Altamullan

Guessing you must be from some ‘non-aligned’ pit village, near hell; a sheep-shagger; or rattling around some soulless new town.

What the fucking hell is that?

Did you watch the full game? Genuinely curious.

Cuntish, Chelsea-centric, take on the match by Lawrenson, on MOTD. Inference that we looked more of a Championship side than Cardiff. No acknowledgement of what sounded like, in the main, a good first half performance, conceding two goals on the break /counter attack, and then the difficulty of facing a two goal deficit against a top team.

At home 1.30 kick-off.

More likely the Russian, Nivva Heardov.

“Tom Cairney has not travelled with the Fulham squad for today’s clash at Barnsley. The Scot has been linked with West Ham this month, with the club ready to pay £15m to get him. Fulham claim his absence is down to a knee problem - but speculation is rife.” Mirror blog. Think we were quoted £20m for him in the summer? Risky (and too complicated for our glorious leaders) to do some kind of elaborate swap around at this stage, but Shelvey to West Ham, Gayle to Fulham, Cairney to us would be fine by me; oh, need to chuck us buying Iheanacho from Leicester (whatever chance there was surely diminished by Ulloa loan to Brighton) and Luan (the number 10 answer). I’d never heard of latter before this morning, but having read around and looked at the highlights reels he sounds and looks like he would really give us something else.

I met him briefly and he seems a lovely man as well: stopped to have a kick around with my son & other lads.

“Newcastle United have been given until Monday to land Feyenoord’s Nicolai Jorgensen. The Magpies’ last bid for the Danish striker was £15million but Feyenoord are holding out for up to £20million for their 10-goal top scorer. Feyenoord want to keep their main marksman, but would cash in if their valuation is met.” Mirror blog. That’s Monday. As in Twenty-fucking-ninth of January.

“Iheanacho's future still in question Kelechi Iheancacho wants to leave Leicester, with Newcastle still waiting patiently in the wings. The Nigerian, who scored twice in the 5-1 FA Cup win over Peterborough, has started just two Premier League games since his £25m summer move from Manchester City. A deal depends on Toon’s pursuit of Feyenoord’s Nicolai Jorgensen.” Mirror Blog. Him and Luan (... sadly, very similar to one off the wrist imaging ‘enjoying’ some intimacy with a famous filly).

Luan! Offered to Newcastle (to bump up price/create imaginary interest?) Don’t think he would have been on the list and doubt anybody who wasn’t would even be considered at this stage. He looks exciting though. Get Mira to give him a bell!

June. July. August. January.

Free Saturday. Today should be a busy day in terms of key conversations/negotiations for players. Here’s hoping they involve Rafa in some of the discussions.

You’re not enroute to London are you? Oh well... it’s not that far from and, tbh, a bit of of time out of Coventry can’t be bad

Howay Charners, fuck these greedy-gets off and make Slimani an offer he can’t refuse! Victory dance awaiting.

Let’s not punish the afflicted. A referral to their local memory assessment/dementia service would be kinder.

Ahh! Steve Nickson. My favourite Newcastle employeee...

The club have a ‘recruitment’ department? Is Lee C the ‘HR Director’?

Few things I can remember from Saturday: Getting a bruise on the ribcage in the celebrations of our goal. Belting out in unison with the rest of the away section "You fat cockney b******, get out of our club". Trying to get the "Hey Alan Shearer" chant going. It didn't get going. Thank f*** for that. I was awfully p*ssed, don't berate. "Why not?" I say. We should sing about our old legends and players like Man United and others do. It's part of your clubs history. I agree with that but come up with something better than that song. It took off well at Old Trafford a few weeks earlier. Really loud and helped take everyone’s mind off what was happening on the pitch!!

Fucking shameful that like.

Anybody signed/linkednwith Sturridge yet?

Live by the... die by the.... (Ashley bullshit).

Just had an alarming idea. Knock Chelsea out of the cup, then they hammer us in the final game of the season and we’re relegated on goal difference... nah. Can’t see us winning on Sunday.

“The Czech club either want Newcastle to pay a £1.25m loan fee and agree to a £4m obligatory-purchase clause for the summer, or for United to stump up a £2.2m loan fee with a £3.2m option to buy. Newcastle are yet to return to Sparta with an offer, however.” Chronicle.

Good point; well made.