Lush Vlad

I know that picture isn't the most flattering. But fuck me, you must have low standards

You owe me one new house Nah. f*** betting on a pub game. I think I bet on darts once. Klaasen to win the world championship, or whatever it's called. Got 20/1 in the early stages. Anderson absolutely wiped the floor with him in the final, though.

Should just round that lot up and set fire to them. You can add the Red Witch Colback to the pyre, and all. For the night is dark and full of useless shithouses.

I've had the twat at work that shouts "BEVERAGE" every 5 minutes, already having a dig this morning. He has already admitted in the past, that he hates football. Yet decides to chirp up. Tosser. My boss also has no clue whatsoever. Yet keeps chiming in. I feel pretty 'meh' about it all. Which is a good thing, TBH. As if I felt like I did after the last time we went down. I think I'd be getting the sack, like.

Kirchoff looks quality TBF and would walk into our pathetic midfield. That's not much of an endorsement, mind

Forgot about Mbabu. Would like him to stay on.

"please rest assured we will communicate more fully with supporters." Ah that's good to know. Really reassuring. So they'll keep sending e-mails and doing those pointless fan forums. Whilst we languish in mid-table in the Championship and we still have a load of useless fucks, running our beloved club.

Harsh on Dummett, but agree with the rest. Dummett is very limited going forward. But I actually think he is a very reliable defender and I wouldn't put him in the fraud squad, with the likes of Colback, Colo and Co.

Beggars can't be choosers, we're now a Championship team there's nothing whatsoever that could convince me keeping colback is a good idea, we could sell him for 5m or something to a PL team and replace with a championship journeyman...we'd be miles better off Agreed. To think NE journos used to say he should be in the England squad, when he was playing for the mackems. He doesn't do anything, apart from pick up yellow cards! Undersized, slow and weak. Doesn't have the ability to unlock a defence. Will never chip in with too many goals. He's not exactly got a great technique and he doesn't really play a particular role. Why would anyone want to keep him?! He just plays in a non descript role and he's terrible at that.

Who I'd like to keep (trying to be realistic): Krul, Elliot or Darlow Anita Lascelles Mbemba Dummett Shelvey Aarons Townsend de Jong Mitrovic Armstrong That isn't a 4-4-2, BTW. Just different positions. I'd love to keep hold of Perez, too. But I can't see him staying. I think we need 2-3 new centre midfielders. As Tiote will be off, Saivet hasn't been rated since the minute he signed and that whole deal stinks. I see Anita as a right back now and I don'tt see him playing centre mid. You just know we'll be stuck with Colback, though. Detest that useless little fraud. Offers absolutely fuck all, but he'll be happy to stay on good wages and no fucker will want him, anyway. Cheers Pardew. Another masterstroke. If we keep Colo.........

Can't disagree with any of that. I was so happy that we had got rid of Carver and Pardew. That I had low expectations of him, but would have been happy with half decent football and a mid-table finish. That was too much to ask, of course

Well, in fairness. The rot started with Pardew. Carver then managed to somehow make it worse McClaren just continued the s*** work of his predecessors. I think you are being very kind to Mcclaren tbh. He/the club spent a s*** load of money on the squad during his time here, and we ended up somehow worse Of course we didn't buy in key areas that we needed, but the players we have are capable of better than relegation fodder ffs I'm not sticking up for him, in any way. He is a terrible manager and it was an awful appointment. But Pardew had a very talented squad in a relegation scrap a few years back. Carver took a team that were doing alright'ish, as in, they were on one of Pardew's streaks, into a relegation scrap. I think the rot started long ago and I don't think it is Schteve that set us on this path. It started way back. Ultimately, we've been shit for pretty much the whole time Ashley has owned us. It's just one bad decision after another and acting on them when it's too late.

You have to be at least average going forward thoughton, they shouldn't be exclusive of each other. Exactly, they shouldn't be mutually exclusive. He is solid defensively, but offers absolutely nothing going forward. Considering we don't play a left footed winger in front of him. It really fucks us up. As we have no width down that side and there is usually loads of space for him to overlap and join in the attack. But he just doesn't bother, or he can't, because he isn't good enough. I quite like him and I think he is a really solid defender, TBH. I just think fullbacks who are comfortable on the ball and are good going forward. Are pretty important if you want to play decent, passing football.

