Raconteur

I know this might be frowned on, but I really want to look at that squad and try to pick out a best XI. Not because I hope it's "good" - I imagine an XI from that squad is horrifying, which would be really satisfying at this point. I heard Bruce likes 3-5-2, so something like: Dubravka - Schar, Lascelles, Dummett - Manquillo, Hayden*, Shelvey, Longstaff*, Ritchie - Gayle, Muto (Man: S. Bruce) *probably being sold Yeah, that's pretty horrifying

Will stay as backup for Gayle and Muto. Dat quality.

I've been thinking that Ashley won't rush to make any new signings because we actually have heaps of contracted players - the 27 here don't include Almiron, Lejeune, Saivet, Atsu or Yedlin.

Glad my Nolan bet wasn't a paper slip else I would have torn it up - here's hoping for a second coming for Wor Kev

I wan't Pardew to come and finish the job with either Wise or Ferdinand DOF Genuine prospect wise would be my choice for it to turn toxic ASAP but ashley will never do that after pardew imo There's also the likelihood that Ashley likes Agent Wise in place on the TV (and Wise probably makes good coin doing it). Having said that, my understanding is that Steve Nickson is the one putting names in front of Charnley at the moment, and surely Ashley would like someone in a more "senior" position like DoF. Wise ticks a lot of boxes (and feeds my destructive hopes).

Nah, we'll give the other clubs the opportunity to score plenty of goals and put on a good show against our rabble. If we play a local team, we could even lose to them in order to satisfy the promoters...

I wan't Pardew to come and finish the job with either Wise or Ferdinand DOF Genuine prospect

Am I stupid for the glimmer of hope the delay in appointing Bruce affords my Nolan bet?

Really? Absolutely. It's like an 80yo woman standing up a 70yo street bum on a Tinder date. Where's that MJ popcorn gif?

Imagine a world where Sam Allardyce rejects you, and SHEFFIELD WEDNESDAY refuse you permission to appoint their manager. Imagine being the manager eventually appointed, and facing a press conference where the WHOLE WORLD knew you were behind those two dinosaurs in order of preference.

The manager is Steve Bruce. That squad only survived last season because they were coached by Rafa. The only strikers are Gayle, Muto and Joselu. Probably can expect longstaff and possibly others to leave. Season starts in 3 weeks. the club is in disarray There’s every chance Cannot believe there is a Toon fan who thinks we are "no chance" of finishing last. The only thing making it not a lock is the prospect of Sheffield United being as bad as everyone thought Cardiff were last year. gdm mentions only the starting point - that's before poor results, unmotivated players and an increasingly vocal crowd (well, hopefully). EDIT: Just realised it was Froggy. Jesus man, we're not all emos - we're just telling it as bad as it is!

Which begs the question: Why tell the world you have concluded a deal when you don't have the cash or the means to raise it?

Not an issue at the Toon as he’ll have virtually no input into signings - if, indeed, there are that many signings to make. I’ve got this feeling that Mike Ashley looks at our squad and sees a lot of players; a playing group he’s not going to add to. Why would he buy a left back when Lazaar is still on the books? Gayle and Joselu are strikers (ostensibly), so why splash out on another? People who think Ashley is going to give Brewce piles of cash are kidding themselves. What was that “Bruce family leak” - £40m and a proportion of sales cash? In Mike Ashley’s world, that’s a single £25m player (plus agents fees and wages) Mind you, that view satisfies my hopes that we beat Derby’s record low points total and may be wishful thinking. But, after all we’ve seen, is it so crazy?

I said about ten pages ago - if Bruce and Shearer are besties, then what sort of advice did Wor Al offer when Bruce was considering the offer? Surely he warned him off?

No safety wink is a curious strategy...

You’re condemning yourself with lunacy like this. You genuinely think Chris Hughton would accept the NUFC manager’s job from Mike Ashley? After Pardew was contracted and held in place until Ashley found the right time to fire Hughton?

They took a side that came second in the Championship and survived two PL campaigns - how can you transform a squad like that without spending squillions unless you have a manager like Rafa Benitez? Leffe was generous - net spend is almost entirely irrelevant in Brighton’s context.

Absolute non-starter - Hughton coming back to Mike Ashley after being fired for Pardew?

Surely if he's mates with Shearer, then surely Wor Al might say something like "Mate, steer clear of these toxic cunts. I know it seems like it's a good job. It's not. I know."

What makes you guys think Mike Ashley wants input from the manager as to which players to buy?

Why would Patrick Vieira take the Toon job?

Depends who is defining "decent".

I hope the majority of our fans have a bad reaction to whomever is appointed from God to John Carver’s pants. But they won’t.

Shame, there was talk of him coming to Australia!

No I'm just waiting for official announcements. Any 'latest update' from any journalist source, twitter ITK, gobshite either supporting or rubbishing the takeover and this place swings like a pendulum with opinions and counter opinions, conspiracy theories and just plain bollocks. I've always from day one said we need for it officially to come out. It does need BZG to release this statement (if indeed there is one as again it's from a Twitter radio presenter and the Gazette). The claims and counter claims need to be ended one way or the other by a statement from BZG or the club or jointly. I think you're being disingenuous there - you have clung very firmly to the two BZG statements and dismissed (indeed, ridiculed) virtually everything else. You asked on the last page "If that's the case why did they release their original statement as it said all agreed." As a Toon fan, having watched how many takeover bids fail, can you not come up with a rational answer beyond "There was a genuine agreement when they made the statement"? It seems to me that their statements have been premature at best. It seems obvious that Mike Ashley is not acting in good faith. And yet you're BZG's most loyal man (at least the most loyal one that doesn't resort to Photoshop!) It's... admirable.