Gallowgate Toon

Don't care. Pardew's going nowhere, the game will be rubbish with little quality on show and it's absolutely pointless in terms of the league (apart from possible mini champions, of course!).

This is called scraping the barrel, definitely. The bloke's run out of ideas, doesn't know how to get the team to function so does something radical in a desperate attempt, instead. I can forgive them saying that this season is over if they were actually showing signs of putting something together for next the next campaign.

That team is utterly disgusting. Gosling Ameobi Gouffran in a midfield 3 Dummett as a wing back is very odd too considering he appears to have the least attacking ability of the 3 LBs on our books. Absolutely reeks of desperation, that selection.

3-1 Stoke. Tight first half where we play OK, concede on the stroke of half time, collapse and concede 2 within 15 minutes of the second half but grab a Dan Gosling consolation shinner in the 89th.

I don't mind the lad not starting but Pardew should at least try and bed him in with 30 minutes a match.

Can't have Dortmund going through instead of Real, man. Worked out fine last year. I watched the final on my phone while drinking and playing darts. Can't have that f***ing all-German rubbish again. Too much fan involvement and sensible ownership ey? Rotten state of affairs. Don't forget that horrible football they play too.

Caulker, Fer and Redmond would all be excellent signings for us. Especially the former and latter as they'd actually provide something that we've needed for ages.

He sounds truly inspiring. He was Llambias' understudy, IIRC, which means he should be an improvement on JFK, at least.

Glad to see him doing well out there. It'll be interesting to see what happens with him over the Summer. He'd probably get in our current central midfield

I think Gerrard has scored as many as Remy now

Our refs are so bad, man.

Yep. I think the players would do a lot better if they were playing for enjoyment if nothing else. How do you enjoy camping in your own half behind the ball with rarely more one man allowed anywhere near the opposition penalty area? This. I mean, if you aren't planning for next season and have nothing left to play for, surely creating a relaxed atmosphere where players can express themselves and entertain the paying fans would be the logical choice.

Impressive tally of goals for Gerrard.

Cracking stuff from Everton. Martinez has done far better than I ever thought he would.

Nice to see that while he's obviously not re-found consistent goalscoring, he's at least regained some confidence in his general play and first touch. I was quite impressed with some of his link-up, he's obviously not brilliant at it but he's just looking more like his old self where he wasn't horrible.

The escape-goating continues: http://www.chroniclelive.co.uk/sport/football/football-news/loic-remy-set-return-hatem-6925288

Going to be interesting to see how his role in transfers changes since there's now no DoF or Chairman to work with Carr. Will we finally see Tomkins through the door?

At least they call it like it is. Of course. It's just utterly embarrassing witnessing professional footballers play like that for your club and for it then to be highlighted for everyone for the umpteenth time.

I'm glad we've got the two worst pundits to comment on our terrible defending. Is there any MNF this week? Can't wait for us to be mocked by Neville and Carragher, again.

So embarrassingly simple.

Gosling's no Premier League player but it was sort of refreshing to see one of our central midfielders turn and look forward when on the ball rather than immediately going backwards.

On loan at Dijon, I think.

Lovely finish.

Kompany's lucky Crooks isn't on this. Can't be having any sensible technology suggestions.