Ketsbaia

I'm doing much better in the McDonalds one, like. The rules are far superior as it feels like cheating when subs are made before each match. There's a bit more skill to it, so roll on the new Premier League one - already got some ideas!

Was torn between making Iniesta and Silva captain. I went Iniesta.

I had Mandzukic, Alba, Silva and Iniesta ©. So that should be 2 goals, a clean sheet and 3 assists?

Mandzukic i had him before it was cool

Seemed a bit hesitant to me but i'm sure we'll be alright. Suave as fuck.

Love lineker, like.

Newcastle

Good game, both sides playing well.

Can you get strawberry syrup in Turkey?

Ok, i've done well with subs today and really confident. But yous have all probably just done the same, so whats the point? Stalemate.

Hmmm i could put a price tag on Tiote, Cabaye or Krul but i dont think we could replace Ben Arfa at all. Certainly not like-for-like. But this is hypothetical because Chelsea will not be in for Ben Arfa.

Rumours that Fabregas is injured, which makes the decision even more difficult. Either Fabregas, Pirlo or Rami.

Sir Les is on Keys & Gray from 12-1 today. Legend!

But I thought that was a spoof website?

Oh dear. Ohhhh dear. This is war! Do people reckon Fabregas will start again today?

Neil won't like this but I think Moyes is a perfect fit for Spurs. He'll be frustrated at still having no money at Everton and he's hit a wall there - they keep finishing 7th. Spurs is the highest level he can get to - he won't end up at Man Utd - as they have potential, they have money and they can meet his ambitions.

To be fair, everything he has said on Twitter has been spot on so far. Unfortunately. Like his spelling of Galatasaray?

Clearly, he isn't going to Chelsea.

Ditto. Lets pray. Although, having thought about it, I guess Levy is more ambitious and wants someone with Champions League pedigree. Let's hope so.

I am slightly nervous about Pardew tbh, not gonna lie. And I'm even willing to accept reassurance from Martin Jol....

Yep. And will Abramovich have heard of Debuchy? He'll be after an Alves or a Simpson.

Is this the first ever self giggsing? I am aware of this, yes.

Great to see Harry gone, although Spurs will probably push on without him. Then again, if they've got their sights on a Martinez, maybe not. Also, I have new material for my Harry impressions

You had Gomez as captain, don't you dare start complaining!!!

Norwich at home. Hughton back at SJP.....they love their opening day stories.