Plenty of Sunderland chants from the sad c***s at Villa Park on Saturday and a couple of mackem shirts on display as well. Sad c***s. Their fans are absolutely pathetic. I thought it was a protest against Lerner? Seemed to be more like a sunderland appreciation day.

Well, in fairness. The rot started with Pardew. Carver then managed to somehow make it worse McClaren just continued the shit work of his predecessors.

I have never seen a player look so uncomfortable when attacking. He never wants to cross the ball and when he does, he usually waits too long to attempt it. At one point against Villa, he had acres to run into. He went about 20 yards, got into their half, then stopped, turned around, ran back into our half and then passed it to someone else He is solid defensively, but he doesn't do anything at all when he has the ball at his feet, or when we have possession going forward.

More than that, I'd say it's about abandoning a short-term mentality. If he's an integral player in our promotion team, we'll likely be relegated the following season. If he's going to be guaranteed his place in the heart of midfield, as the local English lad who stuck through relegation and promotion, there's no chance we'll be able to build a team which can strike the right balance between being defensively sound and posing a credible threat to the opposition once we're back in the big time. It'll be more aimless running, conceded free kicks and yellow cards going one way... and s*** technique, passing and vision going the other way. Spent basically his entire career, in one big relegation scrap. What's the old adage? The game is often won and lost in midfield?

Good post. Colback has actually looked ok in recent weeks. Where we haven't had much possession and in games where we weren't expected to get much, or have much of the ball. City and Liverpool for the former, Swansea for the latter. In a game we are expected/need to win. He throws in a 2/10, looks slow and ponderous on the ball, misses a sitter and constantly makes the wrong decision. I hope he goes. But he won't. I think we'll keep about 5-6 starters and he'll be one of them.

Well, Barton and Guthrie are decent in the Championship. I don't think they have the physical attributes to be top central midfielders in the prem. However, unlike Colback. They have redeeming qualities. I'm not sure what Colback actually does, bar press the opposition reasonably well and run around quite a lot?

Aston Villa/Newcastle Both Teams to Score? No.

He is so bad and has no fight about him whatsoever. Anita is probably one of the smallest players in the prem. Yet watching him on Saturday, he really gets stuck in and challenges for headers, he has no right to be winning. Compare and contrast to Colback, who looks like a small child, playing up 3 years and about 5 leagues above his ability. I lost count of the amount of times he got wrong side. He gave away a load of cheap/stupid fouls, pulled his man back, tripped his man, bottled a load of headers and lost the ball every time he tried to get past his man. He just gets eased out of it all the while and gets bullied all game. No idea how he wasn't booked?! Such a weak c***.

10. I'm looking for the positives. Ashley unhappy and losing money, Carr and Charnley out of a job. That's all I've got.

Love Rafa. But I think he got it wrong on Saturday. I said before the match. I was worried about our tactics. As we have been letting other teams have a lot of the ball and playing on the counter. He's made us hard to beat and it's worked really well. However, against a team that has no interest in actually trying. That was never going to work. We wasted 45 minutes, where we just tried to keep it tight and where it seemed like we just wanted to match Villa. By match them, I mean do as little as them and don't actually worry about attacking. Wijnaldum should have been taken off/moved centrally, earlier. Tiote was IMO, our best player. Would have left him on over that fraud Colback. Oh and I wouldn't have even bothered letting Cisse come out for the second half. He was pathetic, again. Mitro is hardly much better, mind. Still, the damage was done long before Rafa. So it's hard to put too much blame on him. If you can't beat Villa home or away, you deserve to go down. They are one of the worst teams I have ever had the misfortune of watching live. Considering I've watched a lot of NUFC over the years. That's a pretty damning indictment

Cisse is absolutely awful. It was as if someone had swapped the ball, for one of the beach balls from the crowd. He had a couple of chances to run in behind with the ball and just tripped over it. It was like watching a toddler try and run with the ball. He offers absolutely fuck all. Mitro wasn't much better. Even in the warm up, his finishing looks horrendous. Back to goal and fighting with centre backs, he looks great. When it comes to scoring and having a bit of composure, he looks shite. He is so slow, as well. Ultimately, we're going down. As the mackems have Defoe and we have a useless donkey, in Cisse, that has been shit for a while and a 21 year old, inexperienced lad. That looks like he could be a better centre back than striker. Having a goal scorer hides a multitude of sins.

If it's the show I'm thinking of. It is painfully unfunny and a bit shit.