skeletor

How is Lovenkrands this injured out of that?

Well our rivals aren't playing a team quite like Chelsea today.

Stop listening to him.

Lampard booked for diving.

Game has gone quiet last few minutes.

He's got a magnificent tan. Phil Brown will be enquiring where he got it.

He's lying then.

Anelka gives us a heart attack!

Nicky Butt intent on killing Malouda

Nicky Butt with his token stupid tackle.

Ivanovic foiling Martins

Martins with some Zidane wizardry there.

59%-41% possession to us

Martins almost scored a fluke

Good save Harper

This proves Spurs are officially good for nothing.

I'd root for Spurs even if we were in the European spots. Would love to see Big Sam get relegated.

Sad day when any of us have to root for Spurs for any reason.

Bassong is like "As if you're talking to me, bitch, don't you know who I am?"

Vince McMahon playing the role of Derek Llambias.

Ching sounds lulzy.

The Dowie smiley makes me feel physically ill.

They'd probably put his corpse in a tracksuit, string it up on the bench, and pay it 10k a week. Jesus, I'm not even joking. Corpse in a tracksuit? Sounds like Hughtons their man then.

So who's gonna finish off Kinnear for the greater good?

There'll be hell on Tyneside if Shearer is removed and Kinnear re-installed as manager.