Keefaz

All you Italians look the same.

Oh, ffs, whining about a throw-in.

Oh, this kid can fuck right off.

Nice side-footer, that.

Roaring at a squirrel?

What a knobber.

Brilliant news.

Just roll the ball to Coloccini. How hard can it be?

Fucking hell. It's like brainwashing.

What did he think the whole Mackem in Milan thing was about?

97% possession apparently. No doubt all of it of 5 yard passes. f***ing HELL, that's impressive. i'm lost here like. I didn't watch the match, but now I'm expecting the highlights to show Parker just twirling round the centre circle for the entire duration. If this didn't actually happen, I'll be disappointed. It was worse than that. He would get the ball, spin round twice, lay the ball off 5 yards sideways or backwards, then run in a BIG circle to arrive back in the same point, demanding the ball. Guy's mental.

Na, Steven Taylor is like an orange Micah Richards.

Fucking hell.

If the band did Anarchy in the UK for 90 mins, it'd be better.

Was there any point in him actually playing?

Can't believe the England band is still going. How is that load of old oompah of any use whatsoever?

What the fuck was that? Shittest dive in history.

Wellbeck is unimpressive.

Gary Cahill with a proper cowie face.

I've heard of a move some of the big teams are doing called a '1-2'. Dunno if something like that's worth a go.

Vintage Van Bommel.

The new Wembley has never been very impressive. Good night out, food's not bad, and they keep a decent enough cellar.

Judging a team after 13 mins Aye, I've seen none of these players before.

Tried to force the ball twice: lost the ball twice.