Neil

It would, but a) I doubt he'd come and b) I doubt Moyes would have him back, the way he walked out on us.

Nope, but can I guess - are we looking to loan him back?

OK, so Carrick is "shit". How do you rate Cabaye?

Not just saying this, but I've always rated Carrick. Even when people were lambasting him for being s****, I dunno, there's something about him I really like. Didn't Alonso/Xavi say he had a Spanish-esque style about him? He has the technical ability IMO, just has lacked consistency. Carrick is pure class man. He was exceptional the time he was with us but he's the sort of player that needs to play for your club to appreciate everything he bring to the table imo. He seems to have lacked some confidence at Man Utd. When he's on form he's a very smooth player to watch, sprays the passes about with aplomb.

Absolutely scandalous if Sturridge doesn't go. Welbeck I like the look of but not on the same scale. Same goes with Phil Jones.

Not just saying this, but I've always rated Carrick. Even when people were lambasting him for being shite, I dunno, there's something about him I really like. Didn't Alonso/Xavi say he had a Spanish-esque style about him? He has the technical ability IMO, just has lacked consistency.

Finally took Rooney out, put Ba in. Took Eagles out, Mata in. My own fault really, should've kept him in after last week. At least Sturridge © got a goal.

Was it? Didn't look like it was far from Cerny, seemed like poor keeping. Good run, but Christ on a bike he was given the freedom of West London.

Young fella.

Barton's poor pass, but what the hell is the QPR defence doing? Jesus, Moyes would've been proud of that standing off.

Oh dear Atletico. Beaten 2-0 at home by Real Betis.

Brilliant ball across from Bothroyd, surely someone had to get on the end of it.

My WORD!

This match should be over and done with by now.

"No he can't miss that." Well he just did Ray, how you going to react, YOUNG MAN?

Beren, man. Don't be subtle or anything.

My word, Ray. My word.

The Everton Guide to Fucking Up At Home: First 20 minutes: give the impression you're a good team by being "all over" the other team - this can be either actual domination such as vs Norwich, or mere bullshit possession stuff that goes nowhere apart from the odd overhit pass out of play for a throw in/goal kick, such as vs QPR, and indeed most games. Stop! What are you doing? This game needs a twist. The opposition will now score with their first meaningful attack. Remember - the opposition must score first, it gets the players on their toes. This should normally be after 25-35 minutes. Examples: QPR - scoring first after 31 minutes Sheff Utd - 28 minutes Wigan - 31 minutes Man Utd - 19 minutes Wolves - 37 minutes Stoke - 15 minutes Norwich - 28 minutes To recover, give it to Baines and hope he can do something. Failing that, go down with a whimper e.g. vs Stoke, have a plethora of shots that don't trouble the keeper and lose e.g vs Man Utd and QPR. Sometimes, it's best you do win and actually get some points. Tactics: you must play players who work hard. The likes of Drenthe have too much technical quality, DO NOT START. Rodwell? Punish him for sneaking out to play for England by benching him. Players like Heitinga are essential first-teamers; superior defenders such as Distin ought not to get a look in. WARNING: You must play Tim Cahill in any given situation. Follow this and you can't go right. Enjoy!

Just having a browse at some of those comments make me feel fucking sick. Well then, can I suggest a trip to the Daft Confessions Thread?

Yeah, I do. You're a total racist.

General Chat's been bloody outstanding the past few days. Outstandingly embarrassing.

Like a shit Cole Sear from Sixth Sense. "I know real people."

Let's just emphasise the point. 'I believe that, when we lost against Newcastle, that was when it started and I haven't been able to quell the fire because the results haven't been there for us,' he said. 'All of a sudden last year (when Newcastle took four points from their two league games) is regurgitated but we must have done something right because we finished tenth. 'We finished above Newcastle. Judge us by the end of it (this season). Let's see when their bad run comes. That doesn't faze me at all because they've had a good start – good luck to them. But to be judged solely against Newcastle? Hang on a minute – we've finished above them in the last three years. 'Is it just to be judged on finishing above Newcastle? Well, I'm sorry. There's a bigger picture than that. Unfortunately – if we keep thinking that way, then whoever is manager here – or at Newcastle – they will find the same difficulties. 'It is out of proportion here. It's because the support for the clubs is second to none. They haven't won anything for years but they still support their team which is absolutely admirable. And that's why I came here. Can I be the one who gives them something to sing about? At the moment I can't. Surely we've got to be better than just finishing above Newcastle for the bragging rights. Surely the aim has to be to go forward and win an FA Cup. Who knows – it might be our year? We're capable of winning five or six games.

Oh no, not this pathetic "I'm a bigger fan than you" argument again.