Ronaldo

Was just gonna say that. Unbelievable.

A mental take.

Close second.

Nowt we don’t know. Complete forward. World class to a greater extent than anyone I can remember wearing our shirt.

Special.

I know it’s horses for courses as a PFM would say but if I was Isak I would be extremely unhappy about Callum Wilson getting the nod over me for the season opener. He’s too talented to sit on the bench unless there’s a very good reason for it - ie necessary squad rotation during CL weeks.

What, since April?

I thinks he’s basically a decent player. Our standards defensively are now so high he’d be a clear weak link.

Ryder said the same thing a week ago: Targett had been so good in pre-season that he’d overtaken Burn for LB. You can only laugh at the mong.

Fucking hell we better hope not. I don’t think he’s abject but better players will eat him for breakfast.

Fair play to him. Looked a really intelligent player this pre-season. Shame we don’t have the squad to let him go on loan and play lots of football this season, but on the other hand working with Howe every day in training is obviously a positive.

Was then at fault for 2 goals in fairness. Turned out to be a really poor keeper who didn’t improve one bit from 25 to 32.

Schar gave Sandro a bollocking after that 2nd Villa goal.

Are we absolutely sure these games aren’t scripted? That was Goldust over the top rope stuff by Digne and Mings.

You could say that about a fair few, in truth. I know FFP is a thing but it would genuinely cost a combined £15m (gross) to upgrade about 5 of them.

“Gave the keeper no chance.” Dubravka practically dived out the way of it.

Eh? Trippier has 5 goals in his PL career.

Nonsense, was a suicide pass.

Bit disappointing that all of our ‘rivals’ have made strides to be genuinely stronger while we haven’t signed anyone. Still, plenty time left I guess.

Shame as he’s just what we needed. We won’t sign anyone better.

Marcel’s as strong as an ox. That’s what Ray said.

Ey?

Who on earth suggested we buy Adam Armstrong?

Maddison is as proven as it gets in the PL mind. Wouldn’t swap Isak or Bruno for him, don’t get me wrong. Obvs neither would Hans.