Altamullan

I try not to buy into the whole malevolence meme, re all this. It is more just incompetence and an inadequate business model, me thinks.

Right. I am f***ed off with this s*** now. The Pamtalaimon is no more. Demised, resting, stunned, kippin’, pinin’ ... or maybe: “E's a stiff! Bereft of life, 'e rests in peace! If I hadn't glued 'im to the avatar 'e'd be pushing up the daisies! 'Is metabolic processes are now 'istory! 'E's off the twig! 'E's kicked the bucket, 'e's shuffled off 'is mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleedin' choir invisibile!!”

£19m and then cheapass dry-ice cluster-fuck of a welcome video. Thank goodness we’re not Southampton fans, that’s what I say!

Right here:

Is he banned/injured/on gardening leave? ( he says, reigning in deluded optimism...)

You don’t know how lovely you are...

If Jorgensen is the only realistic target (or the best Rafa can hope to get). This is probably the obligatory up the pressure by being seen to go after someone else leak.

Other than some tweets, I can’t find much fan reaction from Brighton re Mitrovic. Is it even a story down there?

Fascinating. Thanks

Really? Me too. You must have brought the best out of it, Kid. I found it a bit unresponsive and, well, vacuous.

Cheerio you lovable mad bastard.

Steady on...

I found it funny and hopeful (now slightly embarrassed to admit) in equal measure. Thought I’d share the joy..

It’s off. Meh-meh-whoop-meh.

It is on. Whoop-whoop-meh-whoop!

But she said ‘Howay’ m’lud, which my client, Mr Biffa Asperger, took to mean Ahem and I quote: “ Get yer cock out noo, like, bonny lad.” It has only later come to light that she actually meant: “ Had away and shite ye ugly fucker, ye’ve got nee chance.”

This is Futbol, suggests we are after Slimani (£30m) as well as Jorgensen... with Mitro to go (maybe Gayle also?).

Repugnant. Christ. You’ve got high standards, H! [joke]

He already has won a trophy. As did Keegan. Before anybody diminishes them, they both felt like winning something to me. To be honest though, having to put up with the soap opera that is NUFC, I would actually trade consistent competitive seasons in the top six for a ‘trophy’ of any kind. I want to go back to worrying about whether we’ll qualify for Europe, rather than whether we’ll be relegated. Being disappointed as we chalk up our seventh loss and miss out on a serious title challenge, again. Feel the sense of pride (disbelief) in realising that we can give anyone a game on our day. I wonder whether most boro fans would trade their league cup for something similar. It’s a stupid comparison I guess. But with Rafa we have the chance to achieve such status once again (the brief but sweet taste of it we had) and the chance to win a cup. Personally, the former seems much more important. Less intense joy but so much more of it spread out over a much longer time.

The point which stands out for me, which a number of people are making, is that we shouldn’t take goal scoring elsewhere or any other single stat, as predicting/meaning too much in the EPL; without a heavy pinch of salt. You don’t need to be a genius to spot quality/potential of some players (Suarez, van Nistlerooy etc) irrespective of what league they are playing in. It simply reduces the probability of getting a dud, somebody not realising the potential they have, if they have demonstrated their quality in the same league.

I think both Siem de Jong (57 goals in 168 for Ajax) and Wijnaldum (40 goals in 109 for PSV) had been player of the year, or some such, in recent seasons before they joined us. Guess you can make a case for Gini having made the transition (glossing over a relegation and away form in general). On reflection, and to be fair to him, de Jong’s (the elder) chances were scuppered by injury.

That man has too much time on his hands. Needs to get back to polishing his magic hat (...not meant to sound rude, btw!)

Gameweek 25 Swansea 0-1 Arsenal West Ham 1-1 Palace Huddersfield 0-2 Liverpool Chelsea 2-0 Bournemouth Everton 1-1 Leicester Newcastle 1-0 Burnley Southampton 2-0 Brighton Man City 3-1 WBA Stoke 2-1 Watford Spurs 0-2 Man Utd

Journalist (Marcel van de Kraan??) from Holland on Talksport (who “talks to Jorgensen every week.”) basically warning that he doesn’t see him as being a success in England. Also generally suggesting extreme caution in signing all but the very best of the Eredivisie.