Mowen

No match thread is complete without a Mowen "we'll shit/fuck/cock them" prediction. We will! edit: I sometimes say we'll nob them fwiw

The more I think about it the more I can see us losing tomorrow. Luckily I've had a few beers to drown this rationality out and think we'll absolutely cock them.

But... but... but City are facing Villa. Hedging my bets. I meant Chelsea, not Villa.

City, Villa, Barca -1, Real -1

From the extremely brief viewing I got of him at Forest...I think we've got one here. Could be absolute quality. Not seen anything of him before or since mind.

leon best is mint. 30 seconds in - he knows the drill

He was good when he started as well. For some reason he's made a choice to be lazy, it's a shame. I play every saturday but when a [formerly] world class player is offering his opinion I have to hope for something more than a cliché, offer some insight into the game you played so brilliantly week in week out. I feel like I could offer more at times and I'm both stupid and shite at football.

Before of after he got rid of them? http://i253.photobucket.com/albums/hh51/ZuLiIiIi/Various/thats_the_joke.jpg Fucking love it Pilko, spent ages looking for this a while ago to no avail

I apologise. I only took it out on you because I spent a significant amount of time with a southend fan tonight who couldn't stop talking about the JPT, bless him. The annoying tosser.

In fairness....what sort of cunt bets on the JPT.

I'm not sure who else he can realistically pick tbh. Our central midfield options look very limited without Wilshire, incredible how quickly we've become reliant on his availability. Cleverly's injured too, Hargreaves is perma-crock, Carrick's not played much and done very little when he has of late, Barton's decent enough but not up to scratch in the centre, Rodwell hasn't impressed me much over the past 12 months after his initial promise.

Manchester and Villa to win, about 7/4. M City -1 and M United -2 about 3/1.

Didn't Taylor do that against the Mackems a few years ago?

I've got a feeling Hatem might get carried away this week, he'll basically be running around the pitch with his nob out when he gets on, agressively slapping any Blackburn player who dares to get close round the face. It'll be something to behold, we're literally going to cock them. Or lose 1-0.

This is one of the shittest programs I've ever watched.

In a nutshell. Whilst we've still not got a proper left back on the pitch it makes the idea of switching Jonas pretty pointless. I'm not so sure I buy this. Jonas does more defensive work that HBA but José had an easy a game as you'll ever see at Everton last season because they guy in front of him was so good he pinned the opposition back. Marveaux, on first impressions, looks a better player that Jonas and by forcing the opposition's right hand side to play further back to counter his threat he will be aiding Taylor at LB by relieving the pressure on him.

My main concern is how poor he looked when we were defending set pieces, it was dangerous every time and they hit the bar from one (should have scored). Having said that it was his debut, he will have been as nervous as fuck and it's far too early to make a full judgement on him.

Head and shoulders above ability wise. Will get better and more influential as he gets back up to speed. As someone said, lovely eye for a pass, rarely loses the ball. Can't wait for him to start every week.

I feel cunted, got home at 2:45. Game was decent, we always looked comfortable when we were ahead but contrived to throw it away three times somehow and nearly lost it at the end of the 90. Some of my judgements may be a bit harsh, need to see their goals again as they were all down the far end. Elliott - 4 - thought he looked slow to react for the first one but didn't inspire any confidence in the slightest when defending set pieces, nowhere to be seen on any at our end including one they hit the bar from. Decent kicking though. Simpson - 5 - poor first half, particularly distribution wise. Improved however, particularly going forward. Coloccini - 7 - Great winner and dispossessed them classily a few times. Distribution not quite up to his normal standards however and whilst maybe not his fault will have been disappointed with how we struggled with straight long balls a few times. Perch - 5 - Made a few very good challenges but looks a disaster waiting to happen, pretty sure the first goal stemmed from his missed header. Gave away possession around our area terrifyingly after about 10 minutes. Fergie - 6 - Looked like a midfielder shoehorned in at left back but gave as good as he got until his knock and brought it out of defence a few times nicely. His pace came in handy once or twice too although struggled in the air. Gosling - 5 - Not quite up to speed, few nice touches but lost possession a bit too easily at times Abeid - 7 - Offers for the ball and moves it around nicely. Tired badly but to be expected. Gets stuck in to the challenge. Guthrie - 7 - Overrun a little at times but some very nice passes and movement. Marveaux - 8 - MOTM - classy. Great ball in for the first goal and touch to set up the pen. Looks a real player based on this short evidence. Ben Arfa - 7 - not as involved as he'd like to have been at the front but was dropping deep for the ball and generally looked head and shoulders above when he had it. Exciting stuff. Loven - 7 - Took his goals well and did much better than expected. Blowing out his arse by the time he came off. Sammy - 8 - not great delivery but scared the shit out of them to the extent that they were always doubling up on him in extra time. Looks class, dribbling was awesome. Obertan - 7 - wasted the ball a couple of times but looked good going forward and helped up counter nicely a few times. Great cross for the winner. Nominally filled in at LB once Fergie was injured, didn't stay back much Shola - 6 - Shola

Well below his high standards tonight but by virtue of being the only person who offers for the ball in tight spaces he often found himself in a tight space with nobody wanting the ball from him. Could have laid it off to the centre back a couple of times when he tried to be too clever but it must be frustrating.

Are you joking? Has a single person said we're flying or that there isn't stuff to work on? If anything it's the opposite - yes we were poor today and there are clear areas where drastic improvement is needed but you'd think it was our first point of the season and we were at the bottom of the table the way people are going on. It feels like everything has to be brilliant or shit on here at times (overall impression, not what everyone is saying) and it's ludicrous.

Not the most inspiring £40 I've ever spent...still don't think it's quite worth all the doom-mongering though. It was a disappointing performance against a QPR side who played above expectations with a number of new signings that had strengthened them and buoyed both the team and the crowd. Their three in the middle gave them control over our central midfield (which was the biggest disappointment for me, I knew Shola and Ryan were shit anyway, Chiek and Cabaye I had higher expectations for) and SWP played very well. We were let off by poor finishing at times but our last ditch defending was resolute and we still have the best defensive record in the division. Sammy looked good in his brief cameo, Ba had a couple of nice touches and Best worked hard all night and was unlucky to be denied by a good save. Obertan is frustrating but looks as though he's capable of making things happen. There's a team in there somewhere, it's up to Pardew to eke it out. We're 4th in the league FFS

The fuck is this herd cunt who plays for ebbsfleet? knob.

£5 on Chelsea, Arsenal, Man City and Kiddeminster.

Strangely unbalanced longterm view to have 4 centre backs, a left back, two central midfielders, a winger and two strikers in such a team.